Naomi and Adrian

[DennisTM]

I have published my second story at http://spankingstorytime.blog/2023/03/08/naomi-and-adrian/

It features two students and what happens when he arrives late for a theatre date.

All constructive feedback gratefully received.

thanks

Dennis

 

[DisobedientHuby]

Would love to read more.  Good job

[DennisTM]

Thanks - I’ve not had a lot of feedback! D

[underpants]

I found the story well written, but I have a couple of criticisms. First I would find it more probable if she spanked him at home rather than in the theatre. The second one is a matter of taste: not everyone likes sex scenes in spanking stories. I hope you carry on writing, like I said, I thought it was very well written, despite my criticisms.

[DennisTM]

On 3/15/2023 at 9:44 AM, underpants said:

I found the story well written, but I have a couple of criticisms. First I would find it more probable if she spanked him at home rather than in the theatre. The second one is a matter of taste: not everyone likes sex scenes in spanking stories. I hope you carry on writing, like I said, I thought it was very well written, despite my criticisms.

Thanks. I should have included a tag for consensual sex.  The spanking in the theatre was about the control Naomi has over Adrian, his embarrassment and the risk of being observed ( which was in the second spanking). I have a storyline for part 2 which includes a humiliating spanking in a fancy dress shop.... but I'm not sure when I will get round to it....

[richb]

Would love to read more of these two also.  The risk of being caught in a semi public setting, the strict girl whose boyfriend doesn't consciously want to be spanked and the escalating seriousness of the two spankings brought it all together for me.

Edited April 24 by richb

[DennisTM]

On 4/24/2023 at 4:58 AM, richb said:

Would love to read more of these two also.  The risk of being caught in a semi public setting, the strict girl whose boyfriend doesn't consciously want to be spanked and the escalating seriousness of the two spankings brought it all together for me.

Thanks Richb - much appreciated.

i lost momentum on this activity....I will try to progress it!
DennisTM