Discipline & Rules

[rubyredd]

This question is based on recent discussions in chat and mainly relates to disciplinary relationships (e.g., mentoring, accountability, DD). 

Tops: Do you tailor rules and expectations to your disciplinary partner or do you mainly set generic rules? 

• If you do not tailor to your spankee, why not? 

• What are some expectations for behavior that you always set? 

Bottoms: What do you prefer - specific rules and expectations or standard / generic?

[NewBrandon]

This is going to be a repeat of what I already said in chat but here it goes. If I am someone’s Spanker then I absolutely tailor rules and expectations to what they need. If they are seeking accountability then they most likely know what they need. If not then it’s my job to see what they are struggling with and help them out. I only have one rule that I come with and it’s no putting your life in danger. 
 

Now if I am the spankee then I expect the same thing. I don’t want some pre established rules that the spanker just has had for the last spankee. Every spankee is different and we all need different rules. At least that is my own opinion. 

[secretman]

There are absolutely some universal expectations that are reasonable in a discipline-type spanking relationship. 

Stuff like honestly, respect, listening, communication - those are rules that I tend to expect regardless of the particulars. If those kinds of rules aren't followed then it's hard to have any kind of relationship at all, let alone one that involves discipline and spanking.

At the same time, besides that in terms of rules for other kinds of behaviour it always depends on the specific person - nobody has the same behaviour, expectations, needs, etc... and every relationship is different, so you can't generalize too much beyond that. 

[Zhal]

Rules need to be agreed upon. I decided not to further pursue with an online spanker when he made rules for me without my input and got downright creepy in other things he asked of me. He said I didn't really try it, and while he's right, I told him he got downright creepy. Then I blocked him from both here and Discord.

[Lineok]

All rules between the ee and the er should be discussed ahead of time, esp if they are new together....be fair be honest....and above all respect eachother...and do what you say your going to do discipline wise

[Justin Jones]

My EE moved in 3 weeks ago .  I built a new house in a good neighborhood close to good schools ect.   

Housing and rentals are very tight in are area and essentially she would have to move to a shitty area where there's much more crime and drugs.  So her and her son moved in with me and my son.   

I don't really need rules as she is my equal but every spanking she gets is more for a bad attitude.    

Exaple : yesterday her alarm went off at 730, she turned it off and went back to bed and her kid ended up being late for school.   So this morning her alarm went off and she turned it off and tried to go back to bed . I told her to get up and get her kid ready.

 

She started in on me about how my life is so easy and she had it so rough. I explained to her how she's living rent free in a house and has keys in her purse to a new SUV. Then I said f*** it.   No more explanation and took her to the chair in our bedroom pulled her pants down and gave her a good bare ass spanking.     

 20 minutes later she is making me coffee with a smile on her face lol.   

[MrBottoms]

Each individual and each "challenge" is personally & individually tailored. The goal is to overcome the habit in question.  Habits, along with the level & longevity of the habit, is considered & then entered into the course of modification. All rules are negotiable, within reason of course, and at the sole discretion of [me 😁] the disciplinarian.

[frizzy91]

10 hours ago, rubyredd said:

This question is based on recent discussions in chat and mainly relates to disciplinary relationships (e.g., mentoring, accountability, DD). 

 

Bottoms: What do you prefer - specific rules and expectations or standard / generic?

I want the top to set them. Don’t care if it’s generic or specific to me, but I love for their to be set rules and expectations. 

[danadares]

Whether I was a Top or Bottom, discipline is always about what the spankee wants. That could be generic or specific. I prefer specific, but basic standards and expectations for behavior could be left to common sense and addressed as needed. If the Top feels their values are not compatible, or they're not providing any useful discipline to the spankee, then that element of the relationship can be scrapped.

[Spanknutt]

Why would anyone not tailor the rules? Everyone's goals and objectives are different. And I concur that the rules need to be agreed upon. They are not my rules, they are our rules. 

[Sweetdom]

On 11/30/2022 at 10:26 AM, rubyredd said:

This question is based on recent discussions in chat and mainly relates to disciplinary relationships (e.g., mentoring, accountability, DD). 

Tops: Do you tailor rules and expectations to your disciplinary partner or do you mainly set generic rules? 

• If you do not tailor to your spankee, why not? 

• What are some expectations for behavior that you always set? 

Bottoms: What do you prefer - specific rules and expectations or standard / generic?

Mostly I tailor to the spankee, and the things they want/need to work on, except for the generic health and safety stuff which would apply across the board.

[dre4mgirl]

my preference are specific rules and expectations but there are some general rules as well of course that feel like they are pretty universal like don't put yourself in danger.

my husband and I started off with general rules but they got more specific and tailored to what were actually the things I'd like to improve in. The general rules are still there in a way but many of them are now more specifically tailored to me.

[Newredbottom]

We also have established rules and rituals.  While it may seem odd having rules and set consequence makes the difference for us.

[Submissive Danny]

My wife has certain rules I have to obey like honestly, respect, listening, communication, no swearing, picking up after myself, chores that I'm responsible for and so on. She also has the option to add anything that might come up at any time without notice, Breaking any of the rules will result in an immediate discipline session.