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Submissive Dudes?


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What is the hang up? You are playing a role that you give trust and all the heavy lifting on your partner for a specific encounter. Give yourself a break IMHO. Maybe just make sure no video or pics. 


Assume you are a straight guy. Think of all the stuff you get to enjoy with her that you won’t have to experience unless in prison. 

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Well, at 68 I'm still a "sub" guy to males, females, transgenders, or couples.  Of course, I haven't succeeded in finding anyone to spank me in a decade now.  Probably one of the reasons is that I'm not interested in sex or bondage, just spanking.  Sub doesn't mean stupid either.

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What issues are you wrestling with? It's a personal decision for you. Women must also decide if being a "sub" is a "good" thing. But if you decide for yourself what role you want to play in a relationship, and demand to be treated as you wish to be treated, it's a highly qualified form of submission.

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I’ve broached this subject several times with so called dommes. Even though I have always explicitly stated that I am not interested in anything financial, some still try to demand a tribute, or other such nonsense. My answer has always been, that my submission IS my gift. Some people do not accept a polite “NO”, for an answer. Like someone posted previously, just because I believe my self to be submissive, does not make me stupid, nor does it make me a pussy. I do not wish to waste anybody’s time. I just wish that others would show me the same consideration. I am not one to judge anyone’s particular kink. No one can help what they’re into. What ever floats your boat. I know what I want, and if our wants/needs are not compatible, that is ok too.

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im a straight guy who sought out discipline. I knew i needed it. I also did not want it to be over sexualized and to date I have only subbed to other males. I felt the dynamics would be better suited to my needs. My first time I subbed to a much younger guy. He was very firm and never once wanted sex but he did have me strip completely naked. this for a straight guy was awkward and then i felt super awkward laying across his lap being naked. I knew it was part of it an complied. it was well worth the experience.

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While I don't consider myself submissive, I did start as a spankee. Even as I've started giving the spankings, I still want to be spanked as well. There are aspects of my life where I'm more dominant, obviously including when I'm spanking, and among other roles as well.

There are of course those who don't want anything to do with a submissive male, because of being trained to accept and want toxic masculinity. While I wasn't raised with a lot of the harmful things we've told boys over the generations, some of the bad teachings were given.

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14 hours ago, Domino said:

I’m still trying to decide wether being a sub as a guy is a good thing.

There are a lot of ways to look at this. One is that it's a sign of respect, something our society could use a whole lot more of today. A man who has the ability to humble himself and show this kind of respect has a certain edge over all those who are enslaved by their egos. 

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11 hours ago, Geoffreaux said:

I’ve broached this subject several times with so called dommes. Even though I have always explicitly stated that I am not interested in anything financial, some still try to demand a tribute, or other such nonsense. My answer has always been, that my submission IS my gift. Some people do not accept a polite “NO”, for an answer. Like someone posted previously, just because I believe my self to be submissive, does not make me stupid, nor does it make me a pussy. I do not wish to waste anybody’s time. I just wish that others would show me the same consideration. I am not one to judge anyone’s particular kink. No one can help what they’re into. What ever floats your boat. I know what I want, and if our wants/needs are not compatible, that is ok too.

I agree - submission is a gift.

I hadn't heard the term FinDom / FinDomme until the topic came up in chat this week. I know there are pro spankers out there, of course, but didn't know this was a kink. There seems to be so many women out there who just want to make money (or receive some other form of tribute) from male subs and spankees - I understand that they are filling a need, but it makes me sad for the male bottoms and subs who want to form a strong relationship that doesn't require a cash outlay each time.

15 hours ago, Domino said:

I’m still trying to decide wether being a  sub as a guy is a good thing.

What is it that you are wrestling with? 

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It's not a question of morality.  There is no right, wrong, good, evil in choosing to be submissive/not submissive. If you are looking for social approval from your friends/peers/family, then that's not going to happen. But then, why do you really need it? It's your life, your choice. If it's a question out of desperation of being unable to find a female dominant, you are certainly not alone. If you're worried about putting women "off" by being a submissive, well....they don't know what they are missing out on! 

Perhaps it could be more helpful for us if you elaborate your question. I'm really flying blind here with what you were looking inputs on. 

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