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Humbling, embarrassment, humiliation


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OTK,

Agree in full, as one builds the embarrassment and release that the awaiting spankee craves.

Take your time and remember the build up to that wanted spanking is so important to your partner. I suspect that she has allowed the thoughts of being positioned over a firm skilled lap for the long over due adult spanking, more time than she might count. So indulge her pleasure, take your time, allow her the pleasure of drinking in the scenario, and of course when the moment is correct deliver the desired spanking well.

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On 7/22/2022 at 1:01 PM, Dunelmman said:

A good scolding and the errors of her way pointed out to her in advance would have her in floods of tears accepting her faults long before she went over my lap. I don’t believe it’s about embarrassment, and Never should be about humiliation, but an effective spanking starts and ends on the spankee accepting the spanking is justified even in a consensual or role play situation.

YES. This is so true. I have never typically been much of a crier during spankings (not a challenge!) but the few times it has happened were almost entirely from the scolding aspect of it. When THAT was real, everything else has 10x the impact. 

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After a bit of though and going through some memories of being embarrassed about a spanking, I think it comes down to two specific things my wife can do to make my face go the colour my backside would become or had been. The first is if she mentions a spanking she intends to give me or has given me, while in the presence of another person. This can quickly bring a glow to my face and silence me just as quick. The other is when I'm made to masturbate before a serious punishment spanking while she watches.

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In no particular order:

- reflection time after a spanking.

- the one occasion when I had to lower my punishment shorts to reveal only a thong to my regular ER (and get spanked wearing only the thong) who is a male friend and had never seen me in underwear before (never again).

- every time I come out from my room after getting changed for a spanking and walk into face my friend to get punished.

- getting spanked OTK by my other (female) ER for the first time.

- her giving me my first ever bare bottom spanking / having to lower my underwear for that (very recently).

- sitting writing lines.

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Sharing a technique which has been effective for a select few spankee, who indeed crave the embarrassment aspect of a correction.

After the physical correction has concluded, have the freshly spanked soul activate their camera phone, then hand it to you.  Once in hand take a snap shot of the corrected individual’s bottom. Return the phone to the owner and instruct her to send you a note in two days.  The note is to be composed after reviewing the snapshot, allowing her memory to recall the actual spanking, and reflecting on what was the root cause driving the need for such an embarrassing adult olde fashion spanking.

 

Personal comment:

• Such notes have strength relationships 

 

Cheers

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  • 2 weeks later...

Humbling is admitting to another person I want/need a spanking. Embarrassing is having to undress to get it. Humiliating is having an erection that leaves no doubt the process excites me. Double humiliation is being required to “get rid of it” before the session continues. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

It's embarrassing when the pants get pulled down and they see my bare butt. It fades a bit during the spanking. Comes back strong for me if my cheeks get rubbed after a spanking or I walk by a mirror with my butt still bare and my spanker sees how red it is along with me, and especially if I have to stand in the corner with my pants still pulled down.

I try to pull those elements out of people I spank too. Never humiliate people though or want anything to do with it when I'm getting a spanking.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I have had enemas and forced infantilism added as additional punishment, proof of trust, surrendering control, and the latter as a way to force my mind into a necessary reboot before it melts down and make me allow someone to take care of and care for me, the two have alternatively been used for punishment specifically for not taking care of myself (the former for dehydration and holistic consequences-migraines, tachy heart, etc. The latter for not adhering to a healthy sleep schedule, irregular hygiene, etc.) 

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I can say that the one time I got called out of class in school to get paddled, I was embarrassed to come back into the classroom and face my classmates.  As an adult, all of my spankings have been either self administered or given by someone that I was in an intimate relationship with.  There was no embarrassment.  There was then and even now with self spankings, a lot of anxiety from the time I learned I was to be spanked and when it occurred.  This is an important aspect in the build up to my punishment.  

 

 

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On 7/21/2022 at 11:50 PM, badbackside said:

Not really interested in adjudicating the differences between these words, lets just pretend for this they are all synonymous. What do spankees find most humiliating during a spanking or spanking session

It genuinely depends. Corner time can humble me, particularly if bare bottomed, but put me in the corner with clothing on and hands behind my back and the full brat comes out. 
 

I know you said you weren’t looking to distinguish, but I think there’s a huge difference between humbling and humiliating. I won’t tolerate humiliation (mocking me, calling me filthy names, etc) but humbling can take something as simple as calling me a naughty girl. 
 

When not a “fun” spanking, I find all of the spanking aspect embarrassing, to a degree. I’m embarrassed I’ve gotten myself to the point where I need and deserve a spanking, embarrassed I’m bottom up and no longer in control, and genuinely humbled by the person who can take me in hand in such a way. 

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