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In most relationships that involves spanking there is a set of rules either written or implied. As a spanker do you require your spankee to report the misdeeds. What are the consequences if they do report and what happens if the spankee does not report and you find out. Spankees do you report when you are breaking a rule ? Have you ever been caught doing something you have not reported? I personally have a set of rules we have established between myself and my husband. I will tell later when my husband did not report and what happened after not self reporting. I feel self reporting is important between spanker and spankee.    Ms L

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Definitely, self reporting is very important for me. Especially concerning a spankee who's not a part of my personal life. My wife though, not entirely as much since I can keep an eye on her almost 100% of the time, and she usually volunteers her misdeeds. Though, as far as consequences for not reporting? An attempt at privilege removal, or additional time-out time or extra swats.

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It is a mix for us.

We have a set number of questions she   asks me every night.  I report truthfully on those question.  One question is "is there anything else".  That is where I report on any non-specifics.

However, there are a range of things that she can ask or just execute outside of non reporting.

Every couple has to find thier own way.  I would not volunteer much I formation.  But in direct response to her questions it is not 100% self reporting just 50/50.

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I have always used a set of rules and spankees have been required to report. They are not my rules, they are agreed-upon rules, based upon what the EE is trying to accomplish. There are multiple ways that compliance or non-compliance can be reported with apps that can be used to simplify things. Honesty and  timely reporting are critical to the integrity of any plan. Without those, there is really no point in having the plan. 

If I were to catch an EE not being honest I would be disappointed and I would administer discipline. If it were to become a pattern, I would question the value of the relationship. I realize that may be unrealistic with married couples so, in that case, I think the consequences should be made memorable enough to discourage any future occurrences.

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1 hour ago, Spanknutt said:

I have always used a set of rules and spankees have been required to report. They are not my rules, they are agreed-upon rules, based upon what the EE is trying to accomplish. There are multiple ways that compliance or non-compliance can be reported with apps that can be used to simplify things. Honesty and  timely reporting are critical to the integrity of any plan. Without those, there is really no point in having the plan. 

If I were to catch an EE not being honest I would be disappointed and I would administer discipline. If it were to become a pattern, I would question the value of the relationship. I realize that may be unrealistic with married couples so, in that case, I think the consequences should be made memorable enough to discourage any future occurrences.

As usual your posts are precise and you gave a well thought answer. Being married and HOH/ Spanker consequences for non reporting should be memorable and should discourage future occurrences. After I receive more responses I will explain how I dealt with my husband in a situation recently. I like your perspective being a disciplinarian and I am the same in my HoH. Before we were married l set the rules and my boyfriend now husband agreed to those rules. Self reporting shows trust between a married couple such as ourselves and is important. Good Post Spanknutt.                 MS L

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5 hours ago, Spankingmyhuby said:

As usual your posts are precise and you gave a well thought answer. Being married and HOH/ Spanker consequences for non reporting should be memorable and should discourage future occurrences. After I receive more responses I will explain how I dealt with my husband in a situation recently. I like your perspective being a disciplinarian and I am the same in my HoH. Before we were married l set the rules and my boyfriend now husband agreed to those rules. Self reporting shows trust between a married couple such as ourselves and is important. Good Post Spanknutt.                 MS L

If a set of rules are in place that require self reporting of one's behavior, the consequences for not following through should be severe.  The spankee should know what the consequences are for failing to report. If anything that should be motivation enough to be truthful. 

It should  always be far worse to not report bad behavior than to report it honestly. 

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2 hours ago, Spank_that_ass said:

If a set of rules are in place that require self reporting of one's behavior, the consequences for not following through should be severe.  The spankee should know what the consequences are for failing to report. If anything that should be motivation enough to be truthful. 

It should  always be far worse to not report bad behavior than to report it honestly. 

While I agree, I have found that in a healthy spanking relationship the EE often hates disappointing the ER even more than the discipline itself so usually, if they try to get away with something they end up confessing eventually because of the guilt. 

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We have a list of offenses, each with its own 3 level prescribed punishment.   I have learned, the hard way, that self-reporting is the way to go.  Self-reporting is looked on favorably by most spankers.  Not that punishments are waived a lot and that is not the reason to self report, but I feel it puts the EE in a better light.  Most times I am still spanked after ratting on myself, but it is far better than trying to hide the transgression.  Somehow, they always find out and then the punishment is much worse.... at least it is here in our FLR.

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as a person who does strictly online discipline for self spankers or to guide a couple, self reporting is of utmost importance. if Ifine out soemthing went unreported there  is always an additional penalty given.

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I have learned the hard way that self reporting is my best option. My wife highly suspects my misbehavior or actually has evidence of my wrongdoing. If I don't come clean or mislead, the consequences are significant. While I will still be punished after self reporting, it will be less harsh for sure. 

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47 minutes ago, NorCalMan said:

I have learned the hard way that self reporting is my best option. My wife highly suspects my misbehavior or actually has evidence of my wrongdoing. If I don't come clean or mislead, the consequences are significant. While I will still be punished after self reporting, it will be less harsh for sure. 

Yes self reporting is very important in a marriage. Before we were married I made the rules and my husband agreed to these rules. Breaking a rule is a punishment spanking not reporting has much severer consequences. Under writing I will talk about what those consequences were for my husband recently. I am hoping that more wives will hold their husbands accountable for not self reporting. Good Post l am glad your wife requires self reporting. Is your wife HoH like myself ? Are your rules written or implied?                                        MS L.

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I am looking forward to hearing how you dealt with your husband. You said you would explain it when you had received more responses, this post is adding one more to the total.

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 5/26/2022 at 4:52 PM, NorCalMan said:

I have learned the hard way that self reporting is my best option. My wife highly suspects my misbehavior or actually has evidence of my wrongdoing. If I don't come clean or mislead, the consequences are significant. While I will still be punished after self reporting, it will be less harsh for sure. 

Confessing once confronted is one thing, but self-reporting? As in tattling on myself to get spanked? That's nuts! Because I'm a spanko, I'm glad to have a wife who spanks me when I deserve it. I enjoy the side-effects and will fondly recall the most severe spanking from a distance of time. But the spankings I get are punishment spankings, and are very unpleasant. I try to avoid them, and they have the intended deterrent effect on deliberate misbehavior. If I haven't been spanked in a while, I may get careless, or even flirt with getting spanked, but usually if I earn a spanking it's by acting impulsively or thoughtlessly. Often I don't realize what I have done until confronted, or at least until she asks a pointed question that makes me realize I should've known better. In fact "You should've known better" are the words I most frequently hear when the paddle or hairbrush comes out and my pants are pulled down. Of course, I occasionally do something I know I'll be spanked for because I don't think she will find out, and frequently I will realize I've done something impulsively or thoughtlessly that I'll be spanked for if she finds out. Then I try to conceal the evidence, or better yet, take action to prevent or reduce the effects of my slip-up. Only if I honestly misread a situation would I bring it to her attention, confessing and apologizing in hopes of avoiding a spanking. Once confronted with a slip-up, and she doesn't miss much despite my efforts, I will immediately confess and apologize, but we both know if I "should've known better" I'm still going to be spanked! And I long ago learned the hard way that any attempt to get out of it means a much more severe spanking! 

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Honesty is important in how I feel about myself as a person AND important in my dynamic. I would additionally feel overwhelming guilt if I did not confess. We use apps and/or a spreadsheet along with me reporting honestly and in a timely manner when I slip up. My conscience demands it anyway.

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