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A delicate subject


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A painful spanking can often lead to the participant writhing and squirming. This action can sometimes reveal other more er … intimate parts of the female anatomy than just a bare backside.

So, here’s a question for the for the girls. For the sake of modesty do you take care to retain a position that doesn’t display more than the target area when presenting your bare-bottom for a spanking?

Comments from the guys are also welcome.

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In my experience, once the spanking starts, the EE kind of forgets about modesty and is more concerned about how much it hurts. And if they are that modest, they normally don't put themselves into that situation in the first place. I'm not speaking about all EEs, but in general.

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At least some of a female's vulva will be exposed for a truly bare bottom spanking. The level of exposure depends on too many variables to count. Having said that, I am not very concerned about my own modesty when getting a spanking, which is likely a hold over from being spanked as a child.

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I think it just depends on the woman being spanked.  I had one woman I spanked years ago, a college student, who was so anxious to be spanked she took her own panties down before she went over my lap.

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I'm sure it varies among spankees but I have to say it never really seems to be an issue these days for me. In years past like 15+ years ago, when I was attending fairly regular parties there were always some spankees who preferred to keep some form of clothing coverage. Which is perfectly reasonable under any circumstances, but particularly when one is playing with multiple and/or new partner(s). I don't go to parties anymore, and I don't play with casual acquaintances, so by the time things have progressed to the physical contact stage my current play partners and I tend to be quite comfortable with each other and modesty isn't an issue. I tend to stick with partners who really, reeeeaaally enjoy spanking though, (sometimes even as much as I do!😉) and whether there's a sexual/sensual component or whether its simply to enjoy the sensation for what it is, or stress relief, or whatever; modesty doesn't seem to enter into it anymore. Obviously ymmv. 

Final caveat: I would never want a partner to feel mentally or emotionally uncomfortable before during or after a session. So although this hasn't been my experience in recent memory, if a spankee feels more secure remaining partially or fully clothed then they will hopefully communicate that with their partner. Talk, talk, talk it out. Again, my 2 cents. 

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5 minutes ago, DiscreetSpanko8 said:

By the time things have progressed to the physical contact stage my current play partners and I tend to be quite comfortable with each other and modesty isn't an issue. 

If a spankee feels more secure remaining partially or fully clothed then they will hopefully communicate that with their partner. Talk, talk, talk it out. 

Yes to both of these. Get to know each other and communicate. It makes everything more enjoyable.

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On 1/14/2022 at 8:49 PM, DiscreetSpanko8 said:

....I would never want a partner to feel mentally or emotionally uncomfortable before during or after a session. So although this hasn't been my experience in recent memory, if a spankee feels more secure remaining partially or fully clothed then they will hopefully communicate that with their partner. Talk, talk, talk it out. 

Nicely said. I agree. Some of us are naturally modest, and it just is what it is. I give men the same respect, locking eyes with them from the moment their undies come down, so that they can relax and not feel self-conscious about their genitals being seen. All a woman has to do to remain modest is wear a tunic or dress to shield her front, and keep her legs together during the spanking. I've made many teasing remarks that a spanking isn't a spanking unless given on the bare. But truly, if someone needs a layer of clothing to increase their comfort level, I think this should be respected. 

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I always wore a thong when meeting new partners in college. Being married, if I met someone in real life now, I would request the same. I totally understand needing to see the bottom, especially because I am so light skinned. I know some guys think it’s not a spanking without that level of embarrassment and it’s a deal breaker for them. That’s fine. I don’t even wear a bikini. I assure you I’m plenty embarrassed with a thong on…

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On 1/21/2022 at 12:53 PM, Jaclyn said:

I always wore a thong when meeting new partners in college. Being married, if I met someone in real life now, I would request the same. I totally understand needing to see the bottom, especially because I am so light skinned. I know some guys think it’s not a spanking without that level of embarrassment and it’s a deal breaker for them. That’s fine. I don’t even wear a bikini. I assure you I’m plenty embarrassed with a thong on…

I fully agree; communication is king, and a thong is a great tool for those who are comfortable with them. 

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I am one of those who is very modest and even in a committed relationship would not want to be fully nude. At the same time, over panties is not the same. A thong would be my go to compromise.

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I am quite modest, but a spanking over panties would not have the same import. There is something critical to me about the embarrassment of panties coming down, even if I know what will be seen. It's a love/hate kinda thing.

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I've only been spanked within a sexual relationship, so it didn't matter if he saw all of me. If I were doing platonic sexual play, I'm not entirely sure how I'd feel about it, but I know I prefer to be spanked bare bottom, and I think that, if I were comfortable enough with someone to let them spank me, much less spank me bare, I wouldn't be that concerned about them seeing my genitals. It wouldn't be the main display, of course, but if they caught an accidental glimpse, it would be no big deal.

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4 hours ago, Bramblewine said:

I've only been spanked within a sexual relationship, so it didn't matter if he saw all of me. If I were doing platonic sexual play, I'm not entirely sure how I'd feel about it, but I know I prefer to be spanked bare bottom, and I think that, if I were comfortable enough with someone to let them spank me, much less spank me bare, I wouldn't be that concerned about them seeing my genitals. It wouldn't be the main display, of course, but if they caught an accidental glimpse, it would be no big deal.

Platonic *spanking* play, not sexual play!

Wish we had an edit option.

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 1/26/2022 at 7:53 PM, OhRedhead said:

I am quite modest, but a spanking over panties would not have the same import. There is something critical to me about the embarrassment of panties coming down, even if I know what will be seen. It's a love/hate kinda thing.

My Wife takes my pants down except for when she occasionally orders me to do it for her. She could care less about my modesty, that is for sure! Her sole objective is to turn me over her knee and spank my bare bottom the color of cherries with a hairbrush as she sits sternly in a straight-backed chair. 🪑 (🔴l🔴) 😈

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On 1/26/2022 at 7:53 PM, OhRedhead said:

I am quite modest, but a spanking over panties would not have the same import. There is something critical to me about the embarrassment of panties coming down, even if I know what will be seen. It's a love/hate kinda thing.

Exactly! Not that I personally want to flash my privates, but the taking panties down is a big part of the whole experience. And yes, once the pain starts escalating, you don’t really care anymore!

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At the risk of repeating what other people have said, I’ll throw in my two cents. 

As a married and generally modest woman, the only person allowed to see the goods is my husband. So I agree with the ladies who say that’s why thongs exist. 
 

I know there’s a certain tension and mystique to the moment the panties come down, but one can always replicate that with cotton full-coverage undies over the thong. Just pull those down to reveal the cheeks, but the other stuff stays covered. 

 

Also, at the risk of vulgarity, not all vulvas are created equal. Some ladies can squirm quite a bit and reveal very little, while other ladies merely need to cough a little too hard to show more than they may have bargained for. So what seems modest enough for one might not be modest enough for another. In which case, there are always backless panties. 

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  • 1 month later...

I always make it quite clear that whether or not "On the Bare " is optional & has never been an issue with me. It is a "come as you are" event. And I will make the necessary adjustments to "get to the bottom of it" regardless of whether Bare or not. However in the interest of "quality assurance & damage control" it is essential that the rear end is subject to examination & inspection, both during as well as afterwards simply so that the "job has been taken care & the issue has been presumed as resolved" & has been noted as within all physical limits.

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Context matters. Prior communication matters. And the ‘ee is in control on this issue.

However, in the context of a date with a stranger, my thoughts are:

a.      If the purpose is pleasure, then this matter can easily be incorporated into the arranged scene. So, for example, if a headwaiter is spanking a waitress for spilling water on a customer, then for her to be wearing a thong would be very natural.  If, on the other hand, the set-up is a father spanking his daughter for spying on her male cousin in the shower, then the opposite would be true.

b.      If the purpose is disciplinary, then, bearing in mind my first line, I will do what she wants.  But my preference is to make her bare all.  I am not going to touch her between the legs, or comment on that part of her anatomy, or gaze at it particularly.  But I want her to feel her vulnerability and my total control.  The psychological aspect is exactly why this is a spanking and not a beating.   To me that little strip of cloth, however meaningless it is as a practical matter, is a barrier erected by her which symbolizes an area invulnerable to my authority.  -Ex.

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Like all things it’s going to differ from person to person. 
As a spanker I give all disciplinary spankings on the bare bottom but as a spankee you’re entitled to do what makes you comfortable and stick to your limits. 
If you don’t feel comfortable being completely bare then make sure you find a spanker that respects that and accommodates you. 
 

You’re entitled to your limits whatever they may be and don’t let anybody convince you otherwise. 

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I'm male but I'd think in a good spanking, that might be the least of anyone's concerns during. Perfect example, my house is maybe 3 feet off the road on one side, 10 feet in front, and neighbors are close on the other 2 sides, now I'm sure people have heard they're always out walking in nice weather. One day as she was putting me across her knee it occured to me one of the street side windows maybe 5 feet from us was wide open. I didn't get to say anything but that spanking started and I never thought of it until long after it was over and that time of day, it was heard at the least. So, I'd say protecting certain parts probably if it crosses her mind at all doesn't last long.

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