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For those who relish the 'Embarrassment Aspect' of a Spanking...


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...   please share with us, one (or two or all three!) of the following:

1) What types of things/people/places/words etc... did you experience that caused you the most embarrassment as you were about to be spanked, were being spanked, or in the aftermath of the spanking?

2) What scenarios or aspects (i.e. things/people/places/words..etc...) do you think would cause you the most embarrassment? and/or

3) What were the aspects of a spanking you witnessed or read about that you thought were 'cringe-worthy' or 'exciting' (depending on your perspective) that caused major embarrassment to someone or some group of people (most likely to the person(s) being spanked!)?

 

I'll start out by answering #3. As several of you may know, I once accidentally walked in on a mom giving her very pretty daughter, a high-school senior who I had a huge crush on, a bare bottom spanking over her knee. I was several years younger than this girl, and when she looked up and saw me standing there wide-eyed watching her being spanked, the look of horror and embarrassment as she turned beet red was priceless and something I'll never forget. I credit that event with being my first spanking experience and what likely sparked my interest in the subject. So its no surprise that for #2 I would put being spanked in front of someone you know (for me someone of the opposite sex), and someone you flirt with or know in a fun-friendship (non-sexual) way. It might also be being spanked in front of someone you really dislike (like a bitchy female neighbor or co-worker who sports an evil ear-to-ear grin as she relishes what she's about to witness), and for women I can imagine that being spanked in front of a female nemesis would be super embarrassing.  For you ladies who may enjoy the thought of seeing a guy embarrassed and spanked, I'm reminded of a few F/M stories where the guy was very embarrassed (and I don't blame him!).. such as 40-ish yr old male boss/business owner being surprised on his birthday with a paddle from his younger all-female staff, and ends up with his pants at his ankles getting a bare bottom birthday spanking from all of them... or a male college senior getting caught by his (platonic) female roommate's mom with a F/M spanking mag and ends up submitting to getting his first-ever spanking over the pretty mom's knee, and in the middle of it, the female roommate and her girlfriend accidentally walk in on them ("OMG Mom what are you doing?!?" giggles the shocked female roommate as she and her girlfriend suppress their giggles and laughter), and the spanking and ensuing cornertime proceeded in full view of the smiling girls.  On that note, I cant imagine doing cornertime with your freshly spanked bottom on full moon display counting down the minutes (which cant pass fast enough) until you are done, and dreading that your spankers girlfriends who are due over any minute, don't suddenly open the door!     And finally on a tamer note (and this has been debated on this site before, but 'bare' with me) to hear my female partner teasingly (and in good fun) tell the pretty female waitress I've been flirting with that I've earned a good 'pants down trip across her knee" when we get home. Shopping with a female friend for a leather belt or a wooden spoon and having her say something witty to the checkout salesgirl that I have a spanking coming when we get home would be right up there too.  Delicious and fun.... no harm done, and would all make for wonderful memories for everyone involved in any of these scenarios....   I bet years down the road even the spankee will see it as such!  Let's hear yours please!   :)

 

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Back in the late 90's I exchanged countless messages (on a spanking website called "Castle Handyman") with a 27 year-old elementary school teacher from Kentucky.  It turns out, every year, her school took an end of the year field trip to Kings Island Amusement Park in Mason, OH.   At the time, my wife and I lived only a few miles south of the park, so she wanted me to spank her when her school group made their annual trip up.  I was running my own business at the time, and had her meet me at my office. This was the first time we had ever met in person.  On the drive to my house, I told her we needed to make a quick stop, and I pulled into a CVS a few miles from home.  The two of us went into the store together.  I still hadn't explained why we had stopped.  I proceeded to take her to the "health and beauty aids" section; more specifically; the hairbrush aisle.  I stopped in front of the hairbrushes, turned to her, and said, "Pick one . . ."  Needless to say, her eyes grew as wide as saucers.  Before she could say anything, I said, "I want you to have a souvenir from your spanking . . . so pick one out."

As you can imagine, her face got a bit flush . . . even more so as she went from brush to brush, discreetly "testing" them in the palm of her hand.  She managed to pick out a wooden "paddle" brush, and then tried to hand it to me.  I didn't take the brush from her because I wanted her to take it through the checkout.  I said, "I'll buy it for you, but I want you to hang on to it."  We then headed to the register.  There was a young lady working at the check-out that was roughly the same age as my school teacher friend.  I didn't say anything that might embarrass either one of them; I just stood behind her while she purchased the hairbrush.  I might be mistaken, but I'm pretty sure her knees were shaking just a bit, lol.  When the transaction was completed, the cashier put the hairbrush in a plastic bag and was about to hand it to my school teacher friend.  I stuck out my hand, saying simply, "Thanks, I'll take that . . ."

A short time later, I put her over my knee and spanked her first by hand, then finished with the hairbrush we had purchased earlier.  She later told me that our little shopping trip was a completely unexpected surprise (and a "hot" one at that, lol).  She came back the following year and I spanked her again.  That was the last time I saw her . . . but my guess is, she still has the hairbrush she picked out that day for her first "real" spanking . . .

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I'm a very modest girl, and growing up at home, spankings were always done on the bare. So besides the physical pain of getting spanked, it was emotionally hard as well because of the shame of being bare. My dad knew of course how modest I was. So he would never just say I was going to get a spanking. It was always "I'm going to blister your bare bottom" or "When we get home, young lady, you're getting your bare bottom spanked." Always had to say the "bare" word to immediately trigger the dread of what was coming, even if it wasn't coming right away.

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I'm a very modest girl, and growing up at home, spankings were always done on the bare. So besides the physical pain of getting spanked, it was emotionally hard as well because of the shame of being bare. My dad knew of course how modest I was. So he would never just say I was going to get a spanking. It was always "I'm going to blister your bare bottom" or "When we get home, young lady, you're getting your bare bottom spanked." Always had to say the "bare" word to immediately trigger the dread of what was coming, even if it wasn't coming right away.

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I love this thread.  This is a huge turn on for me as an "ee". 

For me the biggest embarrassment is either being spanked in front of someone else and having them witness it.  It becomes an embarrassing secret they can bring up anytime in the future, or drop a hint in the middle of some vanilla conversation and it would just turn me bright red.  Or, having someone know I was going to be or had been spanked (even if they didn't see it).  The embarrassment of them knowing it was going to or had happened would kill me (and get me really exited at the same time).

@SpankorBSpanked I think your CVS story is wonderful.  Such a great way to add excitement to the experience.  I'd love for my spanker to do that to me. 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Although the incident I recently shared involved taking the young lady to a CVS to purchase a hairbrush to be spanked with, I think another interesting idea would be to take a spankee to a local grocery store to pick out a "hand" of ginger.  Then, once back at home, have them carefully carve a "finger" of ginger to be used for "figging" them during corner time.  Talk about "hot" . . . Actually, when the spanker heard the spankee "moaning" in the corner, they would know it was time for the spanking to begin.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I also enjoy being spanked in front of others.  A few years ago my girlfriend at  at the time was a firm believer in taking charge and keeping me in my place.  Needless to say I was often bare assed and over her knee.  One day while I was receiving a maintenance spanking I heard the door open downstairs, and I heard her friend Cindy called up to see if my girlfriend was at home. I started to get up assuming the session was cut short due to her friends arrival. I was quietly informed by my girlfriend that the session was over when she said it was over and not before.  She then told Cindy to come up the stairs.  I then was given another 20 whacks while my girlfriends friend watched .  When the session was over I don't know what was redder my ass or my face.  When my girlfriend finished she told Cindy she could have me over her knee if she wished..Cindy declined, taking pity on my red backside. I later found out that the two girls had planned this out.   Apparently Cindy had been skeptical that my girlfriend had taken total control of our relationship and my girlfriend thought that me being completely nude submitting to a spanking would show her friend who was the dominant one.

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  • 1 month later...

Embarrassment.   🙂

• Indeed is an aspect that many a spankee, simply get chills of excitement from

• Example, Last week while enjoying lunch with a mature woman, with whom I had arrangements to spank and enjoy the following occurred.

During our lunch, the server appeared to be curious as to our lunch conversation. The restaurant was not particularly busy so the server’s attention was not intrusive.

Know the wants, needs, and desires of my luncheon guest, I enjoyed watching her reaction, facial flushing, panty damping, and body language. As our server over head the comment, “You have all ready earned yourself a spanking, let’s not force the use of a hairbrush.”

The eye contact between my guest and our server was exceptional.

So my friends in this form, please do not underestimate the embarrassment factor, for those who need to find themselves balanced across a safe and skilled lap to satisfy their personal needs.

 

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  • 1 month later...
  • 1 month later...
  • 3 weeks later...

Do people find that a particular form of embarrassment fades with time, e.g. having one's undergarment removed while facing the spanker becomes just a matter of routine? If so, what have people found helpful in restoring the thrill? -Ex.

Edited by Explorify
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  • 2 weeks later...

I visited a Mistress who had spanked me before, but this time I was accompanied by a girlfriend. I was thrilled and excited she had agreed to come with me as I had never been punished in front of a female witness. I felt sure that it would add to the experience and it certainly did. The first few minutes were spent together with the Mistress discussing what was to follow. I was then sent out of the room, whilst the two women chatted. i could hear them talking about my punishment and felt very humiliated.

When I was called in, my girlfriend was seated at the far end of the room watching intensely. My face was bright red, as I had to stand and be admonished by the Mistress, before I was put over her knee and spanked. I ensured that I kept my eye on my girlfriend whilst I was being punished, her slight smile indicated that she appeared to be enjoying it. I was then caned soundly in front of her. 

Although the drive home was not far, I could hardly wait to arrive home, strip and lay face down on the bed for her to inspect the cane stripes. Prior to this my girlfriend had punished me but not long after I was punished in front of her, she asked to be spanked by me which was a very pleasant surprise. Even better was the fact that she played out the role of disobedient girl superbly. 

 

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For me the embarrassing part is the language my spanker chooses and what he points out about my spanking.

He likes to start my spankings with me next to his side, my panties being lowered for me with my hands behind my back as I am told what a foolish naughty little girl I am and I'm going to spanked. He will lower me over his lap and say things like "how do naughty little girls get spanked?" And expect me to answer "on the bare bottom". I HATE it. With my entire soul. Its foolish and shameful, and embarrasses every last bone in my body. He knows this, and that's exactly why he does it.

During the spanking he likes to comment on different elements and do his best to make my face turn as red as my bottom. "Remind me what im doing. What am I doing? Am I spanking your bottom bright red like a bad little girl? Bad girls get red sore bottoms don't they?" "Look at you kicking your legs like a well-spanked little girl. Are you getting the spanking your deserve? Tell me you deserve a sore red bottom." "I can see your tears but your bottom isn't halfway to red little girl. Tell me out loud you want a redder bottom, and you deserve to be spanked more". None of these questions are allowed to be unanswered. It doesn't matter how many times I've said the words he won't let me get away with not answer his awful questions out loud. He always goes out of his way to make me pick up the panties I kicked off when I was crying and blubbering and put them back on - but only to my knees before he makes me stand in the corner. Then he comments on what a bright red spanked bottom I have. Makes me answer his questions on how I feel with my panties to me knees with a hot sore bottom in the corner, makes me say "I deserve to be have a sore spanked bottom". 

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On 5/21/2022 at 9:14 AM, RedBottomJourny said:

For me the embarrassing part is the language my spanker chooses and what he points out about my spanking.

He likes to start my spankings with me next to his side, my panties being lowered for me with my hands behind my back as I am told what a foolish naughty little girl I am and I'm going to spanked. He will lower me over his lap and say things like "how do naughty little girls get spanked?" And expect me to answer "on the bare bottom". I HATE it. With my entire soul. Its foolish and shameful, and embarrasses every last bone in my body. He knows this, and that's exactly why he does it.

During the spanking he likes to comment on different elements and do his best to make my face turn as red as my bottom. "Remind me what im doing. What am I doing? Am I spanking your bottom bright red like a bad little girl? Bad girls get red sore bottoms don't they?" "Look at you kicking your legs like a well-spanked little girl. Are you getting the spanking your deserve? Tell me you deserve a sore red bottom." "I can see your tears but your bottom isn't halfway to red little girl. Tell me out loud you want a redder bottom, and you deserve to be spanked more". None of these questions are allowed to be unanswered. It doesn't matter how many times I've said the words he won't let me get away with not answer his awful questions out loud. He always goes out of his way to make me pick up the panties I kicked off when I was crying and blubbering and put them back on - but only to my knees before he makes me stand in the corner. Then he comments on what a bright red spanked bottom I have. Makes me answer his questions on how I feel with my panties to me knees with a hot sore bottom in the corner, makes me say "I deserve to be have a sore spanked bottom". 

Great stuff.  I have found that what I say has a much bigger impact than the spanking.  Almost like the spanks are exclamation points to what I say. Thanks for sharing.

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This past February I shared the pleasure I brought to my guest by discreetly allowing our restaurant server to over hear. A softly spoken comment that she had earned a spanking and had best keep her behavior on the mark to avoid a date with a hair brush.

 

Well dear members of this forum, this past Thursday, the woman and I enjoyed the pleasure of a lunch get together.  Our location was the same restaurant as our February get together.

She was so kind to share the excitement of our luncheon was enhanced by her belief that the server remembered our previous visit and that conversational comment she over heard. I will naturally defer to her keen awareness, as she blushed several time as the two made repeated eye contact.

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  • 2 weeks later...

As a spanker, this is the element I most connect with and find most exciting. I don't believe in humiliation though. I think embarrassing your spankee should come from a place of care for them. You want them to feel small and that someone who cares for them is in charge and that they're going to be seen through their transgression and forgiven.

I think it can also create this real connection between spanker and spankee. A lot of embarrassment comes from having a private part of yourself being revealed and being in a vulnerable position. So there's that sharing of a private event together, excluding the rest of the world. (Though it can be nice to mention other people finding out about your bad behavior and spanking and asking: "and what would they think?") And then just the fact that they are taking care of you in an intimate way -- both in the sense of talking to you about a behavioral issue (even if it's a made up one), punishing you, putting you in a humbling position and likely baring your bottom.

It's such a mental/emotional thing.

It's also so fun finding out how people vary in what they find most embarrassing. What phrases can I use to scold and show care that will most hit home? What rituals will cause them to blush? corner time? sending them to their room to wait? how should they be bared? standing or once over my lap? how does their reaction change when I bare them myself vs. telling them to do it and just sitting their watching? making them say why they're being spanked aloud? making them ask for the spanking? or no words at all -- just a look. just pointing for them to get in position. and what position works best? and are there additional punishment elements to add to the embarrassment? what else will push their buttons?

so many questions! it's fun to explore. 🙂

Edited by Merc
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Oh most definitely, it is not the being spanked but the humiliation.

I stand before her accused of some misdemeanour or other and from the moment she first speaks I know I shall be spanked, to add to my embarrassment there are several of her friends, they seem to know what is about to happen as well and are taking seats to watch the show.

I know she will pull down my underpants and start with a slow careful spread of blows, then she will part my legs a little to add to my humiliation. What follows will get harder and different implements will be used until I start to cry out and that is when she will ask her friends if they want to spank me as well. The tears start to well up in my eyes.

It may be an hour or more before I am sent to stand by the stairs with my trousers and pants around my ankles, my bottom glowing bright red and my face burning, that is the moment she will ask the other women to decide which is hotter, my bottom or my face and they will come up and touch both to see. I hear them talking behind me about how red my behind is and how flushed are my cheeks, they talk about me as though I am not there and take photographs on their phones to show to other friends. sometimes she will tie my wrists to the Bannister supports and put a spreader between my ankles.

She may well ask her friends to rub cream into my sore bottom but I know it will not be some soothing ointment but that wicked, hot Tiger balm or deep heat and she will make sure that some of it gets "accidentally" on my scrotum and around my anus, the pain is terrible but I can not move. That only adds to the embarrassment as I try and wriggle my bottom to get some relief.

At last, her lady friends depart and I am released from my bonds but not before each one has delivered another stinging blow with a hand, a slipper or a flogger, I hear her promise one of the other women that she can borrow me for a party she is planning, a hen night with 40 to 50 women attending, I say "No, please no!" and get further spanked for my trouble.

Yes, it is the humiliation that I find so painful and yet I seek it still, I wonder when the hen night is, not to long to wait I hope.

me.png

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The two most embarrassing aspects of my early spankings were the feeling of exposure and ritual of making myself bare for the discipline. Lowering my pants was scary, but lowering my underwear left a feeling of butterflies so intense in my stomach that I sometimes felt like my breath had been taken away. Once I was over the knee, or bent over, the awareness of how exposed my intimate parts were filled me with that same sense of butterflies. It didn't go away either, even after my backside was on fire. Even after the spanking my mind mostly drifted to the feeling of helplessness and vulnerability. 

Embarrassment has become a deeply important part of my journey. A thought that comes to my mind often is being taken over a motherly spanker's knee and spanked nude in front of a girl I really like. To lose that sense of macho toughness in front of her and for her to make it clear that she's going to start doing that to me from now on. Another embarrassing thought is a girlfriend spanking me nude in front of her girl friends. Not because I did anything wrong, but to show them my place with her. 

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  • 1 month later...

In the last days of my boarding school, I confronted the new Head (a young nun), I believed that I was old enough to be punished and that she was too young to punish me. She asked the Vicar for help and he decided to give me the belt in front of her. Then I had to endure a second beating with the nun's belt. It was very painful, but more than my buttocks, what hurt me the most was my pride, my vanquished arrogance.

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On 11/30/2021 at 6:30 PM, AllieJane said:

I'm a very modest girl, and growing up at home, spankings were always done on the bare. So besides the physical pain of getting spanked, it was emotionally hard as well because of the shame of being bare. My dad knew of course how modest I was. So he would never just say I was going to get a spanking. It was always "I'm going to blister your bare bottom" or "When we get home, young lady, you're getting your bare bottom spanked." Always had to say the "bare" word to immediately trigger the dread of what was coming, even if it wasn't coming right away.

I can relate to what you are saying. I was also very modest as a child growing up, and in general my Amish upbringing was all about girls and women being modest. Well...my parents were very strict, and so when they administered "hide tannings" as they called them...it was usually in front of our while family...I had a sister and two brothers...and they would "announce" the upcoming event with anything "but" modest language....such as...get in here girl, you are gettin' your bare butt strapped"....or...bend over and take down your britches, I am gonna tan your hide".....I was very embarassed before the actual spanking was administered.

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Excellent thread, BTW. If I may, I will respond to #2....2) What scenarios or aspects (i.e. things/people/places/words..etc...) do you think would cause you the most embarrassment? and/or

I have never experienced this...but I think if I were to be punished by my husband...

in front of a woman I really did not like...as she watched.....a woman who was very mouthy and "better than thou" judgemental to me....I think THAT would be very embarassing and humbling to me. Even worse would be...if he let her punish me too! And of course, there would be the requirement for me to apologize after the punishment...and then restitution in the form of maybe doing her laundry or cleaning her house for a week...something like that. I would really be embarassed by such a scenario.....and glad it has not actually happened to me!

 

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