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Ebb and Flow?


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Hi Friends,

I've been spanking-obsessed for over 40 years-- (Can anyone relate? :D)-- so this kink of mine is not going anywhere. But spanking has, admittedly, taken a back seat for me since I switched careers and have very little time for personal recreation. I've noticed that spanking is no longer at the forefront of my mind, like it was with jobs where I had a healthier work/life balance.

Has anyone else felt this ebb and flow with their spanking interest? And if so, can you identify what caused it?

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I can relate to this. Being very busy with work along with knowing there is little to no chance of me getting or giving a spanking contribute most to an ebb in my spanking interest. It's still on my mind several times a day, but I don't have the time or desire to feed the interest.

I used to think that getting a spanking would help quell my obsession somewhat, but the opposite seems to be true.

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3 hours ago, Chawsee said:

Hi Friends,

I've been spanking-obsessed for over 40 years-- (Can anyone relate? :D)-- so this kink of mine is not going anywhere. But spanking has, admittedly, taken a back seat for me since I switched careers and have very little time for personal recreation. I've noticed that spanking is no longer at the forefront of my mind, like it was with jobs where I had a healthier work/life balance.

Has anyone else felt this ebb and flow with their spanking interest? And if so, can you identify what caused it?

After all the wonderful posts you have shared with us dear Chawsee I find this hard to believe. Figured you would multi-task.

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Spanking is only a part of me and isn't something that has been feasibly present 24/7. No one should shame you for focusing on other aspects of your life. Sometimes I can't get in the scene for months at a time. At times the desires aren't there and other times they are strong but can't have anything done. Because at the end of the day other things have higher priority when it comes to importance of my own health, life, family; and of the other persons. 

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52 minutes ago, Child of Light said:

Spanking is only a part of me and isn't something that has been feasibly present 24/7. No one should shame you for focusing on other aspects of your life. Sometimes I can't get in the scene for months at a time. At times the desires aren't there and other times they are strong but can't have anything done. Because at the end of the day other things have higher priority when it comes to importance of my own health, life, family; and of the other persons. 

Exactly. None of us is the sum of our spanking kink. Real life items such as careers, family and sometimes just our personal hobbies may take precedence over our spanko inclinations. This is all normal, and frankly, it's also a sign of a balanced and healthy mind. 

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5 hours ago, spike said:

After all the wonderful posts you have shared with us dear Chawsee I find this hard to believe. Figured you would multi-task.

Spike, you have any idea how many hours she’s been working?!  Don’t be a smart ass.

I experience ebb and flow too.   When I’m absorbed in a big project or am stressed about something, spanking goes to the back of my mind.  That’s always confused me, since a good spanking is more effective than anything else for relieving my stress.  But I do understand what you mean by ebb and flow. 

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I think most of us experience this ebb and flow. Spanking is a big part of my submissive lifestyle, but health issues, family, work and other things often take precedence.

As a submissive I leave the choice up to my boyfriend. He tends to make better decisions for me than I do.

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I think this is totally normal, and I wish I'd ebb more than I do. When I get busy with work or a writing project, spanking can subside from my thoughts, or if something else is going on my life that takes up emotional energy. So, yes, can totally relate. :)

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Long ago, my wife told me her goal for our marriage, psychologically speaking, was to train me to think of myself as perpetually turned over her knee with my pants down. For both of us, it is a cherished state of mind. To be sure, her goal has been achieved. Naturally, I would love to have actual spankings happen more often. A lot more often, actually. Nevertheless, I am grateful whenever it happens. 
 

Gary

DB5F1246-4BF6-4059-835D-9BC63A64933E.jpeg

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I would say though it is still ideal to maintain a sane and adaptive work-life balance.   It's certainly not healthy to remain so engrossed in work that you don't have a minute to yourself.    40 or 50 hours per week (in a just and sane world) should  be more than enough time to sacrifice in order to make a living.   I still have yet to hear anyone on their death bed bemoaning the fact they didn’t spend more time in the office!!! ?

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Working at a hotel does make it difficult to arrange for spankings, either as the ER or the EE. Though my schedule has been consistently mostly evenings for a while now, so that at least gives me a baseline. That said, I do have a lot of other things I need or want to do, so despite spanking being a strong kink, I need to work on those things as well. My goals aren't going to get achieved if I don't work on them. Although I little extra help from a spanking might get me a bit more focused on the more important ones.

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15 hours ago, AfterGeometry said:

I would say though it is still ideal to maintain a sane and adaptive work-life balance.   It's certainly not healthy to remain so engrossed in work that you don't have a minute to yourself.    40 or 50 hours per week (in a just and sane world) should  be more than enough time to sacrifice in order to make a living.   I still have yet to hear anyone on their death bed bemoaning the fact they didn’t spend more time in the office!!! ?

Exactly.  That’s why I’ve been worrying about Chawsee.  ?

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On 10/26/2021 at 7:00 AM, AfterGeometry said:

I would say though it is still ideal to maintain a sane and adaptive work-life balance.   It's certainly not healthy to remain so engrossed in work that you don't have a minute to yourself.    40 or 50 hours per week (in a just and sane world) should  be more than enough time to sacrifice in order to make a living.   I still have yet to hear anyone on their death bed bemoaning the fact they didn’t spend more time in the office!!! ?

I agree with this. I took a county position, not realizing that they've been short-handed for over a year now, so everyone in my department has been working a gruelling schedule to keep all the shifts covered. They've also lost several good employees because of it. And because the county is SO slow about hiring new people, this is unlikely to change anytime soon. But I'm already searching other jobs... and other counties. ;) 

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  • 3 weeks later...

I feel like I'm a Spanko for a week every couple of months and then just live my normal life outside of that. That's why I disappear from this site for long periods and then come bombard everyone with my wisdom all at once. ? I have noticed that the more I lean into it, the longer I stay interested so I imagine if I were in a relationship it would be more steady. 

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