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Spanking and racism


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As someone who has been a lifelong spanko, one of the things I've noticed is that the spanking lifestyle is overwhelmingly white. Has anyone else ever stopped for a moment to think about or consider this? Every single person I've talked to on here - white. Every single spanko I've ever met in real life - white. I know this sounds silly, but this is a common problem across all lifestyles and institutions. So, here's the question I'd like to raise. Is spanking a racist lifestyle? And what can we do to make it less white?

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I have spanked one black person. Recently he posted a topic seeking a spanker. While I don't know what it's like, I know there is a lot of ingrained racism in the US, especially toward blacks. That said, yes, the majority of people I've spanked or been spanked by have been white.

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Perhaps that is true for you, but for me I have met and known spankos of several different races and must say I felt the least amount of racism present than in most other groups of people.  I have been spanked by and spanked several black, Indian and Asian ladies with no apparent factor of race involved.

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Lol, come on!! Let's leave the deeply entrenched and explicitly inhumane term out of this lifestyle. I see your location is listed as US. You live in a white majority country and you are obviously going to meet more white spankos than black. That's just probability and it doesn't speak to the "racism in spanking". 

Spanking is not a racist lifestyle. It's just a kink/fetish lifestyle. And the question, "What can we do to make it less white" is just wrong, even if it is silly. If you had asked "What can we do to make it more equal", I might've had a good laugh and it would've amused me.  

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I hadn’t spanked anyone but white women when I started here but now have spanked two black women, an Asian, and a Hispanic. 
 

I think that’s largely because I’ve lived in largely white places.  That’s changing without me moving and that’s a good thing. 

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Interesting. I’d have no problem with picking an HOH that was a different race than me or being friends with DD couples (or other friends) of different races either. I don’t think race makes much a difference at all here on SN either. Or at least, I haven’t seen anything racially focused. Maybe it’s different in private messages?

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20 minutes ago, boy_otk said:

Lol, come on!! Let's leave the deeply entrenched and explicitly inhumane term out of this lifestyle. I see your location is listed as US. You live in a white majority country and you are obviously going to meet more white spankos than black. That's just probability and it doesn't speak to the "racism in spanking". 

Spanking is not a racist lifestyle. It's just a kink/fetish lifestyle. And the question, "What can we do to make it less white" is just wrong, even if it is silly. If you had asked "What can we do to make it more equal", I might've had a good laugh and it would've amused me.  

Besides people equating haven played with PoC as an indication that there is no racism within the the Kink Community and I stress COMMUNITY.  The note that "Spanking is not a racist lifestyle. It's just a kink/fetish lifestyle."  is simplistic at best and in my mind uninformed.  The act of participating in spanking is different than participating in the community.  Within any community the same conditions exist here as it does outside. And studies point out that in focused communities things like racism are exponentially larger % wise, because the need to control is inherently larger and required to those who hold the keys to access.  When I started in this Spanking Community where I now live I can tell you in no uncertain terms that racism played a part in the community being closed to me and the examples were overt not covert.  That Women would play with me privately but not at an event was prevalent.  If that is not your experience I say very cool for you.  But that doesn't mean that racism doesn't exist.  

To your other simplistic statement,   " You live in a white majority country and you are obviously going to meet more white spankos than black."  That's like an employer who says we don't have as many Black employees as whites because there simply are more Whites than Blacks.  

I found my way into the Spanking Community not because they opened their arms to me, but because IU created my own successful events, parties and munches and became a known educator because I wasn't waiting for permission to come in.  And in the 100's of events, munches and classes I have been responsible the spanking community was not supportive in any way.  

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Interesting. I’d have no problem with picking an HOH that was a different race than me or being friends with DD couples (or other friends) of different races either. I don’t think race makes much a difference at all here on SN either. Or at least, I haven’t seen anything racially focused. Maybe it’s different in private messages?

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27 minutes ago, F/m_Spanking_only said:

This is what I don’t understand. Ok…so the solution to racism (which does exist and is an issue, yes) is to flip it and be racist towards whites? Because “make it less white” sounds like just that.

That's not the point. There is no such thing as racism against white people, as white people already enjoy a life of priviledge. This is more about creating conditions that allow people of color to feel included and not threatened.

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2 minutes ago, VanillaProblems said:

That's not the point. There is no such thing as racism against white people, as white people already enjoy a life of priviledge. This is more about creating conditions that allow people of color to feel included and not threatened.

I have a question @VanillaProblems are you White?  Just asking to help me understand your position

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57 minutes ago, CaliSpanker53 said:

The act of participating in spanking is different than participating in the community.  Within any community the same conditions exist here as it does outside. And studies point out that in focused communities things like racism are exponentially larger % wise, because the need to control is inherently larger and required to those who hold the keys to access.  When I started in this Spanking Community where I now live I can tell you in no uncertain terms that racism played a part in the community being closed to me and the examples were overt not covert.  That Women would play with me privately but not at an event was prevalent.  If that is not your experience I say very cool for you.  But that doesn't mean that racism doesn't exist.  

I got no experience of any events or anything related to spanking, I'm still a novice. Your experience has been that some women play with you privately but not publicly at events. Why do you even play with such women who choose not to play with you in public solely because of race? (If you  didn't, ignore that).I was in no way referring to a "Spanking community". It goes without saying that in any given community, there is bound to be biases, discrimination and other such societal idiocy .  Spanking  as a stand alone activity, is a kink. As long as racism exists in any given community, a "spanking community" would be no different. The racism that you have faced within the spanking community is present in the society at large and it's not specific to our activity. 

 

1 hour ago, CaliSpanker53 said:

To your other simplistic statement,   " You live in a white majority country and you are obviously going to meet more white spankos than black."  That's like an employer who says we don't have as many Black employees as whites because there simply are more Whites than Blacks.  

I don't understand, really. I live in India. If someone was saying that they don't find any white spankos here, that would be stupid. There are not a lot of white people here, so how would they find white spankos? Your comparison with an Employer also doesn't make any sense to me. Ideally, an employer is supposed to take employees based on the skill set and talent of a prospective candidate. Depending upon the location and the diversity of population specific to that area, the chances of hiring a white/black employee could be 50/50 or vary drastically in  favour of one. One can't live in a white populated country and hope to meet the significant amount of black spankos which is comparable to their white counterparts. Add to this, the racism that you mentioned renders one is even less likely  to meet a black spanko.

My only issue was when the author of the topic mentioned how to make spanking lifestyle less white. That is not the point of voice against racism. It's not about making less white, it's about equality irrespective of colour.

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3 minutes ago, boy_otk said:

 

My only issue was when the author of the topic mentioned how to make spanking lifestyle less white. That is not the point of voice against racism. It's not about making less white, it's about equality irrespective of colour.

@boy_otkThis gave me a better understanding of the point you were making.  

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I don't think that most people who are into spanking are racist. I think that there are more white people into spanking simply because it was more popular with white people as a corporal punishment in the past. For example: It was more popular in the UK than it might have been in Eastern Europe ( I live there so I know that) so there are simply less Eastern europeans into spanking just because it's not popular, not because the community is toxic.

Also stuff as kink shaming might have an impact on this, in some countryes people are judged more so they tend to hide there desires ( I live in a community where this is frequent, I know how it can change someone).

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1 hour ago, VanillaProblems said:

That's not the point. There is no such thing as racism against white people, as white people already enjoy a life of priviledge. This is more about creating conditions that allow people of color to feel included and not threatened.

It's open to them as well so long as they are one, of a legal age, and two, they consent to it. 

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How can we make spanking “less white”?   This argument is ludicrous.  I’m so sick of this BS all over our country, and now, unfortunately in our spanking community, of PoC screaming “racism!” any time they feel they’re in the minority.  According to the U.S. Census, as of 2019, whites numbered 236,575,401, or 72.0% of the population.  So why are we expected to make everything “less white” to appease the other 28%?!  We can all agree that there are higher percentages of other races in the country in 2021 than there was even two years ago, and in some areas, whites are the minority.  But I’m getting off track now.

Look, SN is a pretty welcoming place.  If someone is treating you in a racist manner, take it to the moderators, because that conduct isn’t tolerated.  But don’t harp on people because they don’t happen to play with more PoC.  That’s their business and they shouldn’t be harped on about it.  Finding a good spanking partner is HARD!  It’s hard for all of us.  It’s like finding a needle in a haystack no matter who you are.  

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I have a fair few Black British friends both from West Indian, African and mixed race/ Black British backgrounds and a fair few of them have commented and joked about having strict upbringings including corporal punishment. How much of that equates to adult spanking - I don’t know and frankly don’t care. What people do and enjoy is entirely up to them as long as it doesn’t harm others. 
 

 

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2 hours ago, VanillaProblems said:

There is no such thing as racism against white people, as white people already enjoy a life of priviledge. 

I'm a ginger. We're the "whitest" of the white in terms of complexion. If you think we aren't subjected to prejudice, hate speech and bigotry, then you're ignorant. I spent 6 months back in 2014 trying to get Facebook to take down a page which extolled the "virtue" of mass extermination for all gingers. Go ahead, tell me how that's not hate speech, simply because I'm "white." Note that the page didn't call for the extermination of other white people; just the pale and freckled with auburn locks. But that's not targeted hate speech, right? 

To your main question though, yes, spanking communities are predominantly white. In the NYC area, Asians are fairly well represented at many events, as are AA female bottoms. Hispanics are kind of hit or miss and AA male tops are around, but few in number. That is changing though. PoC are becoming more representative around the NYC scene, and in the pre-pandemic age, one of the better quality local spanking events were run buy a team of all AA spankos. 

This disparity is more cultural than any active act of discrimination in my area. The party hosts in and around NYC welcome people from all minority groups, the question is how to attract them. 30 years ago, when everything was pretty much centered around Paddles, it was easy and there were more minorities involved in the scene. What changed about 20 - 25 years ago was that alternate venues opened and were largely promoted via online channels. Due to income discrepancies, whites and Asians were the ones most likely to have access to events promoted via online media. This where the representative demographics changed. As more minorites gained access to online resources in the cable internet age, things changed back. Because they are welcome; the party hosts just miscalculated on their promotional activities as the internet age arose. 

And this is where the "racism" label becomes arbitrary bullshit, because if communities are welcoming to minorities, but minorities aren't buying a ticket at the door, then it's not an issue of racism, it is an issue of building bridges and doing a better job of promoting events. A lot of work went to figuring this out in the NYC area over the past 15 years. Given that one of our better quality spanking parties (as of August 2019) were hosted by an all AA team, I think we know what we're talking about. 

I fully accept that conditions and attitudes outside of the NYC area may differ. I can only comment on the view from my local community. Which is what I have done. 

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Apologies in advance to anyone of Black or Asian background reading this if I’m making presumption as a White person ( and I’m sure we all do that ) but isn’t it somewhat condescending to think of all non-white people as being victims. To me that’s just another form of racism. I can only write from a white British perspective and I’m well aware we have our issues with race relations here as well but at the same time I think posts like this are just designed to bait people and stir things up 

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13 minutes ago, DaChief said:

I'm a ginger. We're the "whitest" of the white in terms of complexion. If you think we aren't subjected to prejudice, hate speech and bigotry, then you're ignorant. I spent 6 months back in 2014 trying to get Facebook to take down a page which extolled the "virtue" of mass extermination for all gingers

I’m gray now ( I was brown haired ) but I put a complaint in about a similar page as well when a ginger haired local kid got beaten up a few years ago.

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Not sure how people are getting this all wrong.  First it is not about White people racist. But to expect there aren't racists within the Spanking Community is Pollyannaish.  The point isn't making the Spanking Community less White or more anything.  It isn't about PoC , like myself, wanting to play with White Women. I play with enough. And yes, White CIS men in the Spanking Community have not always been happy with that.  But this isn't about that either.   For those taking it personal and feel PoC are dragging a conversation like a dead hoarse. And I say this with affectionate respect, get over your selves.  This isn't about that either.

This is about making it more inclusive and it has nothing to do with PoC faces in spanking videos or spotting clubs where we don't always feel accepted, wanted or safe.  You all walk and play in this space as so called guardians.  So understand more inclusive and diverse isn't about making it less White.  Oh and yes, btw the actual 5 of the White race in the U.S. is no longer the dominant %... and in actuality to use that as a basis for an argument happens to be a racist trope meant to deflect, but this is America and you have the right to speak your piece as do PoC like myself.  I've been in love with TTWD and I lived it on the outside for years.  I don't need permission to enjoy it or to be  expected to genuflect for the crack in the door.  

I've only been on SN for a short time and am enjoying the experience because I participate as I choose and the fact the forums give me and others the space to  speak up is a positive. 

All discourse is welcome and anticipated. 

 

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