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Do men and women view spanking differently?


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I don't think there are more men than women who are into spanking. As far as how it is viewed, there are so many differences across the spanko spectrum that not all men view spanking the same and not all women do either - so I don't think it has to do with sex or gender. And I don't think it is possible to give you a real answer to any of these questions. 

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I think there are more men looking for a spanking than there are women willing to spank them. Supply and demand explains the huge number of professional dominatrixes. This is just my opinion/observation. I do not wish to start an argument. 😁

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I have noticed that you can find folks who are interested in the same fetish/kink but you will never find two people who manifest that fetish/kink in the exact same way.  So like our fingerprint, or an iris scan, the way each individual expresses their sexuality via that fetish/kink appears highly individualistic and unique to that person.   

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To answer your questions in an alternate way, if I may...if you're looking for groups of individuals who view spanking in a similar manner the pairings to examine will not be Male vs Female or Straight vs Gay but whether the individuals have generally Dominant or Submissive tendencies.   

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5 hours ago, AfterGeometry said:

To answer your questions in an alternate way, if I may...if you're looking for groups of individuals who view spanking in a similar manner the pairings to examine will not be Male vs Female or Straight vs Gay but whether the individuals have generally Dominant or Submissive tendencies.   

Yes, I think that's true.

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6 hours ago, Geoffreaux said:

I think there are more men looking for a spanking than there are women willing to spank them. Supply and demand explains the huge number of professional dominatrixes. This is just my opinion/observation. I do not wish to start an argument. 😁

I'm a switch.  When I was dating, it was easy to find spankee gals.  Spanker gals were hard to find.

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7 hours ago, Geoffreaux said:

I think there are more men looking for a spanking than there are women willing to spank them. Supply and demand explains the huge number of professional dominatrixes. This is just my opinion/observation. I do not wish to start an argument. 😁

I agree. But that only means more women are bottoms. Because being a bottom is more fun. 

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2 hours ago, rubyredd said:

I agree. But that only means more women are bottoms. Because being a bottom is more fun. 

So you're either saying guys don't know how to have fun or guys are incapable of having fun.  Because if we did, all men would be spankees, right?  I don't think that's what you truly believe.  ;)

 

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5 hours ago, AfterGeometry said:

So you're either saying guys don't know how to have fun or guys are incapable of having fun.  Because if we did, all men would be spankees, right?  I don't think that's what you truly believe.  ;)

 

Well, Tops like to tame all our bratty fun, so... extrapolate what you will from that evidence, Mr. My-NIckname-Includes-Math.

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I do have a question along the lines of this topic.  My spanking fetish is coupled with a powerful attraction to the exquisite curvaceous female derriere.  Is that the case with most male ER's?  Is that the case for most female ER's with respect to spanking masculine behinds?  Do they look even more attractive to you when they are nice and rosy-red from a good spanking?  

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1 hour ago, Rand E said:

I do have a question along the lines of this topic.  My spanking fetish is coupled with a powerful attraction to the exquisite curvaceous female derriere.  Is that the case with most male ER's?  Is that the case for most female ER's with respect to spanking masculine behinds?  Do they look even more attractive to you when they are nice and rosy-red from a good spanking?  

Since unleashing my inner spanko, I find that I am attracted to a cute butt no matter what gender it is attached to.  But it isn't "I want to have sex with that bottom", instead, "Ohh look at that bum... So smackable!" Lol.  

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3 minutes ago, Megthe said:

Since unleashing my inner spanko, I find that I am attracted to a cute butt no matter what gender it is attached to.  But it isn't "I want to have sex with that bottom", instead, "Ohh look at that bum... So smackable!" Lol.  

Exactly!  A cute behind is sexy and all, but it's the spanking thoughts that it triggers that create the attraction.  

In fact, I can cite a perfect demonstration of that phenomenon for me.  You can dial up ubiquitous booty-shaking videos on the internet that feature plump and, for the most part, attractive female bottoms bouncing, clapping, and otherwise vigorously agitated.  Yet, these actually just leave me flat.  All I can think of is:  What a waste of booty and energy.  Spank that lovely big ass already, damn it!

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7 hours ago, Rand E said:

I do have a question along the lines of this topic.  My spanking fetish is coupled with a powerful attraction to the exquisite curvaceous female derriere.  Is that the case with most male ER's?  Is that the case for most female ER's with respect to spanking masculine behinds?  Do they look even more attractive to you when they are nice and rosy-red from a good spanking?  

I feel the same attraction to male behinds, and I am forever evaluating masculine posteriors (and the mind attached to said posteriors) for their spankability. It's the vulnerability of a man's behind over a woman's lap that I appreciate most, more so than the actual rosy-red color. I don't play with anyone creepy or distasteful, but the mental submission of a *good* man is a dear gift.

I do not have any attraction whatsoever to female behinds, and I never have. Some threads and comments here on SN have led me to wonder if bisexuality is indeed more common among spankos? Perhaps those who are attracted to both genders for spanking purposes can shed some light on this, one way or the other? 

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On 5/24/2021 at 7:04 AM, polarbear150 said:

Do men and women view spanking differently?  Are there more men or women spankos?  Do gays and straights view spanking the same?

I was just thinking, the view depends on who is in who's lap.  EE gets a view of the floor.  ER gets a view of the target area, hopefully a nice round bare behind.   :P

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I have tried to make the point that the gift of submission is the gift. It has never been well received, as it’s usually in response to a demand for a tribute. 😁

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45 minutes ago, Chawsee said:

 

I do not have any attraction whatsoever to female behinds, and I never have. Some threads and comments here on SN have led me to wonder if bisexuality is indeed more common among spankos? Perhaps those who are attracted to both genders for spanking purposes can shed some light on this, one way or the other? 

I've shared this elsewhere on the boards: I'm straight when it comes to vanilla sex, but open to spanking partners of any gender. My reasoning, if you ask me to give a reason, is everyone has the right body parts for spanking, but it takes a male body to give me the kind of "normal" sex act I prefer.

But then, who I'm attracted to is a whole other layer. My strongest attraction is to men. Women, I don't think I'm completely unattracted to, necessarily, but it's not such a strong draw. I notice beauty in other women. That doesn't translate to any strong desire for physical activity, but I'm definitely noticing something. Men, I notice when I find them good looking, for sure, but the main thing I'm attracted to is voices. Lots of people have a physical type, certain looks they go for, but for me, there's a certain range of voices that especially attracts me, and it's a masculine range. Looks are secondary.

I don't really have a particular attraction to people's behinds, any gender, but then, I'm a spankee. If I were an -er or a switch, maybe I'd notice behinds a lot more.

I think what it comes down to is, I need to be attracted to someone, through and through, to want to have sex with him (and it is always a him), but with spanking, what I'm attracted to is the act. If I like the way someone spanks, I'd want to play with them even if I didn't feel the kind of attraction to them that I'd expect to have to a sex partner. In that case, we could simply be spanking friends, play partners, nothing more.

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9 hours ago, Chawsee said:

I do not have any attraction whatsoever to female behinds, and I never have. Some threads and comments here on SN have led me to wonder if bisexuality is indeed more common among spankos? Perhaps those who are attracted to both genders for spanking purposes can shed some light on this, one way or the other? 

I have always been attracted to both men and women - and I find people, in general, to be attractive. Honestly, the human form in all of its designs is beautiful and thrilling to me. 

I have been getting spanked (consensual / at my request) since I was 13. I am now 42. In all that time, I had never been spanked by another woman - until last weekend.

I have never been intimate with or had sex with another woman. But, I still consider myself bisexual now.

I have only had erotic spanking that included sex with a few people, but I have been spanked by a couple dozen men over the years. Nearly every spanking in my 20s was for the spanking alone. The vast majority did not include sex. Similarly, the majority of spankings I have received are best classified as fun or funishment. So it isn't about not mixing discipline with pleasure. 

I am a spanko and that is my true sexuality - and spanking is sufficient to meet my needs on its own. However, I still enjoy sex (prefer it as a separate act, though) and will claim bisexuality if I have to choose a classification. 

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7 hours ago, rubyredd said:

I have always been attracted to both men and women - and I find people, in general, to be attractive. Honestly, the human form in all of its designs is beautiful and thrilling to me. 

I have been getting spanked (consensual / at my request) since I was 13. I am now 42. In all that time, I had never been spanked by another woman - until last weekend.

I have never been intimate with or had sex with another woman. But, I still consider myself bisexual now.

I have only had erotic spanking that included sex with a few people, but I have been spanked by a couple dozen men over the years. Nearly every spanking in my 20s was for the spanking alone. The vast majority did not include sex. Similarly, the majority of spankings I have received are best classified as fun or funishment. So it isn't about not mixing discipline with pleasure. 

I am a spanko and that is my true sexuality - and spanking is sufficient to meet my needs on its own. However, I still enjoy sex (prefer it as a separate act, though) and will claim bisexuality if I have to choose a classification. 

I think classifying your secuality as a spanko fits a lot of us here, certainly myself included.  It is why I can spank and be spanked by both genders.

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9 minutes ago, KentuckyGuy said:

I think classifying your secuality as a spanko fits a lot of us here, certainly myself included.  It is why I can spank and be spanked by both genders.

I agree. But I also think there are manynfolks who conflate the two things or assume that spanking - as a sexual fetish - always leads to intercourse. It does for some, of course. But that isn't a given for all of us.

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3 minutes ago, KentuckyGuy said:

It has never been nor ever will be a given for me.

Question... do you find both men and women attractive? What makes you want to spank or be spanked by both men and women. I find it interesting since I want both as ERs, but I also feel physically attracted to both.

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I am only attracted to women, but I will spank men and be spanked by them.  I need to be spanked, but I also enjoy giving them.  And with men, so many do not have anyone to spank them that I started giving them too.

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7 minutes ago, KentuckyGuy said:

I am only attracted to women, but I will spank men and be spanked by them.  I need to be spanked, but I also enjoy giving them.  And with men, so many do not have anyone to spank them that I started giving them too.

It is so hard for male bottoms to find a decent partner. Not everyone wants a Domme (or a Dommehole, for that matter) - some just want a nice woman to spank them. 

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