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Making contact with a Spanko


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So, a female spanko reached out to me on a dating site and said she liked what she saw.

Don't act all surprised, y'all. 😄

She was nice herself. What a welcome relief, she did not look so big, I might get crushed if she fell on me. No, nice. About my size I'd say, maybe less.

Just having her reach out with a nice compliment and the potential start of something fun is like...

  • - Christmas morning when I was ten.
  • - winning a $100 in the Lottery
  • - unexpected tax refund
  • - longed-for promotion out at work
  • -flowers blooming suddenly in front of a window with the Sun steaming in

I was really surprised at my euphoria. Just because she's a spanko? Well, yeah. It seems small, but I guess it's big. Maybe bigger than I even realize.

The thing is - I don't know for sure that I even care about vanilla, like, at all... 🤯

May just be ships passing in the night, but still, nice feeling, even if momentary, that I wanted to share.

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This is a strange world where fantasy and reality overlap, sometimes in beguiling ways. Many of us, particularly men, I think, have a worrying tendency to see what we want to see rather than what is actually there in front of us.

As with all things in the virtual world, it pays to have one's guard in place, but also to be prepared for real surprises! This I know from happy experience.

Decide what we want from our time here and then live by those aims, preferably with all brain cells actively engaged! It's a great place with a potential to be very beneficial from time to time. So nice to hear of the positive things that came from an online encounter.

 

:)

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45 minutes ago, Oldhand said:

This is a strange world where fantasy and reality overlap, sometimes in beguiling ways. Many of us, particularly men, I think, have a worrying tendency to see what we want to see rather than what is actually there in front of us.

As with all things in the virtual world, it pays to have one's guard in place, but also to be prepared for real surprises! This I know from happy experience.

Decide what we want from our time here and then live by those aims, preferably with all brain cells actively engaged! It's a great place with a potential to be very beneficial from time to time. So nice to hear of the positive things that came from an online encounter.

 

:)

Well said, Oldhand. 

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I met my husband on another site.  The ability to have this shared interest and the natural intimate nature of opening up about it was a wonderful jumping off point.  17 years together.

Life is short.  Have fun with it.  You just never know.

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On 4/19/2021 at 8:41 AM, Begin said:

Hello ! How did your encounter go ?

Hi! I thought no-one had replied to my little missive about the Mis(tress) (actually she's a switch) because the board doesn't notify me unless I'm quoted, apparently. I should have checked but... 🤪 sorreee!

So, I unMatched her.  🤷‍♂️

"What!" you say. "Have you lost your mind?"

Well, she was terse. Like one line per. She refused absolutely to call me on my phone. I gave her my # and even explained how to dial anonymously... it is not exactly rocket science, yet her excuse is she doesn't want to give her number out, which I never asked for her number and don't require it. She is one of the many women, the majority, that just want to be penpals, and her conception of the term involves one-liners that are not even interesting. She waited a whole week to reply to me, then asked me yet another mundane question about nothing in particular.

Maybe I shoulda played along or whatever, I'm sure some guys do, but I just view that as a red flag, like she's jerkin' me around, I don't know why, I guess she's bored and just likes texting to guys, and I am probably #23 on a list of guys she's writing. I suspect she's traumatized or jaded or whatever, but there's nothing I can do about that and it's not my fault. I feel jaded myself.

I not only unMatched, I deleted my account...all 500+ questions I answered and the profile I spent hours working on. Just need to take a break from the online dating scene in general.

I'd actually be down for penpals if the correspondence was something interesting... For starters, something other than one-liners, more in-depth and thoughtful. I think OKCupid is particularly prone to one-liner messages, because their chat window on the desktop is so tiny with extremely limited edit capability, i.e. you cannot press Enter or else that Sends the message (which notifies the recipient). Each time you press Enter they get an email notification. I have other problems with the way OKCupid does business...not my favorite site. I felt no regret about deleting my profile.

Their search engine I raved about earlier? Broken. After I raved about it, it quit working entirely. 😆

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