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Spankees before you were married did you let your partner know that spanking was important to you? What was your partner reaction ? Same question to spankees who are dating. What was your partner reaction."As a wife who gives her husband discipline, this was brought up and I knew that I had to give him the spankings he needs. For spankees on this forum the sooner your partner knows the better. Their should have been agreement made early in the relationship.

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I didn’t.  Biggest mistake of my life.  Now that I’m single again, I would find a way to disclose my need for spanking, and wouldn’t settle for a woman who was turned off by it.  

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I only told my wife last year, even though we've been married for 7. Luckily she was totally cool with it, and now I get spanked pretty much whenever I ask.

I agree, the sooner you disclose the better. I wish I had told her years ago.

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I was always open and honest with my partners - when dating. I could never have married a vanilla (no offense to anyone). It would not work for me.  I am pretty bold when it comes to being a spanko and I always have been. 

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1 minute ago, Oracle said:

I only told my wife last year, even though we've been married for 7. Luckily she was totally cool with it, and now I get spanked pretty much whenever I ask.

I agree, the sooner you disclose the better. I wish I had told her years ago.

You were lucky that she was understanding. I hope she is blistering your bottom you men deserve it. Myself and my husband had agreement I was HoH he gets spanked,before we were married we made this agreement. Does your wife have the title of How. Congratulations you had the courage to tell her. I think more members hear should consider it.

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2 minutes ago, rubyredd said:

I was always open and honest with my partners - when dating. I could never have married a vanilla (no offense to anyone). It would not work for me.  I am pretty bold when it comes to being a spanko and I always have been. 

I think more spankees are ashamed of their interest. I think it is even harder for a man. When I found my boyfriend now husband stash of spanking material it open up a new whole light in our relationship.

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21 minutes ago, SpudStateSpanky said:

I didn’t.  Biggest mistake of my life.  Now that I’m single again, I would find a way to disclose my need for spanking, and wouldn’t settle for a woman who was turned off by it.  

You know yourself and you know what you need. Would you make that women HoH and run everything.

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10 minutes ago, Spankingmyhuby said:

You were lucky that she was understanding. I hope she is blistering your bottom you men deserve it. Myself and my husband had agreement I was HoH he gets spanked,before we were married we made this agreement. Does your wife have the title of How. Congratulations you had the courage to tell her. I think more members hear should consider it.

Thank you! Yes I feel very lucky to have an understanding and willing wife, especially considering all the stories I read on here. When I told her, she essentially said "Ok cool. Go get the wooden spoon".

We're not in a DD relationship or anything. For me spanking is for fun, stress relief, or just to fulfill the need. 

I wish I could help everyone come to terms with their fetish so they're able to get what they need.

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I'm not married, I don't even have a girlfriend right now, but I will definitely let someone I'm interested know about both my kinks if I start to feel it could go deeper. Perhaps introduce it by asking about hers.

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I tell everyone about it pretty early on. Usually around 3rd date or thereabouts. Dont want to waste too much time with someone who isnt willing. 

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When my wife and I were dating, I did not know about this part of myself. It was a couple of decades later that this need arose. Telling her was embarrassing and hard, and she was less then enthusiastic about it, even as a birthday spanking. Now I need it for stress relief, and I have to broach the subject again some how.

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My first wife knew of my interest in spanking, but literally called it "perverted". . . After we divorced (due to a myriad of other reasons) and I was dating the woman who I am now married to, I decided that if I was going to enter into another relationship, there weren't going to be any skeletons in my closet as they say.  On a drive from Boston to NYC in 1992 I gathered up my courage I told her of my interest in spanking.  She paused for all of 3 seconds, then said, "Well if it's that important to you, we might as well take care of it at home.  Otherwise, you'll just end up going outside the home."  That's the day I realized that not only was she attractive, she was also a genius . . .

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2 minutes ago, SpankorBSpanked said:

My first wife knew of my interest in spanking, but literally called it "perverted". . . After we divorced (due to a myriad of other reasons) and I was dating the woman who I am now married to, I decided that if I was going to enter into another relationship, there weren't going to be any skeletons in my closet as they say.  On a drive from Boston to NYC in 1992 I gathered up my courage I told her of my interest in spanking.  She paused for all of 3 seconds, then said, "Well if it's that important to you, we might as well take care of it at home.  Otherwise, you'll just end up going outside the home."  That's the day I realized that not only was she attractive, she was also a genius . . .

Your wife is a wise women. More wives should be spanking their husbands . I like having the authority of spanking my husband and being HoH. It is a great opportunity for ladies to take control of their marriage. Do you get maintenance spankings? Is she the boss in the marriage?

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My spankings have been primarily maintenance . . . However, now that we are older she seems much less interested in spanking me.  We sold our house in July (hoping to retire to Europe, which is currently CLOSED; especially to Americans) and now live in a nice apartment, but no longer have the privacy we used to.  She last spanked me in August, shortly after we moved in.  Ironically, as her interest waned, I have indeed been spanked by others "outside the home" . . . the latest a fellow from this very website about a month ago.  She realizes I still need to be spanked, and has no problem with someone else taking care of it.  You have to keep in mind, she only spanked me because she knew I needed it.  It has never been something she "enjoyed" if you will.

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17 hours ago, Spankingmyhuby said:

Spankees before you were married did you let your partner know that spanking was important to you? What was your partner reaction ? Same question to spankees who are dating. What was your partner reaction."As a wife who gives her husband discipline, this was brought up and I knew that I had to give him the spankings he needs. For spankees on this forum the sooner your partner knows the better. Their should have been agreement made early in the relationship.

Yes, Ma’am. Yours truly did not have to wait long nor take the initiative. After flirting with a few women at a party we attended very early in our relationship, my future wife told me to take her home and refused to speak to me as I drove. The next day, she called me up and told me to come over to her place and be quick about it. My mind went straight to make-up sex but once I got there, I was properly scolded instead for my very disrespectful behavior. She accepted my apology then told me to go bring a chair from the kitchen into the living room. “Take your pants down and get over my knee,” she said. After spanking me for several minutes with her hand (a rarity now), I was told that I could expect to be turned over her knee whenever I get out of line. If that wasn’t acceptable, I could climb off her lap, pull up my pants and leave for good. Those were her terms. We have been married for over a quarter-century now, so you know how THAT one turned out. 

Gary

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13 minutes ago, GaryMcKee said:

Yes, Ma’am. Yours truly did not have to wait long nor take the initiative. After flirting with a few women at a party we attended very early in our relationship, my future wife told me to take her home and refused to speak to me as I drove. The next day, she called me up and told me to come over to her place and be quick about it. My mind went straight to make-up sex but once I got there, I was properly scolded instead for my very disrespectful behavior. She accepted my apology then told me to go bring a chair from the kitchen into the living room. “Take your pants down and get over my knee,” she said. After spanking me for several minutes with her hand (a rarity now), I was told that I could expect to be turned over her knee whenever I get out of line. If that wasn’t acceptable, I could climb off her lap, pull up my pants and leave for good. Those were her terms. We have been married for over a quarter-century now, so you know how THAT one turned out. 

Gary

Yourself and my husband were fortunate to find women who give you spanking. I did notice you had a problem looking at other women while you were out with your wife. I am afraid young man that if you ever pulled that stunt with me you would go over my lap for a spanking that would get your mind of wanting to be spanked. Ms L

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19 hours ago, Spankingmyhuby said:

Spankees before you were married did you let your partner know that spanking was important to you? What was your partner reaction ? Same question to spankees who are dating. What was your partner reaction."As a wife who gives her husband discipline, this was brought up and I knew that I had to give him the spankings he needs. For spankees on this forum the sooner your partner knows the better. Their should have been agreement made early in the relationship.

I agree that this should be brought up early in a relationship, but to be honest, I didn't even know myself back then. I knew I had an urge to spank, but I had no idea how much I needed to BE spanked and for my wife to take control. That understanding came much later. And it took my wife a while to get used to the idea as well.

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2 hours ago, Spankingmyhuby said:

Yourself and my husband were fortunate to find women who give you spanking. I did notice you had a problem looking at other women while you were out with your wife. I am afraid young man that if you ever pulled that stunt with me you would go over my lap for a spanking that would get your mind of wanting to be spanked. Ms L

Deservedly so, I have to admit. That has been among a few bad habits of mine that my wife is determined to break. I am a better man for all the times I’ve had my pants taken down and been turned over her knee for a date with her hairbrush. Nonetheless, I remain a work in progress with some resistant naughty boy tendencies. 

Gary 

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20 hours ago, Spankingmyhuby said:

You know yourself and you know what you need. Would you make that women HoH and run everything.

Probably not, as I’m too independent.  I do like it when my domme is strict with me, though.  She brings out the best in me at those times, so maybe.  But she’s not interested in being an HoH.

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2 minutes ago, GaryMcKee said:

Deservedly so, I have to admit. That has been among a few bad habits of mine that my wife is determined to break. I am a better man for all the times I’ve had my pants taken down and been turned over her knee for a date with her hairbrush. Nonetheless, I remain a work in progress with some resistant naughty boy tendencies. 

Gary 

Their should be more women like your wife and I. I am surprised how many men want to submit to a spanking from the superior sex. This has been a good outlet for me while my husband is working. I have learned that their many men who are just like juveniles who need a mommy to spank them.

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1 hour ago, Spankingmyhuby said:

Their should be more women like your wife and I. I am surprised how many men want to submit to a spanking from the superior sex. This has been a good outlet for me while my husband is working. I have learned that their many men who are just like juveniles who need a mommy to spank them.

It’s a fact. Not every man, of course but literally millions of us guys for sure. 

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I was married before the internet, at a time when I thought I had to be the only person into spanking in the world.  After the internet, I found out how wrong I had been.  I tried with my wife but she said has never understood.  I would not go back and change things now, because I have two wonderful children.  But still it has hurt our marriage when she made me feel as though something had to be terribly wrong with me.

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3 minutes ago, KentuckyGuy said:

I was married before the internet, at a time when I thought I had to be the only person into spanking in the world.  After the internet, I found out how wrong I had been.  I tried with my wife but she said has never understood.  I would not go back and change things now, because I have two wonderful children.  But still it has hurt our marriage when she made me feel as though something had to be terribly wrong with me.

Well being a women I don't feel she should make you feel that way. I don't tend to be a psychiatrist but I feel men who need a spanking are kind of reverting back to the juvenile  days . Spanking is a juvenile punishment so a wife should treat it that way. I don't think most men will admit what I just said. However a wife should understand her husband and spank him like I do with my husband. We all have a little juvenile in all of us or were boring people.

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