Hurtbottom 12 Posted February 9 Share Posted February 9 Hi. I’m Liz and I’m 23. My godparents are in the role of parents in my life. They have created rules for me that I am expected to follow. I’m currently extremely pissed at them. I know that to most people, these rules will sound reasonable. But I struggle with severe anxiety and depression and ptsd and ocd and this stuff is really hard for me and I feel like they are putting too much on me. I homeschool their son 3 days a week (and family movie/game night on the third day after school) . And mornings are hard for me. But they send me a confirmation text 30 minutes before pickup and I am required to respond within 5 minutes else that days visit is cancelled. When they arrive to pick me up, I am required to be outside within 5 minutes, else that days visit is cancelled. I am required to wear a mask every time I walk outside my apartment. If I forget, then no visitation for a week. I am required to do my chores the night before and text them when I have them done by 12am at the latest. I am furious because they keep adding more and more rules!! I fucking hate rules! Call me a brat, a bitch , whatever. This is where I’m at emotionally. Anyone care to help me process through this? My main question is how do I submit to them when I think they are wrong and I am furious with them? Link to post
Busted4fun 60 Posted February 9 Share Posted February 9 Are they paying you or paying for your housing? Why do you feel you need to submit? Do they assume the role of disciplinarian for you? Link to post
sarahotk 31 Posted February 9 Share Posted February 9 Hey Liz , I totally get where you are coming from with all the rules and expectations. I have a very similar relationship with my auntie. She sets my whole routine and governs everything I do. But I have to believe it is on my best interests and although like you I dont always think she is right I just accept things for how they are because it is my path at the moment. Try to see the rules and structure put in your life by your Godparents as a way of strengthening you as a person not something to make you feel weaker. All the rules and discipline I have to put up with, I really dont like either but I have to hope they are there for a reason. But I completely understand your situation and how difficult it can be at times. Link to post
Hurtbottom 12 Posted February 10 Author Share Posted February 10 @busted4fun, 1. no 2. Because they are asking me to abide by these rules and consequences. And they want me to trust that they have good reasoning. 3. I guess so... Link to post
Hurtbottom 12 Posted February 10 Author Share Posted February 10 @sarahotk, is there a time you would be free to pm back and forth? I really would like to discuss this more with you as you are the person who seems to best understand this dynamic. Link to post
Hurtbottom 12 Posted February 10 Author Share Posted February 10 Yes, I will say that although my godparents do not call themselves disciplinarians, it very much is a disciplinarian type relationship that I have consented to. But I’m currently just not wanting to submit because I am angry and overwhelmed by lots of new rules. But yes, it is very much a discipline type relationship (platonic obviously lol, I really should not even need to spell that out lol). I have already told you what the rules are in my first post. In addition, I am also required to report to them if I break the mask rule. And all of things (well, these are the new rules but there is other stuff I have been abiding by for a long time already), are spelled out in a contract that all three of us have signed. Link to post
Jay.670 4 Posted February 11 Share Posted February 11 Sarah, are you back to living with, and getting spanked by your Aunt? It must be tough for a young adult trying to go out on her own these days, with the pandemic and its economic consequences. Link to post
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