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What is Christian Domestic Discipline?


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4 minutes ago, michgal.k said:

Relax. Not offended. Just agree with her thoughts on this discussion.  

Thank for your post.

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7 minutes ago, DisobedientMIboy32 said:

Why not just call it misogynistic domestic discipline? It doesn't seem fair that christianity should have a monopoly on it... Islam must feel left out

Your absolutely correct. Maybe I should have. All can see my strong prejudiced against all women. I am surprised it is that obvious. I thought I hid it well.

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2 hours ago, Oldbrat said:

I am sorrry you were offended, Truly. 

I wouldn't say I was offended. I just didn't agree. You are entitled to your opinion and I am entitled to mine.

 

2 hours ago, Oldbrat said:

Ma'am, boudaries and rules cannot be modified and/or terms changed until this rules have ended. 

Sure they can!! I am in a consensual non-consent relationship.  I still have my same rules, but we have sat down and discussed them several times. In the process some rules have stayed the same, some have been thrown out, some have been modified and some new rules have been added. We did not have to end everything to do this. Each relationship is unique, be it CDD or not. There is no set way for it to be done. The Bible doesn't state that every marriage/relationship has to be the exact same.

 

2 hours ago, Oldbrat said:

The interpretion you took frrom my writing is against the will of God!

I grew up in Church, I've taught Sunday school, I was the Church secretary, I led on our church bus and I was a counselor at our summer camp. I am well versed in the Bible. My Church certainly didn't teach the things you wrote. Our husbands and wives were loving partners who supported each other. One did not rule the other. I could quote verses and give meanings, but I don't feel SN is the place for all of that. People don't come here to read the Bible.

I offered my opinion on what you wrote, just as you gave your opinion to begin with. In my opinion, some of your writing was not correct or God's will.

God didn't expect men to rule their wives. He expected the husband to be the leader and his wife to be the helper. The husband wasn't told to spank his wife when she was defiant or when she didn't obey him in every way. 

CDD is a lifestyle choice, the same as DD, D/s, etc. It's the choice of the 2 people involved. CDD does not come directly from the Bible. The Bible is only used to rationalize this lifestyle choice.

 

WAIT.....I will bring up one area of the Bible here because it pisses me off when I hear this.

The author of this post said: Some women are naturally inclined to be defiant; it was Eve’s unwillingness to obey God that got her and Adam expelled from Eden.

It is true that Eve was the first one to sin but whom did God question first after Adam and Eve sinned? Adam was questioned first because he was the leader of the family. To whom is sin attributed throughout all of scripture? Adam (See 1 Corinthians 15:22, 15:45; Romans 5:15) Adam was responsible for his wife Eve; he shirked that responsibility by following her leading in disobedience to God in eating the forbidden fruit. Interestingly, when God tells Adam and Eve His plan to redeem mankind (Genesis 3:15), He says the Redeemer will be "Her Seed"  So, even though Eve was the first to sin, through her descendants would come mankind's redeemer Jesus Christ. Sin is attributed to Adam (because of his leadership role), and so spreads to all people, men and women. Redemption comes through the offspring of Eve: The Messiah. 

1 hour ago, DisobedientMIboy32 said:

Why not just call it misogynistic domestic discipline? It doesn't seem fair that christianity should have a monopoly on it... Islam must feel left out

I agree!!! This post sounded very prejudiced against women!!

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17 minutes ago, shygurl said:

WAIT.....I will bring up one area of the Bible here because it pisses me off when I hear this.

The author of this post said: Some women are naturally inclined to be defiant; it was Eve’s unwillingness to obey God that got her and Adam expelled from Eden.

It is true that Eve was the first one to sin but whom did God question first after Adam and Eve sinned? Adam was questioned first because he was the leader of the family. To whom is sin attributed throughout all of scripture? Adam (See 1 Corinthians 15:22, 15:45; Romans 5:15) Adam was responsible for his wife Eve; he shirked that responsibility by following her leading in disobedience to God in eating the forbidden fruit. Interestingly, when God tells Adam and Eve His plan to redeem mankind (Genesis 3:15), He says the Redeemer will be "Her Seed"  So, even though Eve was the first to sin, through her descendants would come mankind's redeemer Jesus Christ. Sin is attributed to Adam (because of his leadership role), and so spreads to all people, men and women. Redemption comes through the offspring of Eve: The Messiah. 

I agree!!! This post sounded very prejudiced against women!!

I totally agree with this section. God gave man woman to be a helpmate. And the coward thru her under the bus. He should have said , " I chose to Disobey you. I was weak. He should have accepted God wrath. After his punishment, he should administered her correction. 

I believe you could have went one verse lower. Genesis 3:16.

Adding this verse will confirm I am predjuced again the female gender.

Yes, my opinion was very prejudiced. I agree. I am a hateful predjuced man. Such a very prejudiced hateful opinion should not have been shared. 

 

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  7 hours ago, Oldbrat said:

I wouldn't say I was offended. I just didn't agree. You are entitled to your opinion and I am entitled to mine.

 *** Your correct that all are entitled to his / her opinion but stating them is appropriate to state them when it is offensive because that is hate speech and I should not have said anything. ****

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  7 hours ago, Oldbrat said:

Ma'am, boundaries and rules cannot be modified and/or terms changed until this rules have ended. 

Sure they can!! I am in a consensual non-consent relationship.  I still have my same rules, but we have sat down and discussed them several times. In the process some rules have stayed the same, some have been thrown out, some have been modified and some new rules have been added. We did not have to end everything to do this. Each relationship is unique, be it CDD or not. There is no set way for it to be done. The Bible doesn't state that every marriage/relationship has to be the exact same.

 **** Communication and Negotiation should always be relationships. But respectfully one must end before they can be changed, unless there is one that is wished, by the couple, remains in effect. Even if ended two seconds before modification are made.****

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  7 hours ago, Oldbrat said:

The interpretation you took from my writing is against the will of God!

***This way worded way to wrong on my part.    It should have said, The interpretation you took from my writing, makes my interpretation as it  is against the will of God!****

I grew up in Church, I've taught Sunday school, I was the Church secretary, I led on our church bus and I was a counselor at our summer camp. I am well versed in the Bible. My Church certainly didn't teach the things you wrote. Our husbands and wives were loving partners who supported each other. One did not rule the other. I could quote verses and give meanings, but I don't feel SN is the place for all of that. People don't come here to read the Bible.

**** I never meant it to appear that I thought you were not a Christian. .****

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 I offered my opinion on what you wrote, just as you gave your opinion to begin with. In my opinion, some of your writing was not correct or God's will.

** The way I wrote it I can see how you feel that. .****

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God didn't expect men to rule their wives. He expected the husband to be the leader and his wife to be the helper. The husband wasn't told to spank his wife when she was defiant or when she didn't obey him in every way. 

****I totally agree it is not commanded..***

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CDD is a lifestyle choice, the same as DD, D/s, etc. It's the choice of the 2 people involved. CDD does not come directly from the Bible. The Bible is only used to rationalize this lifestyle choice.

*** I never clamed it did.***  I said multiple times it is to be -- both he and his lady must agree to a set of Fully Negotiated boundaries and rules she can and will follow,--  Again she can and will follow, If that is none it is none, It is not Demanded by the Almighty. ***

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WAIT.....I will bring up one area of the Bible here because it pisses me off when I hear this.

The author of this post said: Some women are naturally inclined to be defiant; it was Eve’s unwillingness to obey God that got her and Adam expelled from Eden.

It is true that Eve was the first one to sin but whom did God question first after Adam and Eve sinned? Adam was questioned first because he was the leader of the family. To whom is sin attributed throughout all of scripture? Adam (See 1 Corinthians 15:22, 15:45; Romans 5:15) Adam was responsible for his wife Eve; he shirked that responsibility by following her leading in disobedience to God in eating the forbidden fruit. Interestingly, when God tells Adam and Eve His plan to redeem mankind (Genesis 3:15), He says the Redeemer will be "Her Seed"  So, even though Eve was the first to sin, through her descendants would come mankind's redeemer Jesus Christ. Sin is attributed to Adam (because of his leadership role), and so spreads to all people, men and women. Redemption comes through the offspring of Eve: The Messiah. 

*** Shy -- I totally agree with this section. God gave man woman to be a helpmate. And the coward thru her under the bus, He should have said , " I chose to Disobey you. I was weak!! 

He should have accepted God Punishment!!!

I believe, again in my opinion, in Genesis 3:1-6, Adam could have heard the whole conversation. IF SO, He was more at fault than Eve because he could have said something to her when the Serpent was indirectly calling the Almighty a liar, Gen 3: 6b (“and she gave also to her husband with her and he ate”) frequently isolate the woman by failing to translate עמה (“with her”) in this verse.

Regardless, how exactly was Adam responsible for his wife's actions? Until this situation nowhere does it say Adam had any authority over her or her actions. Both sinned, both passed the buck on fault. Like children, no me it is that persons fault. Both should have taken responsibility for his and her only commandment. Don't eat from that tree.     

Now after the situation, I agree he was responsible for her actions.  Genesis 3:16.  And when a man's wife refused to listen to her husband the man was able to divorce her, Nowhere does it say that he can spank or punish her. If she displeased him he could just write her a get, divorce, with the clothes on her back.  

Deuteronomy 24:1-3 - New International Version

1. If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, 2. and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, 3. and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house

Yes, adding this verses will confirm I am against the female gender.

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3 hours ago, michgal.k said:

Are we really about to have a 'Bible verse' throw down on here? 

Not by me. I could argue the Bible with him all day, but it would be pointless. I hate hearing men blame everything on women because of Eve...which is why I said what I did. I said my piece and I'm done.  

Men who are prejudiced against women have no no reason being in a relationship with one, especially a spanking relationship.

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Just throwing this out there but reading this thread it seems that everyone is focussing on the man as the dominant within the relationship, yet I know a good many strong willed women who take the discipline lead within a household including the discipline of the male, my first wife for one. We had agreed early in our relationship that respect worked both ways and each could and would discipline the other when needed. It made for a loving and warm relationship.

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8 hours ago, Jeffd said:

Just throwing this out there but reading this thread it seems that everyone is focussing on the man as the dominant within the relationship, yet I know a good many strong willed women who take the discipline lead within a household including the discipline of the male, my first wife for one. We had agreed early in our relationship that respect worked both ways and each could and would discipline the other when needed. It made for a loving and warm relationship.

In the context of regular DD, that works... but so often in CDD, participants try to use the Bible to justify the inclusion of DD into the relationship. They use scripture as the basis for CDD. Scripture could not really be used to support a Female-led CDD marriage because wives are supposed to submit to their husbands. 

What isn't often mentioned in discussions of CDD is the man's responsibilities and his role as family leader. There is always a focus on disciplining an errant wife... because, hey, spanking! But for CDD to work, the husband has to have a firm relationship with God and be strong in his faith; he has to make sound judgments and be a thoughtful listener. He has to admit when he is wrong and he has to be willing to admit and correct his failings. All of that is the very "unsexy" reality of CDD that people skirt around.

CDD sometimes appeals to men who like to be controlling or who have low self-esteem and want to be the boss. It also appeals to gaslighters and abusers and misogynists. It can appeal to very nice people, too... but those people rarely see a woman as an errant child who gets out of control and needs to be brought back into line. They don't see a woman as an object to be controlled, but as a true partner. Successful, purpose-driven CDD requires communication, caring, and dedication - two people who both have weaknesses, but who strive for something more. Spanking should be the very least of a CDD relationship and should probably be a last resort.

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Removed several posts. Please keep other members threads on subject. Take your play-time, arguments and family squabbles to the game section, PM, etc.

Also, please do not share personal info about another member on the public forums without their permission.

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1 hour ago, shygurl said:

Removed several posts. Please keep other members threads on subject. Take your play-time, arguments and family squabbles to the game section, PM, etc.

Also, please do not share personal info about another member on the public forums without their permission.

Thank you

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Yikes. I've been with a man who wanted this. Just no. I realized later he was just a control freak.   Even I was still a Christian, I'd never consent to this type of relationship.  Marriage and relationships should be a partnership, not one person having power over the other.

A bit off topic, but I have never consented to a spanking, not even a disciplinary one, without a safeword or signal of some kind.  I knew if I used it without a good reason, I'd be in more trouble and I never felt the need to, except on one occasion which is another story, but it was there just in case.

18 years ago, I knew an EE who tried to use a safeword in the middle of a spanking and her ER wouldn't stop because she wasn't allowed a safeword for disciplinary spankings. She'd had a sudden pain in her side but couldn't get the words out to tell him. She ended up in the ER later that day where she was diagnosed with a cracked rib.  The ER was not bad guy, he felt terrible, he just didn't know and couldn't have known because the EE couldn't communicate it to him.  Needless to say, he changed his policy on safewords after that.

There are just too many things that could go wrong.

 

 

 

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