Jump to content
Spanking Needs Forums

Can you tell who is a spankophile through nonverbal cues?


Recommended Posts

  • Replies 66
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Posts

I kid you not, that actually happened to me once. I was married and working at a small, old-fashioned dairy. One day a man came up to the cash register where I was standing and announced in a smiling,

I agree with the vibe. I can usually detect a vanilla right away, without even conversing with him for long. Occasionally I pick up a spanko vibe in men who have played with the idea of being spanked

Wish I'd stumble across a guy wearing a shirt that said this!  

There is a couple I know in our circle that could well be DD type spankos. At a breakfast at their home they served breakfast using a spanking type paddle. I didn’t know what it was at the time. The woman has on more than one occasion said if I were in her home that my memory lapses would be corrected in short shrift and she’s used terms like head of household etc. I also remember a peculiar incident, I had a problem with my knee and had to lower myself gingerly onto a seat. I remember her pointing it out to hubby and couldn’t work out why this was interesting- seems in retrospect they may have had the same thought about us. The husband is very well behaved and does all cooking shopping etc. Both seem very content and happy. So I wonder if a mix of verbal and nonverbal cues could signify a spanking relationship.

  • Like 2
Link to post

I think little things people say can tell you whether they are or they arent... little things like the way a husband will look at his wife when she does something silly or a whisper in the ear. I notice when i woman says yes sir or yes maam a lot.. they may be..

  • Like 1
Link to post

All you women out there, try this little experiment. If travelling in a bus or train, take a flat backed brush out of your bag and give it a little tap on your hand. If you look around, you'll notice some squirming or a spark of interest in others around you. 

  • Like 2
Link to post
  • 3 months later...

Some years ago I read a claim by a dominant woman that when she was single and in a social setting she would let a sandal dangle off her foot and then she would check to see which men's eyes were drawn to her foot. Is this a way to filter for submissive (not just spanking fetishists) men? And if it does work, why?

Maybe she's right and most men with some submissive inclinations would look. I'm pretty sure I would. She'd surely get her share of false positives as well. Or maybe foot fetishists as a rule trend submissive?

On 10/7/2020 at 4:33 AM, Adek said:

There is a couple I know in our circle that could well be DD type spankos. At a breakfast at their home they served breakfast using a spanking type paddle. I didn’t know what it was at the time. The woman has on more than one occasion said if I were in her home that my memory lapses would be corrected in short shrift and she’s used terms like head of household etc. I also remember a peculiar incident, I had a problem with my knee and had to lower myself gingerly onto a seat. I remember her pointing it out to hubby and couldn’t work out why this was interesting- seems in retrospect they may have had the same thought about us. The husband is very well behaved and does all cooking shopping etc. Both seem very content and happy.

This is about as likely a case of a domestic discipline relationship as anyone is ever going to run across with the exception of being told straight up, unprompted. Nothing is 100% but those are strong indicators, and even stronger in combination. She is acting like she wants to share. I think your wife could find out the story in about half a minute at the most, if she made an observation in private along the lines of, "I've noticed your husband is really well behaved...".

  • Like 2
Link to post

I think some spankos give off a certain vibe - especially male Tops. Even vanilla guys that might be willing to spank put out a different sort of vibe than a straight vanilla. Or maybe that is my imagination?  

  • Like 1
Link to post
7 hours ago, rubyredd said:

I think some spankos give off a certain vibe - especially male Tops. Even vanilla guys that might be willing to spank put out a different sort of vibe than a straight vanilla. Or maybe that is my imagination?  

I agree with the vibe. I can usually detect a vanilla right away, without even conversing with him for long. Occasionally I pick up a spanko vibe in men who have played with the idea of being spanked or who just have bottoming potential. I haven't met many of them, but it has happened. I detected full-out spanko vibes in my closest female friend's boyfriend. She was clueless, bless her heart, but I could read it clear as day, long before I said anything to her about it and we brought his spanko side out of the closet. (He's fully "out" now... and she's still fully vanilla. :unsure:)  If I were more overt, I'd be quicker to tease these occasional guys with a spanking threat to see how they responded. As I'm getting older I'm getting bolder, so maybe after Covid I'll see if I have any luck rounding up a local guy or two to be spankees. What man in his right mind wouldn't benefit from a little discipline? :D 

  • Like 5
Link to post

Sometimes I deliberately give people non-verbal cues to see if they will pick up on them. The raised eyebrow, "the look," or whatever. If communicating electronically, sometimes a meme or image that might trigger recognition if someone is wired that way.

  • Like 3
Link to post

Years ago, I was an outdoor ed instructor. One group I had, there was a parent chaperone who kept making references to corporal punishment (which we did NOT use in the program). I don't remember what all of them were, but I do remember her suggesting "a switch" when some of the kids were fooling around and not listening. It wasn't just that she said those things, it was how: I got the sense that she was deep into it. I hope she was into it in the consensual adult way, but if she thought it was appropriate for kids... well, I did wonder what was going on at home, and kind of worry about her kid (he wasn't showing any reportable signs of abuse, but...) 

The real tell, though, was that when I had a minor accident that left me with a very obvious, nasty bruise, she offered me some arnica, telling me how good it was for bruises, and everything she said about it was exactly what I'd read on spanko sites. I mean, who's going to have an obsession with corporal punishment and such a familiarity with arnica?

Link to post

I've picked up dominant and submissive vibes, not necessarily spanko vibes. In one case, it was so clear to me that a trio of people I was talking to were a D/s poly triad that I subtly outed myself in a way they could choose to take the bait or not. They did. Their expressions were priceless, and it led to an open and fun exchange. Even though they responded so well, I kind of regretted having done it in retrospect just because I worried it was inappropriate at that time and place. But there was nobody else around to overhear, and someone vanilla wouldn't have picked up on it anyway. The choice to start a conversation about it was theirs.

I think I sometimes use nonverbal cues to pick up on authority gradients between individuals, but unless I see something more specific to add to it, there's no telling what it means. I do somewhat suspect a family member's new husband is a spanko, though, because they have way too much fun with their little everyday power struggles. She gets bratty, he gets authoritative, and you can just tell by their body language and the gleam in their eyes that they thrive on it. Also, his hand is always gravitating to her backside even around other people, and I've seen him playfully smack it before.

For every person or couple I've suspected to be spankos, there were probably many more I've come across who I never would have guessed. I'm skeptical that spanko radar could be that accurate, if it exists.

Link to post
7 hours ago, Spanknutt said:

Sometimes I deliberately give people non-verbal cues to see if they will pick up on them. The raised eyebrow, "the look," or whatever. If communicating electronically, sometimes a meme or image that might trigger recognition if someone is wired that way.

A raised eyebrow makes me blush and/or look down for a second. Dead giveaway. Lol

Link to post
On 1/30/2021 at 12:22 PM, Chawsee said:

I agree with the vibe. ... What man in his right mind wouldn't benefit from a little discipline? :D 

Or a lot of discipline??

Either i cannot detect vibes, or Utah has no spankers! ... and only one spankee?

i really wonder if anyone ever picks up any vibes from me?

  • Like 1
Link to post
Just now, ammon said:

Or a lot of discipline??

Either i cannot detect vibes, or Utah has no spankers! ... and only one spankee?

i really wonder if anyone ever picks up any vibes from me?

If I were to meet you face-to-face and talk with you for a while, without knowing who you are-- that you're Ammon-- I'm pretty certain that I could still pick it up. As an empath, I'm sensitively tuned into people and can often detect very specific things about them. I could be wrong, and perhaps I wouldn't pick up on your vibe at all. But I think I would. This happens somewhat also, but to a lesser degree, in written correspondences. 

  • Like 2
Link to post
On 10/6/2020 at 7:40 AM, polarbear150 said:

Is it possible to tell who is a a spanker or spankee through body language or other non verbal cues?  Has it ever happened to you?

Hope not.

  • Haha 1
Link to post
13 minutes ago, Chawsee said:

If I were to meet you face-to-face and talk with you for a while, without knowing who you are-- that you're Ammon-- I'm pretty certain that I could still pick it up. As an empath, I'm sensitively tuned into people and can often detect very specific things about them. I could be wrong, and perhaps I wouldn't pick up on your vibe at all. But I think I would. This happens somewhat also, but to a lesser degree, in written correspondences. 

i wish we could have the experiment, Miss Chawsee!!

Would You suggest a paddling session, if You met me, and perceived the vibe?

  • Like 1
Link to post
4 minutes ago, ammon said:

i wish we could have the experiment, Miss Chawsee!!

Would You suggest a paddling session, if You met me, and perceived the vibe?

Thank you, Ammon. :) Honestly, I think a paddling from me would be a disappointment to you, my sweet friend. You have an amazing pain threshold. You crave severe paddlings that leave you bruised and sore for several days. That's one tough guy!! There are tops who are talented in their ability to provide sessions like this, but I'm not one of them. I'm a quiet maternal-type spanker. Envision a ranch mom. That's me. My typical style is bare-bottom OTK with my hand (on a few guys), a paddle (on most), and occasionally over a bed or sofa arm with a belt. A spanking from me would be a snooze compared to what you're used to.  

  • Like 2
Link to post
18 minutes ago, Chawsee said:

Thank you, Ammon. :) Honestly, I think a paddling from me would be a disappointment to you, my sweet friend. You have an amazing pain threshold. You crave severe paddlings that leave you bruised and sore for several days. That's one tough guy!! There are tops who are talented in their ability to provide sessions like this, but I'm not one of them. I'm a quiet maternal-type spanker. Envision a ranch mom. That's me. My typical style is bare-bottom OTK with my hand (on a few guys), a paddle (on most), and occasionally over a bed or sofa arm with a belt. A spanking from me would be a snooze compared to what you're used to.  

i'm sure a paddling from You, Miss Chawsee, would be fantastic! Your fame and Your attitude follow You, and Your strength is well-known. The paddle(s) and a belt or strap would be awesome, almost as awesome as meeting You! i doubt i could snooze! i just hope i can take all You have to offer!

Link to post
On 10/6/2020 at 5:40 AM, polarbear150 said:

Is it possible to tell who is a a spanker or spankee through body language or other non verbal cues?  Has it ever happened to you?

 

48 minutes ago, Oldbrat said:

Hope not.

i think it would be great if we could recognize one another. We could likely have a lot more connections! i can imagine some downsides, but overall, it could work to our benefit.

  • Like 1
Link to post
3 minutes ago, ammon said:

 

i think it would be great if we could recognize one another. We could likely have a lot more connections! i can imagine some downsides, but overall, it could work to our benefit.

 

I know most would find spanking for spanking sake great. I am an odd ball in that regard. I seek spanking for emotionally therapeutic sake and in a relationship, if ever able to have again, betterment of myself and the relationship.  Stress, axiety release as well as Discipline / punishment and not funishment. Like I said, I am an odd ball.

Link to post
1 hour ago, Chawsee said:

Thank you, Ammon. :) Honestly, I think a paddling from me would be a disappointment to you, my sweet friend. You have an amazing pain threshold. You crave severe paddlings that leave you bruised and sore for several days. That's one tough guy!! There are tops who are talented in their ability to provide sessions like this, but I'm not one of them. I'm a quiet maternal-type spanker. Envision a ranch mom. That's me. My typical style is bare-bottom OTK with my hand (on a few guys), a paddle (on most), and occasionally over a bed or sofa arm with a belt. A spanking from me would be a snooze compared to what you're used to.  

Don’t buy it @ammon!  Miss Chawsee can deliver!  She’s tall and very strong.  I just think she’s so conscientious about not crossing the line of abuse that she leans to the side of caution.  Blame it on all her psychology training, she’s always focused on the psyche and how these sessions affect us on a deeper level than we realize.  I’m pretty sure she’s more than capable of administering the paddling you want, but whether she’d agree to it or not, I couldn’t say. 

Methinks I just landed myself in more trouble.  I better get off here.  My mouth is getting the best of me today.  🙄

  • Like 2
Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×
×
  • Create New...