Jump to content
Spanking Needs Forums

Severe self-spanking needed, need implement advice

Recommended Posts

Hi. So it's a long story and my migraine has gotten pretty bad so I'm going to try and do a very short version so I might get some answers more quickly. Feel free to ask questions. I'll answer anything but 1 thing: what I did wrong. 

I've recently repeatedly done something awful. It's becoming almost habit but the intention behind it, especially at first... Well... It's an almost dangerous habit. No... Not cutting etc. Life's not in danger, I promise. But it's quite serious regardless both because it's not healthy and it's hurting my family in the process (they just don't realize it).

I have no disciplinarian anymore. Haven't in 4+ years. I'd say that the last 3 I've been ok with that and adjusted to no spanking period. I need a woman for a safety thing and there are none to be had any closer than 3 hours from where I live. So with my psychologist I learned to "change."

But a spanko shall always be a spanko. This began and I realized I needed help, even if I had to go back to self spanking which I don't even remember the last time I did it.

Anyway... I need one really bad self spanking for what I've already done and need to continue each time I would do it again. It needs to be the worst I can possibly give myself. There is one problem. My arms are extremely weak. My health has been abysmal for the last 4 1/2 month to the point of having to stay with my parents all that time... 7 ER visits... 2 hospitalizations (almost 3)... More needed but stayed home because it's chronic and one of these times they'll refuse to help again. (I never ask for nor get actual pain meds, just to be clear). I have some times when I can function... Ergo when looking for help or when I CAN self spank. I would never push myself beyond my limits.


But I still need severe punishment asap. The one thing that has hurt the worst in all my years as a spankee was a smallish, fairly thin wooden paddle with lots of small unbeveled holes applied with reserve by my favorite disciplinarian. (Like a 2nd dad to me, but so damn strong!) He would use a senior-level lexan cane all the way from 3/4 up my bottom to top 1/3 of my thighs full force and it wasn't as bad as that paddle. I asked for it myself... I WANTED blisters at the time. Details not necessary but I had done something really stupid and dangerous considering a position I was in with some really bad people. That paddle was the worst thing ever at swat number one. (And he only gave me like a total of 5 blood blisters as he refused to spank on top of them. They were gone by morning).


I need something very light because of my weakness... I've found one made of bamboo and 9 extra holes can safely be added. My friend... The only person in the world who knows what I did and I pray it remains so... Suggested a leather paddle with studs, thinking it might be easier to wield. Three questions there... 1: What does such a thing feel like? I've never had a leather paddle before let alone the studded kind. 2: Are the studs dangerous? 3: Do you think that the leather paddle would be easier to wield by someone in my condition than a lightweight paddle? (Here's the link to the paddle I have in mind)

If you have any other suggestions feel free to speak up! I just need it to be the harshest thing I can give myself... Something I would never use otherwise. https://www.etsy.com/listing/846236884/bamboo-spanking-paddle-with-holes-bdsm?campaign_label=convo_notifications&utm_source=transactional&utm_campaign=convo_notifications_010170_10683759063_0_0&utm_medium=email&utm_content=&email_sent=1601834706&euid=5sr6vWKKm9oRRR1XP4k3MUZALR71&eaid=14976800538&x_eaid=155c5dc2ff

Please respond... I truly do need to attack this and the sooner the better. Thank you so much in advance.

Link to post

Have you considered a Loopy Johnny?  Most are made with tubing.  I made mine out of solid rubber cord for some reason.  This implement is quite severe and will not take much physical effort to leave purple marks but it would require A ton of willpower to self spank with.

   Please be careful 


https://www.etsy.com/search?q=loopy johnny&ref=auto-1

Link to post

Kelly,  i would be leery about spending precious money on the bamboo paddle shown.  The holes might remind you of past spankings but would not be as intense as the current bathbrush.  The shorter handle is harder to self spank with.  Finally bamboo is more likely to split than most wood varieties, which would be dangerous.

A leather paddle by itself would be a letdown.  I have no experience with studs but imagine would have to be used very carefully to avoid injury.  You may not have that level of control.

You might consider one of those slender plastic/acrylic miniblind twirling rods.  They can fill in for a cane in a pinch and might be something you have easy access to.  Otherwise easily obtained new or used.

  • Like 1
Link to post

The worst thing ever used on me growing up was a piece of hot wheels track. It is a flexible plastic with ridges on thee sides to keep the cars on the track. These ridges leave parallel welts on the skin and may even cut. I would suggest folding the piece like a belt to give it added stability. I have never used it on anyone, yet, but I still remember how it hurt and lasted. Be careful and safe. Feel free to contact me if I can be of any help.

Link to post

Thick rubber strap is painful, as well as a cable (about the size of the computer monitor cable) Switch has some good sting to it, also a car radio antenna if you can find one hurts like crazy. If you want to add extra pain, spank your thighs also (both inside and outside thighs) That is more painful than just on the bottom.

Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...