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pavium

Needing it but not wanting it

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This one is for my fellow EEs.  Just a silly vent.  Do you often feel like you really need a spanking, but that you don’t really want one?  How do you handle that?  What’s it like for you?

I’ve felt the need growing all week, so I’m  going to ask (beg?) for a spanking tonight.  I think it needs to be a good one.  At the same time,  ugh!,  it’s such a pain in the ass getting it!  Wouldn’t it be simpler to just get a massage or something?  (I’m joking a bit.  I feel love/hate for this obsession).

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I am.in the same.boat.  I am.feeling under spanked and have 2 big To Do's tomorrow.  If I don't get them accomplished it is full punishment later next week.  I don't really WANT that... But I need more than I got this week.. It is like a tag itching the back of your neck making you crazy.  

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When I feel like that, I argue with myself about getting the spanking for a while, until I finally decide to get the spanking scheduled and have done with it.

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Yes!! Exactly!  I always find myself not wanting to be spanked, but feeling this great need to get one.  I haven't been spanked since late February, so this need has slowly been transforming into a want.  The day is near! I'm getting spanked tomorrow night!  Eeekkkssss!! I'm back to not wanting the spanking, but I need it!  

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I am caned for purely discipline purposes.

It really helps me keep things on track.

I dislike it. It hurts.

But I recognise that I need it: especially when it relates to 'letting go' of those things that weigh guiltily on my conscience

So I recognise the need: the necessity: the release of being caned.

But I will be shaking when told to let down my trousers and bend over.... shaking with fear!

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I always feel the need for one but when it is about to happen I don't want it.

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I am much the same as Pavium.

 Every 4 to 6 weeks or so I become completely overwhelmed with the need to be spanked. Apart from the fact that I have had an almost lifelong fascination with spanking, I have no idea where this need suddenly comes from. It is not because of something I have done. And it’s not because I have done something different or have not done for some time. And it’s not because I like or look forward to being spanked. It just happens right out of the blue and has to be resolved.

 The resolution is to be spanked. It is never immediate, but it comes. I do not look forward to it. I do not like to be spanked. I do not want to be spanked.  It really hurts and I don’t like to be hurt. But it has to happen and, when the time does come and I am undressed and getting into position, the bottom falls out of my stomach.

 After it’s over – not immediately after, but later, I feel better and back to normal, until the next time.

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On 7/10/2020 at 10:08 PM, Megthe said:

I am.in the same.boat.  I am.feeling under spanked and have 2 big To Do's tomorrow.  If I don't get them accomplished it is full punishment later next week.  I don't really WANT that... But I need more than I got this week.. It is like a tag itching the back of your neck making you crazy.  

Omg I feel exactly the same I need it so bad it's driving me crazy ugh ....

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I'm intrigued by this thread. I too have the need for a spanking (probably more often than some), but I'm one of those wired to also like it! Maybe it's because I don't get spanked for discipline or punishment or anything like that. For me it's always a stress relief, fun, or just because type of thing.

But I completely relate to needing one so bad it's almost a physical ache.

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excellent topic! I have felt this often. I know i deserve and need a spanking but as the minutes tick on and my wife is getting ready to give me it, I would love to run away. 

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