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Paddles-- Let's Talk Wood


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A little update... :rolleyes: My dear spankee, who gifted me the two beautiful Miss Rose paddles, had a heart-to-heart talk with me a couple weeks ago and asked me to ignore that they were gifts and please re-gift them to someone else so that he wouldn't have to experience them used on him again. The extremely hard exotic wood with virtually no flex made them excruciatingly painful, even when wielded lightly. I don't like extreme harshness in discipline, and neither does he. I prefer to paddle lighter and go longer, which achieves the same sore and desperate-for-it-to-end affect as pulverizing someone with a brutal beating-- which, after numerous sessions, numbs them out permanently. We both want him to keep his nerve-endings intact! So, per his respectful request (and my relief), the Miss Rose paddles went to a fellow (brave!) member here on SN.

In the meantime, I bought not one, but two, new high-quality walnut paddles, a round one from SPORKWood, and a teardrop-shaped one from LVXSupply. They finally both arrived this week. The teardrop one is the keeper for me. The shape of the handle fits my large, square Norwegian hand really well. The wood is incredibly smooth, and it has a peony flower laser-etched on top, which is so pretty. (Things like that can touch a girl's heart. :wub: ) So between the floral design and the shape, the paddle is old-fashioned looking, which matches my style of spanking. Also, because of the "teardrop," the head and handle flow into one another, making it a structurally stronger paddle. So I'm now in agreement with @lilsami on this shape. 

Tomorrow my spankee and I will be test-driving this new paddle..... ;)

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Maybe this has been mentioned but I used to have a chart showing the qualities of various types of wood.  I’ll look for it.  Of course, size, shape, weight, how you use it 😏change how a paddle feels, the type of wood also has an effect.  Guess some trees are stingier. I’m going to say my personal favorite is maple.  This is a nice maple one I bought from a place called Woodrage.  

159EA5CB-4D0C-4E2F-BCE1-147BF4C50C6E.jpeg

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Oak is good. I especially like Cherry, though. Purple Heart is good. Maple. My first paddles were from a guy in Oregon, USA called Paddle Daddy (who I believe has since retired). The rest of my paddles (with the exception of a couple I've picked up in antique stores) have been from Cane-iac, and I've been very happy with everything I've ever gotten from them. 

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  • 2 months later...

I make these paddles out of reclaimed Woods, that is, only Woods that are from dilapidated buildings burnt down buildings old school houses, out houses, churches, close down renovated bars, scrap piles to be burned, and when I go overseas for my line of work I will send back chunks of wood from the south of France Madrid, Barcelona, and over time I've collected some great Boutique types of wood rainbow grain, rare yellow cedar, European Cedar, Purple Heart Wood,

 I make the paddles by hand one at a time, no template is ever used, as is evident by the fact there is no two alike they are all one-off designs. I know it may sound a little strange but not to a spanko or someone who enjoys a well-fitted paddle, but I like to say and I mean it when I say that The paddle dictates its shape on its own somehow, it just kind of speaks to me as I'm holding it and trying to maximize the use of whatever Piece of wood I happen to be holding.

I am very careful about the SNAP SOUND OF A  good paddle as apposed to a thud of to much mass in a small area. Wood is so important that it mach the bumm and spanker.

Initial Shaping is Accomplished with a small belt sander clamped upside down in a vise, then all sandpaper in hand is used starting with 80 grit working all the way to 600 grit in the end. Other than a belt sander no other power tools except the occasional hand crank drill to bore a hole in the handle occasionally for wrist strap or hanger strap. a few have tiny extra-strong neodymium magnet under the surface to hang on a refrigerator or dry erase board etc.. The paddles with the larger holes are all done with a torch I burn the holes through first and then sand it out with sandpaper and shape and form.

 All paddles have a minimum of 30 coats or more of hand-rubbed lacquer. I started doing inlay with aromatic Cedar and boutique Woods as you can imagine it takes quite some time in some cases. I'm also nearly blind so some of the folks locally that know me, find a great deal of satisfaction in acquiring these paddles knowing that each paddle literally sculpted itself with the Sandpaper in my hand. Here are some of the pictures of recent paddles.

 Pictures don't do a whole lot of justice as some paddles are stippled some have wormholes that I've sealed up with two part clear epoxy inside the holes to seal it all up before rubbing in the lacquer. Some are actually laminated where I've taken some thin maple or bird's-eye maple and bonded with for instance purple heart on one side or rainbow Grain or one side maple on the other side red oak, cross graining, making a very thin paddle but extremely strong and resilient.

All the paddles, in the end, meet the anti THUDD test, meaning I take into account the THUDD and the SNAPP Factor, and I avoid the THUDD Factor at all times, that is to say, too much mass in too small of an area creates a THUDD. Like trying to spank with a two-by-four 2X4, All the paddles have the right weight and density Factor taken into consideration once done, they SnaPP, PoP, SiNG, Zing & or StiNG, all with a unique sound as well, some woods really translate into an amplified POP sound when smacking the fanny.

So they're built kind of like the "Field of Dreams"

"If I build them, the spankers will come" 

 

 I strongly feel they should be held before taking possession of but someone has convinced me to try and get them into the hands of more than just the local few, otherwise, they're never going to get to the rightful people they belong to.

 Folks naturally want to ask how much $, and I have to say it's impossible for me to put a number on them some take so long that it would be really impossible to put a price on them and if I was I think my attitude would change about the time that I put into each one. and I only build them in the winter. The way I've gotten rid of them is by allowing people to hold them and handle them and if one or two paddles speak to them specifically, then I say take them home. I only ask that if they grow tired of them or they are not needed any longer that they either pass them on to someone who will use them or bring them back. But recently someone came by and wanted to take 40 of them to some sort of a convention somewhere or some sort of a spank event. And he refused to just take 40 of them knowing he was going to sell them and make a profit, I initially had a problem with that but then I started thinking we'll someone's got to buy a paddle somewhere.  So I had to come up with a pricing structure somehow but I needed it to be very reasonable and not be a profit margin issue.

 So for now as a trial i have come to basically $25 for an average paddle \ and the tiny purse paddles are 15.00, if it has inlays it's 35 if it's really large its 35.00 and if its realy large and has inlays its's 45.00  add  7.50 for shipping in the lower 48 

 If someone buys a couple three of them then I'll cover shipping.

   I would rather think of the funds as donations for chemicals and paper, The chemicals can be rather expensive,  stains, varnish, and lacquer can be costly considering I buy only high-end chemicals. And my love reminds me just now that shipping the wood back when overseas has its collective costs. and boy does it.,

 

 And if there is an occasion that someone can't afford one but they really like one by sight in the pictures then communicate that to me and we'll figure out how to get it to you.

I just want to be clear that this is not about a prophet making project, it all started and is still about matching the right paddle with the right hand and fanny. That is the one and only motivator in my making them. 

I also recently took pictures of quite a few with a measuring square for scale, so some can get a good idea of the length and width of the paddles.

I know this probably sounds a little weird but if you're not able to come and actually hold the paddle if you send me a picture of the fanny that it's going to be spanking I believe that I can come pretty close to picking out the right paddle for the fanny so far I've been spot-on in my assessments in choosing the correct paddle to send out, if it's wrong,  no problems just return it and I'll swap it out for you. you pay the return shipping to me, and I pay the shipping back to you. 

I'm trying to be as fair as make sense in the policies of replacements and or swap out options. Should there ever be a mismatched paddle to a Fanny? If you pick the wrong paddle for the fanny, then you pay shipping both ways for a swap.

 

 I imagine there's a lot of very generic feeling paddles out there in a lot of hands that could be holding something custom in the hand.

 

Also, I'll add that I will replace any paddle that breaks one time as it's really the spanker's responsibility to know what they're holding in their hand and if it is appropriate for the fanny there spanking and at what velocity. Obviously, some paddles are going to be more delicate than others, now these paddles are not porcelain delicate by any means, But still ... for instance, I had one gentleman that was consistently breaking a particular design that I kept making over and over for him and I finally stopped at 5 and asked for a picture of the bottom he was spanking, and it was the wrong paddle to say the least for the amount of bottom he was spanking with that particular flavor of paddle.

 So, I made him a newly-designed paddle custom for him and that bottom and it has not come back.

These are for domestic discipline and or play between consenting adults. Please Play Safe Folks.

i am going to post all the new pictures soon, I need to crop and clean them up. these are some of the paddles here

Ill get the new pictures up in the next couple days. Here are a few.

 

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10 minutes ago, Bruisedredbotto said:

My hubby bought a thick fraternity paddle that stings/burns like fire. I have a wood burning kit so he wants me to etch on it 'Firestarter' so we'll see. He got it off amazon for only $12

I've found a couple of fine paddles at similar stores myself. 

 

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I love to make my own paddles, each is slightly different from the other. I prefer to use Tasmanian Oak for construction and love, (and hate), the feel of that wood. It has a good sting as well as a nice weighted thump when my wife thinks I need another reminder.... I spend a few hours shaping, sanding and oiling it before wrapping it's handle in either leather or binding thread.

Each paddle is used well and none have broken.

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Though I'm forever looking at paddles on Etsy, I've practiced good restraint (:D) and not bought any new ones. I have just my current two: a lightweight hickory paddle and a heavyweight walnut paddle. How did our school principals meet their disciplinary needs with just one paddle? 

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On 7/1/2020 at 4:22 PM, spankingzen said:

Maybe this has been mentioned but I used to have a chart showing the qualities of various types of wood.  I’ll look for it.  Of course, size, shape, weight, how you use it 😏change how a paddle feels, the type of wood also has an effect.  Guess some trees are stingier. I’m going to say my personal favorite is maple.  This is a nice maple one I bought from a place called Woodrage.  

159EA5CB-4D0C-4E2F-BCE1-147BF4C50C6E.jpeg

Yes maple is a great wood as well yellow cedar.

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9 hours ago, Chawsee said:

Though I'm forever looking at paddles on Etsy, I've practiced good restraint (:D) and not bought any new ones. I have just my current two: a lightweight hickory paddle and a heavyweight walnut paddle. How did our school principals meet their disciplinary needs with just one paddle? 

by only using it as a last resort ???

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42 minutes ago, ianl said:

by only using it as a last resort ???

I think it's because they administer, what, 3 swats per disciplinary session? Our paddles are more likely to administer 300. 

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23 minutes ago, Chawsee said:

I think it's because they administer, what, 3 swats per disciplinary session? Our paddles are more likely to administer 300. 

you already had the answer :))))))) 

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