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Powpaulie

A spankee always...a switch, seldom?

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I am a spankee.  It's weird that I don't actually love when I'm being spanked (it hurts!), but I do love how my bottom feels warm and sore afterwards. My heart is so happy afterwards when my spanker hugs me and kisses my forehead and tells me that I took it well. 

I have spanked before, but I don't really consider myself a spanker or a switch. I spanked a friend on her birthday, then I spanked this same friend a couple other occasions because she needed it. I can't say I enjoyed it, but I was happy to be there for her in her time of need. I would do it again for her if need be.  I don't advertise myself as a spanker, because I can't imagine myself spanking outside of my close knit friends.  Hope that makes sense. 

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That makes perfect sense. Embrace your unique combination of preferences and attributes. There is no reason to try to be something else. Everyone has a different gift to offer, and spankers NEED spankees. 

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Understand completely - I don’t know anyone who is 50/50 -er/ -ee. I’m probably 75% -ee and 25% -er. As long as you know who you are and are comfortable with it, everything is good!😊

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Even those of us who are definite switches, speaking for myself, vary on the spectrum. Some days I'm 80% toppy, oter

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Whoa, what happened there?!

Anyway, I was saying:: other times I'm mostly -ee. No one ever should apologize or feel bad for their variation of our orientation. It's all good. :)

 

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I am pretty much always in the mood to spank a woman.  Perhaps a few times a year, I get the urge to be spanked myself.   When I do, what I want is age play.  I want to be a little boy and cry from the spanking.  Interestingly enough, it is usually easier to satisfy the first desire than the second.

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Lately , I’ve been craving the opportunity to give a pretty good hand spanking. I got to give one this  week but it was short.  I  usually want to receive instead of give but both are very satisfying for me

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For me it has evolved as I've grown older and gotten to know myself better. I have always been attracted to female behinds and always have a strong urge to smack them. I love to have a bare female bottom to smack and rub and play with. Because of this, I used to think of myself as more of a spanker than a spankee.

As I developed my obsession with more serious disciplinary spankings, I learned about another side of myself. My vanilla wife hates to get a real spanking but was willing to try spanking me. I began to realize how much I needed that. And we both realized that her being in charge was something that was good for our marriage and a turn-on for both of us.

Looking back at our personalities and relationship, it makes sense. I have always been the more laid-back, easy-going, and lazy type while she's the one who gets things done. Now she has a means for motivating me to get things done. 🏏:unsure:

She says she can tell when I'm getting to the point where I need a good "ass whoopin". I get more of a smart mouth and a cocky attitude and she knows it's time to knock me down a peg. After one of her ass whoopings, I am more humble, more relaxed, and more focused on pleasing her.

It took us almost 25 years to get to this point, but I think we've found a place that really works for us. She's more empowered, and I'm more attracted to her than ever.

Unfortunately, she been hinting that I'm due for one of her ass whoopins very soon. :spank::blush.gig:

 

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Since I was a child I had a craving for anything spanking.  Being spanked is something for which I feel a powerful need.  Once I discovered there were so many others out here like me, I started giving them too.  I still crave them and always will, but I have learned to love giving them as well.

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My wife is a born Alpha submissive, ergo,  submissive only during scene activities with myself.   Whilst Z (pronounced Zee, like sea)  had been variously spanked and done some BDSM before we met, it was always at her behest and under her control.

Being aware of the extreme depth of her own submissive tendencies, Z went through various boyfriend's and a husband .....  but she never 'let it out' until we met. The first day we did a scene, it was impact .... Z dropped into sub space so deeply that it took me literally two days to get her back down to earth ... Most certainly that was taken into account on all future occasions.

Personally I am a born Alpha and nothing else would ever enter or cross my mind.

My wife and I do not see the roles of Alpha + submissive as interchangeable; but that is our personal view and what we do.

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I also struggle with this, but I’m becoming more accepting of myself. I get things done, when you talk to me with a problem, I go right the the solution and make it happen. I’m a go getter. A hard worker. My mind is positive and in my day to day life I nail a lot of stuff in the general sense. Specifically I could always be better. There’s nothing wrong with perfection but when it controls you and nothing is ever perfect, nothing ever will be. You’ll go crazy. 

There’s something about a strong, assertive female spanking a young man that gets me so excited inside. The image. I’m mesmerized and I want that. Over the lap pants down hand high or hairbrush I’m like “YES” and coming from where I do or people knowing me the way I am you would never expect it. I’m self conscious I guess. Once it’s over it’s over and I want all my respect and dignity back. So many times I’ve never gone through with it. I’ve had chances, and I experimented with my girlfriend she was supportive but not understanding. Actually this topic was around during our final days together as partners. Then we split up and became friends again, mutually and happily. 

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Crazy 2020 - might it make sense to see a professional, and get the experience without needing to worry about the IRL aftermath in the context of a continuing relationship?     -Ex.

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I'm in a similar and different place: I'm mostly a spankee, and I want to be more of a switch. For that to happen, I need to get practice giving consensual spankings.

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On 7/6/2020 at 12:32 AM, Explorify said:

Crazy 2020 - might it make sense to see a professional, and get the experience without needing to worry about the IRL aftermath in the context of a continuing relationship?     -Ex.

That’s a nice thought. Truth be told, I was never sure what to expect. When I was younger I would dabble online here and there but was thinking maybe people were like me since I was my only experience. The world wasn’t as crazy back then either, like 10 years ago and more. I’m not out to hurt feelings. At the same time I’m out to get what I want. I totally am fine with staying in contact once I meet with someone. I may not be right for an talk all day every day but who knows. I’m totally open to souls and if somebody is self aware then I maybe be attracted to that more than anything else and just want to talk. Age doesn’t matter, and there’s more to life than sex. Thank you for that comment Ex, seeing a professional won’t be out of the picture but for now I’m taking it slow 

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Depends on the professional. Both of the ones I've seen want to establish relationships with their clients. Friendships that include spankings.

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