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Question for all you Straight Guys


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This is great your right, I'm straight guy looking for a older man to administer a real discipline hairbrush spanking otk, for real discipline, it's something I can't find, I just believe that if I need to be given a punishment spanking it's far more embarrassing being bare bottom spanked to tears by a man...

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  • 3 weeks later...

A lot said on this but all I know is that between jr high and high school, I had strong visions of mature woman giving me a hard spanking. Not the pretty cheerleaders but the strong powerful female adults/authority figures. Show me a picture of a stand pose model and my thoughts are not spanking.

I was lucky to live in major cities after college where serious female ERs were readily available with AOL getting us all online. Yes, you got mail often meant an experienced female ER advertising made me jump with excitement for upcoming visit. Is that sexual? Yeah it is but to me only due to my wiring. 

I was worried when young that I was confusing sex and violence (spanking). However, I am as vanilla as they come outside getting a real spanking when opportunity presents. I own 3000 books and I broke my last pair glasses so currently taped.
 

CFNM and she is serious about a real OTK? You say you have a sadistic streak and a spanking bench ? My wiring loves this and I am rarely disappointed. But two guys? I am not wired that way. But I think it’s great if others are.  I started in early 80’s and was outed more than once. You get a bit embarrassed but no really cares. However, that did lead to curious females asking questions and I did take ER role reluctantly as safe choice. I am not wired “to hit girls”. But as one gets older you no longer see black or white but grey so now good as ER with female EE. Wiring to strong on M/M for me. 

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For me, it's more that I've never really been spanked by a guy. I'm not opposed to it, I'd take a spanking from one. Yes, to me some spanking has a sexual aspect to it but if it's discipline, maybe roll play, something like that, I like receiving not giving and I like the loss of control and the being spanked more than anything.

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On 12/12/2019 at 2:03 AM, DaChief said:

I did spank other men for a brief period but I stopped doing it for two reasons. Apologies in advance for the visceral nature of this reply.

I stopped spanking other men because 1) guys never wash their ass and it isn't the spankee's hand and implements being soiled, nor is it the spankee cleaning up the mess afterwards, and; 2) no matter how much male spankees say this isn't a sex thing, the reality is I always had my leg humped and I always had to wash their nasty jizz out of my pants. And that's why I don't spank other men anymore.

And for the guys reading this who are thinking of contacting me and saying "I'm not like those other guys;" forget it. Even if that's true, I have no reason to believe you given my past experiences. 

I'm sorry to hear about your experience. I would never present myself for spanking without washing my ass first. Also I have been spanked by straight guys and there was never any sexual chemistry. I was never even hard let alone ejaculated. :)

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  • 1 month later...
On 12/11/2019 at 6:12 AM, Melissa'sBottom said:

To give some background, I am a female who has been having some super fun spankings with another female friend.  As a woman on this site, you get bombarded with messages from guys.  All of them want to spank you.  Can I get an amen ladies?

It annoys the heck out of me when guys on this site tell me that it isn't sexual to them, and they just enjoy providing misbehaving girls with the discipline they need.  Oh, and by the way, they always insist that the discipline be bare bottomed.  Only because the discipline is more effective that way of course.  It totally has nothing to do with the fact that they want to be looking at a girls naked ass while they administer the spanking.  Like obviously everyone on this site gets turned on by spankings in some way or another.  Just admit it guys.  These same guys say that they would never spank another guy...  So obviously it is a sexual thing for them.  

So my main question is, given the obvious gender imbalance on this site and the spanking kink in general.  Why don't more guys do spankings with other guys?  I know it can initially be a little weird, but there are so many possibilities in this kink.  Surely there are ways for you straight guys to have a little fun with each other without crossing any lines you don't want to cross.  Us straight girls seem to have a lot of fun with each other...

Im straight, And have spanked and am spanked regularly by guys. I see a particular male disciplinarian on average once a month sometimes twice a month.

I honestly believe that there are guys out there spanking that it is non-sexual, there is always an overtone with both sexes an undercurrent of a sensuality I mean it is creating blood rushing right to the rear end which travels through the particular area of the vascular system that the blood is carriedt to the genitals both instances sharing the same vascular system bringing blood to the bottom and bring blood to the genitalia when aroused so when the blood is brought to the rear  there is a biological reaction in some cases. So when spanked that shared feeling of arousal when the blood rushes to the rear end.

Now let's be clear in case you are not overly clear on this Factor men will get arousal get an erection standing in line at the bus station it of course is going to happen in the higher average when being Baird for when touching someone else's rear end if they're inclined that way but it's up to them to manage those feelings and manage that drive and not let it tank or blur the motivation for the spanking those that can't control that that's a personal issue with them and even got to get a hold of themselves, maybe literally before the spanking. If I do get aroused while getting a spanking it is short-lived I'll tell you that because as soon as the sting starts happening on my bottom there was no sign of an erection after that it quickly dissipates. But my mind is not thinking sex XXXX. Men involuntarily get erections all day long. When were younger we masturbate and it takes care of it when we're older we masturbate because we can or when we can.  your natural question might be well what do you think of when you masturbate? are there some scenarios in my mind that have to do with spanking? Sure yes. but it's more of the humiliating Factor not the spanking itself, being forced to stand in front of a stranger or a a new spanking partner and bend over and be rather exposed is embarrassing and for men in basement brings an erection usually they're connected somehow in the psyche of a male.  but I don't have any true spanking images in my mind when masturbating

it's a biological factor but outside of that my motivation and other gentlemen that I know their motivation is not the sexual contact it is disciplinary.

 now I can't imagine ultimately ending up spanking someone and it not being on the bare bottom it's kind of the ritual of spanking that I've become accustomed to as most of us have,  I can't think of anybody that wishes to administer a spanking and it not be on the bare bottom I mean men have it worse when they bend over where their genitals are exposed, and I spank females and I've not had any inclination at all about any kind of sexual motivation of any kind it's truly strictly discipline now maybe I'm the rare one of males, I don't know but again I do know males that spank guys and spank women as a disciplinarian.  just like their are female disciplinarians to. There are  alpha males and a lot of the times they're not necessarily alpha males in their own home but when they get together with submissive males as myself whose primary is submissive in that role they get to dominate. I'd be glad to answer any specific questions that you might have as to at least my perspective I won't answer them if I don't have  a perspective but I've been in this panko Arena now for a good 30 years and I have come across men of course that were sexually motivated and that is always discussed before hand and if they still try to move that direction during a spanking I shut him down and they are not called on again. I've never had any inclination to have the sexual component be part of the spanking for me spanking is and  always has been about submission, discipline of sometimes an attitude adjustment, if I'm engaging in some specific specific sexual activity spanking really is not part of it at all. If having intercourse with a woman I don't even think of the spanking component. there is foreplay and a lot of genital manipulation in touch but not spanking these are two completely different articles for me, though they're closely related yeah and I can understand and see how they could be blurred very easily by some folks that don't have a managed perspective. \ there are a subset of men out there that absolutely do use spanking as a tool to further other agendas that is not spanking, but I think we're talking about different things here because spanking is such an overly used term there is a spanking for a reason, so one must ask themselves what is the reason behind this need for the spanking or the desire to spank, is it motivated by a sexual overtone or under current or is it motivated by BDSM factors, Or to affirm ones submissive nature that is not easily affirmed otherwise or to a firm a dominant nature that is not affirmed otherwise, or is it about light BDSM of discipline  where is the spanking coming from and who is receiving it for what reason? and I'm sorry that you get that creepy feeling that guys bother you,  that sucks that is inappropriate and you certainly never got that from me nobody has, Men by their drive and by the very nature can be rather overbearing and rather like a pig sometimes I find myself ashamed of their actions it is community at times and I called him out on it I'm Not Afraid at all to call them out on it. But if I was to spank you or any other person it would be expected that it would end up on a bare bottom but you would never find my hands wondering Target,  or overtly touching your genitalia specifically at all that would be completely out of character for me it just wouldn't happen I would be ashamed to taint the arena of spanking as it is let alone my self-respect and respect for the Spankee and the trust and bond that is to develop would certainly be compromised forever. 

So I hope I provided some insight from a male's perspective here I don't know if I did really answer your question or shine any light on what you were asking,  but I'm certainly open to the subject matter it's intriguing to me and would gladly engage in any questions specific that you would have for straight guy who has and does both sides of the fence but primarily I am a submissive and I switch out of favor to friends or favor to a new Spankos or someone who's just becoming interested in stressing out and I'd like to think that I can share very quickly am notion of trust and display a honest and sincere transparency.

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Just now, overherknee said:

Im straight, And have spanked and am spanked regularly by guys. I see a particular male disciplinarian on average once a month sometimes twice a month.

I honestly believe that there are guys out there spanking that it is non-sexual, there is always an overtone with both sexes an undercurrent of a sensuality I mean it is creating blood rushing right to the rear end which travels through the particular area of the vascular system that the blood is carriedt to the genitals both instances sharing the same vascular system bringing blood to the bottom and bring blood to the genitalia when aroused so when the blood is brought to the rear  there is a biological reaction in some cases. So when spanked that shared feeling of arousal when the blood rushes to the rear end.

Now let's be clear in case you are not overly clear on this Factor men will get arousal get an erection standing in line at the bus station it of course is going to happen in the higher average when being Baird for when touching someone else's rear end if they're inclined that way but it's up to them to manage those feelings and manage that drive and not let it tank or blur the motivation for the spanking those that can't control that that's a personal issue with them and even got to get a hold of themselves, maybe literally before the spanking. If I do get aroused while getting a spanking it is short-lived I'll tell you that because as soon as the sting starts happening on my bottom there was no sign of an erection after that it quickly dissipates. But my mind is not thinking sex XXXX. Men involuntarily get erections all day long. When were younger we masturbate and it takes care of it when we're older we masturbate because we can or when we can.  your natural question might be well what do you think of when you masturbate? are there some scenarios in my mind that have to do with spanking? Sure yes. but it's more of the humiliating Factor not the spanking itself, being forced to stand in front of a stranger or a a new spanking partner and bend over and be rather exposed is embarrassing and for men in basement brings an erection usually they're connected somehow in the psyche of a male.  but I don't have any true spanking images in my mind when masturbating

it's a biological factor but outside of that my motivation and other gentlemen that I know their motivation is not the sexual contact it is disciplinary.

 now I can't imagine ultimately ending up spanking someone and it not being on the bare bottom it's kind of the ritual of spanking that I've become accustomed to as most of us have,  I can't think of anybody that wishes to administer a spanking and it not be on the bare bottom I mean men have it worse when they bend over where their genitals are exposed, and I spank females and I've not had any inclination at all about any kind of sexual motivation of any kind it's truly strictly discipline now maybe I'm the rare one of males, I don't know but again I do know males that spank guys and spank women as a disciplinarian.  just like their are female disciplinarians to. There are  alpha males and a lot of the times they're not necessarily alpha males in their own home but when they get together with submissive males as myself whose primary is submissive in that role they get to dominate. I'd be glad to answer any specific questions that you might have as to at least my perspective I won't answer them if I don't have  a perspective but I've been in this panko Arena now for a good 30 years and I have come across men of course that were sexually motivated and that is always discussed before hand and if they still try to move that direction during a spanking I shut him down and they are not called on again. I've never had any inclination to have the sexual component be part of the spanking for me spanking is and  always has been about submission, discipline of sometimes an attitude adjustment, if I'm engaging in some specific specific sexual activity spanking really is not part of it at all. If having intercourse with a woman I don't even think of the spanking component. there is foreplay and a lot of genital manipulation in touch but not spanking these are two completely different articles for me, though they're closely related yeah and I can understand and see how they could be blurred very easily by some folks that don't have a managed perspective. \ there are a subset of men out there that absolutely do use spanking as a tool to further other agendas that is not spanking, but I think we're talking about different things here because spanking is such an overly used term there is a spanking for a reason, so one must ask themselves what is the reason behind this need for the spanking or the desire to spank, is it motivated by a sexual overtone or under current or is it motivated by BDSM factors, Or to affirm ones submissive nature that is not easily affirmed otherwise or to a firm a dominant nature that is not affirmed otherwise, or is it about light BDSM of discipline  where is the spanking coming from and who is receiving it for what reason? and I'm sorry that you get that creepy feeling that guys bother you,  that sucks that is inappropriate and you certainly never got that from me nobody has, Men by their drive and by the very nature can be rather overbearing and rather like a pig sometimes I find myself ashamed of their actions it is community at times and I called him out on it I'm Not Afraid at all to call them out on it. But if I was to spank you or any other person it would be expected that it would end up on a bare bottom but you would never find my hands wondering Target,  or overtly touching your genitalia specifically at all that would be completely out of character for me it just wouldn't happen I would be ashamed to taint the arena of spanking as it is let alone my self-respect and respect for the Spankee and the trust and bond that is to develop would certainly be compromised forever. 

So I hope I provided some insight from a male's perspective here I don't know if I did really answer your question or shine any light on what you were asking,  but I'm certainly open to the subject matter it's intriguing to me and would gladly engage in any questions specific that you would have for straight guy who has and does both sides of the fence but primarily I am a submissive and I switch out of favor to friends or favor to a new Spankos or someone who's just becoming interested in stressing out and I'd like to think that I can share very quickly am notion of trust and display a honest and sincere transparency.

oops, some odd spell and sentence auto correct there but i think or i hope i am conveying my thoughts clearly

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  • 4 months later...
On 9/10/2020 at 12:51 AM, overherknee said:

Im straight, And have spanked and am spanked regularly by guys. I see a particular male disciplinarian on average once a month sometimes twice a month.

I honestly believe that there are guys out there spanking that it is non-sexual, there is always an overtone with both sexes an undercurrent of a sensuality I mean it is creating blood rushing right to the rear end which travels through the particular area of the vascular system that the blood is carriedt to the genitals both instances sharing the same vascular system bringing blood to the bottom and bring blood to the genitalia when aroused so when the blood is brought to the rear  there is a biological reaction in some cases. So when spanked that shared feeling of arousal when the blood rushes to the rear end.

Now let's be clear in case you are not overly clear on this Factor men will get arousal get an erection standing in line at the bus station it of course is going to happen in the higher average when being Baird for when touching someone else's rear end if they're inclined that way but it's up to them to manage those feelings and manage that drive and not let it tank or blur the motivation for the spanking those that can't control that that's a personal issue with them and even got to get a hold of themselves, maybe literally before the spanking. If I do get aroused while getting a spanking it is short-lived I'll tell you that because as soon as the sting starts happening on my bottom there was no sign of an erection after that it quickly dissipates. But my mind is not thinking sex XXXX. Men involuntarily get erections all day long. When were younger we masturbate and it takes care of it when we're older we masturbate because we can or when we can.  your natural question might be well what do you think of when you masturbate? are there some scenarios in my mind that have to do with spanking? Sure yes. but it's more of the humiliating Factor not the spanking itself, being forced to stand in front of a stranger or a a new spanking partner and bend over and be rather exposed is embarrassing and for men in basement brings an erection usually they're connected somehow in the psyche of a male.  but I don't have any true spanking images in my mind when masturbating

it's a biological factor but outside of that my motivation and other gentlemen that I know their motivation is not the sexual contact it is disciplinary.

 now I can't imagine ultimately ending up spanking someone and it not being on the bare bottom it's kind of the ritual of spanking that I've become accustomed to as most of us have,  I can't think of anybody that wishes to administer a spanking and it not be on the bare bottom I mean men have it worse when they bend over where their genitals are exposed, and I spank females and I've not had any inclination at all about any kind of sexual motivation of any kind it's truly strictly discipline now maybe I'm the rare one of males, I don't know but again I do know males that spank guys and spank women as a disciplinarian.  just like their are female disciplinarians to. There are  alpha males and a lot of the times they're not necessarily alpha males in their own home but when they get together with submissive males as myself whose primary is submissive in that role they get to dominate. I'd be glad to answer any specific questions that you might have as to at least my perspective I won't answer them if I don't have  a perspective but I've been in this panko Arena now for a good 30 years and I have come across men of course that were sexually motivated and that is always discussed before hand and if they still try to move that direction during a spanking I shut him down and they are not called on again. I've never had any inclination to have the sexual component be part of the spanking for me spanking is and  always has been about submission, discipline of sometimes an attitude adjustment, if I'm engaging in some specific specific sexual activity spanking really is not part of it at all. If having intercourse with a woman I don't even think of the spanking component. there is foreplay and a lot of genital manipulation in touch but not spanking these are two completely different articles for me, though they're closely related yeah and I can understand and see how they could be blurred very easily by some folks that don't have a managed perspective. \ there are a subset of men out there that absolutely do use spanking as a tool to further other agendas that is not spanking, but I think we're talking about different things here because spanking is such an overly used term there is a spanking for a reason, so one must ask themselves what is the reason behind this need for the spanking or the desire to spank, is it motivated by a sexual overtone or under current or is it motivated by BDSM factors, Or to affirm ones submissive nature that is not easily affirmed otherwise or to a firm a dominant nature that is not affirmed otherwise, or is it about light BDSM of discipline  where is the spanking coming from and who is receiving it for what reason? and I'm sorry that you get that creepy feeling that guys bother you,  that sucks that is inappropriate and you certainly never got that from me nobody has, Men by their drive and by the very nature can be rather overbearing and rather like a pig sometimes I find myself ashamed of their actions it is community at times and I called him out on it I'm Not Afraid at all to call them out on it. But if I was to spank you or any other person it would be expected that it would end up on a bare bottom but you would never find my hands wondering Target,  or overtly touching your genitalia specifically at all that would be completely out of character for me it just wouldn't happen I would be ashamed to taint the arena of spanking as it is let alone my self-respect and respect for the Spankee and the trust and bond that is to develop would certainly be compromised forever. 

So I hope I provided some insight from a male's perspective here I don't know if I did really answer your question or shine any light on what you were asking,  but I'm certainly open to the subject matter it's intriguing to me and would gladly engage in any questions specific that you would have for straight guy who has and does both sides of the fence but primarily I am a submissive and I switch out of favor to friends or favor to a new Spankos or someone who's just becoming interested in stressing out and I'd like to think that I can share very quickly am notion of trust and display a honest and sincere transparency.

Straight up... I’ve gotten an erection for every single prostate exam and surgery ever. Sorry but getting a possible clump of skin cancer removed doesn’t turn me on and it isn’t sexual no matter what my unit might convey. 
This is correct 

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On 12/11/2019 at 2:12 PM, Melissa'sBottom said:

To give some background, I am a female who has been having some super fun spankings with another female friend.  As a woman on this site, you get bombarded with messages from guys.  All of them want to spank you.  Can I get an amen ladies?

It annoys the heck out of me when guys on this site tell me that it isn't sexual to them, and they just enjoy providing misbehaving girls with the discipline they need.  Oh, and by the way, they always insist that the discipline be bare bottomed.  Only because the discipline is more effective that way of course.  It totally has nothing to do with the fact that they want to be looking at a girls naked ass while they administer the spanking.  Like obviously everyone on this site gets turned on by spankings in some way or another.  Just admit it guys.  These same guys say that they would never spank another guy...  So obviously it is a sexual thing for them.  

So my main question is, given the obvious gender imbalance on this site and the spanking kink in general.  Why don't more guys do spankings with other guys?  I know it can initially be a little weird, but there are so many possibilities in this kink.  Surely there are ways for you straight guys to have a little fun with each other without crossing any lines you don't want to cross.  Us straight girls seem to have a lot of fun with each other...

 

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This is a really interesting topic, so many elements that I can relate too. I had my first proper spanking in my early teens from a male friends mum, we had been messing about in his garden and were caught by his neighbour, we were both naked at the time so I was naked for that spanking. For most of my adult life I suppressed any thoughts of spanking until much later when that itch just came right back. 
I had a very understanding female friend that was sub ( no I wasn't spanking her) but we did start chatting a lot about CP and she suggested I do something about my newly resurfaced interest. 
Up to this point I had indulged in some spanking very tame with girlfriends and yes it was largely of a sexual nature.

I met a very caring lady who helped me explore my deep rooted interest and who gave me my first adult spanking, replicating that first experience. For me being naked in front of a dressed woman was what I wanted and it made for a memorable experience, nothing at all sexual occurred but I left feeling elated with a very sore bottom.

it taught me that good communication is a must, I have spanked women since of all ages, the youngest being 22 and a discussion over coffee prior to sessioning is a must where preferences and limits can be agreed, some, not all have wanted some sort of intimate touching during and after a  spanking and I have enjoyed helping them achieve release but that is not the norm and I don't enter into a scene pushing for it or pressuring for it. For me it's about simple respect of wishes.

Now to the issue of M/M spanking, I've never indulged except for some brief experimentation in my early teens that led to that first spanking but I am most definitely curious and have chatted with a few gents on here about it, where it not for the current pandemic then I suspect I might have met by now to both give and take, hopefully it will happen. 
I consider myself straight and my first choice will likely always be for a woman to discipline me but the prospect of a guy doing it and me reciprocating adds another dynamic to my kink that just has to be explored, well that's my thought anyway, feel free to chat and help me explore.

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I think for me there is a difference between intimacy and straight sexuality, as Spanknutt mentioned a year or so back. I am a straight female and don't want to engage in an intimate act with a female because I am not wired that way, even in a non-sexual spanking.

I think the biggest point being made on this thread is that generalizations are pretty useless. We are complex creatures, each with our own individual motivations, desires and preferences.

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This is a complex one for me. Growing up in the early 80s I always presumed that if I was really bad I would have been spanked by my Dad. I genuinely feared the thought of that but was fascinated as well. As it turns out the only actual spanking I ever had as a kid was from a female teacher. The closest I ever came to being put over my Dads knee was when I was 10 but I was let off with a warning from my Mum. When I asked if he was going to do anything I was told “not this time”. That set my fantasies going and I did start at that point to begin to get exited about the thought of potential future spankings that might happen.

Because this affected me so much partly because of guilt I did a lot of work in therapy around this. Last year during one of the sessions my therapist asked me to imagine how the punishment might have happened if my Dad had chosen to spank me at 10. That really helped me and it feels like an alternative reality.

As an adult I wouldn’t say never to a guy spanking me but I would need to really trust them. I couldn’t guarantee that I wouldn’t get aroused by the process of spanking but my main focus would be on the punishment itself. I’d consider going over an older father figures knee if I felt the dynamic would work but at the same time I found the work I did in therapy has given me peace in terms of how I relate to my Dad in real life. 

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There is a couple of reasons why other guys are so hesitant to spank or be spanked by another man.  Reason 1 the huge society gender bias that exist women are giving a Lot more flexibility sexually.  Especially when they are young they get to experiment more, but when it comes to guys, you do 1 thing with another guy you get labeled Gay or at least Bi.   2.   Then there are guys that are so afraid of being labeled gay..

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6 hours ago, switcheroo said:

As a straight guy I spank both men and women. Just love the spanking scene. Spanking can be non-sexual.  I do enjoy seeing a butt turn red under my spanking hand but giving the spankee what he or she wants and needs is my goal.

This is exactly how I feel! Thanks for putting it into words!

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On 12/11/2019 at 7:12 AM, Melissa'sBottom said:

To give some background, I am a female who has been having some super fun spankings with another female friend.  As a woman on this site, you get bombarded with messages from guys.  All of them want to spank you.  Can I get an amen ladies?

It annoys the heck out of me when guys on this site tell me that it isn't sexual to them, and they just enjoy providing misbehaving girls with the discipline they need.  Oh, and by the way, they always insist that the discipline be bare bottomed.  Only because the discipline is more effective that way of course.  It totally has nothing to do with the fact that they want to be looking at a girls naked ass while they administer the spanking.  Like obviously everyone on this site gets turned on by spankings in some way or another.  Just admit it guys.  These same guys say that they would never spank another guy...  So obviously it is a sexual thing for them.  

So my main question is, given the obvious gender imbalance on this site and the spanking kink in general.  Why don't more guys do spankings with other guys?  I know it can initially be a little weird, but there are so many possibilities in this kink.  Surely there are ways for you straight guys to have a little fun with each other without crossing any lines you don't want to cross.  Us straight girls seem to have a lot of fun with each other...

I love this question! I have wondered why people who claim it's not sexual at all or that only give discipline spankings have such rigid rules on dress and gender boundaries.

I'm a straight female spankee and have never been spanked by another woman, but I've wondered what it would be like and would definitely give it a try if I had the chance. 

Spanking is absolutely a turn-on for me, but I'm generally not turned on by being spanked unless I'm sexually attracted to my spanker.

That wouldn't be an issue with a woman, so I don't see why I should have any qualms about it.

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I for one enjoy being otk with a guy spanking me hard. However, I would like to be spanked by a woman but so far I have had no offers.

I am straight but have no issues with a guy exploring me body whilst punishing me. Likewise, I have no issues with a woman doing the same. The main aspect of my enjoyment is this, I don't expect sex of any type and have never been offered either. Spanking for me is down to being controlled. I don't get sexually aroused either. All this being said, because I have never been asked for sex, should I be, what would i do? Not sure. Probably agree but trust me, I don't bend over for sexual gratification.  

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  • 1 month later...

This is a very interesting discussion. I am a straight male with a physiological need to be spanked disciplinary style. I have female friend who spanks me and we have never been sexually intimate. 

Due to my need for a serious punishment spanked, my ties me on a bed, with cushions under my groin area to elevate my ass. Both hands and feet are tied to the frame or bed posts in a manner that prevents me from freeing myself and forcing me to take the spanking with no means of stopping it.

I trust my friend and she has spanked me close to 75 times in the 6 years that we have known each other. She dictates the intensity and duration of the spanking and is very comfortable making me scream and cry. She provides me with a real punishment spanking, where I am at her mercy. I usually cannot sit comfortably after a session with her and my ass can bruised and welted for up to 2 weeks. She uses a belt, and strap on me.

I have never considered being spanked by a man, until ready the posting in this discussion. A spanked by a man intrigues me as a man can spank harder than a woman and this is something I am willing to try. My single primary is how to get comfortable being tied to a bed, naked, with my ass in a position of true submission. What says that I will not be taken advantage of by a male spanker. Put simply, what prevents me being raped after the spanking or at any time while restrained?

I have no desire for any type of sexual relations with a man and I would be afraid of the possibility of being taken advantage of in this situation. 

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I suspect that M/m spanking happens far more commonly than people might imagine, but that it is not discussed openly since there is an in-built (and, to my view, irrational) fear of being labelled as other than straight, which is still something of a taboo amongst many men. I would also venture to suggest that F/f spanking is viewed differently since it appears that quite a few males regard it as 'two for the price of one'. I have no hard evidence, but I have heard quite a lot of anecdotal support for this view.  

I have never crossed this line in adult life, but I am increasingly of the view that, as with any spanking (or other) relationship, provided that both spanker and spankee adhere to their agreed conditions, there is no reason why it should not be a good, enjoyable experience for both.

Maybe we should all be a little more coy, enjoy what we do privately and keep these intimate things to ourselves, which would deny the virtual critics their opportunity to snipe from the sidelines.

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Here's a different take: I'm female and straight and actually really dislike the idea of being spanked by a female or anyone that seems motherly because my mother was the most abusive person I've ever met, thing of my nightmares. While my dad was also abusive, he wasn't as aware of his own behaviors. My mother was very sadistic and knew she was causing harm and liked it. I wouldn't feel safe to submit to spanking or direction at all with a woman. Am I attracted to men yes, could spanking be something that turns me on sometimes yes but do I want that from all spanking partners, no. I think of discipline spankings and friendship, a lot of communication and trust but I simply feel safer with men weirdly enough, not in the risk of being raped. There's definitely going to be a bond there and closeness but it doesn't have to go to sex just because we both happen to be straight lol I am not a man but I'm sure the dynamics can be similar in, do they feel more safe opening up and submitting to a female or a male? Some of the spanking and discipline has a lot of emotional and psychological aspects but I can definitely attest to the flood of creepy messages as soon as I made an account ? about made me bolt lol definitely no matter what, talk to the person for awhile, not everyone is going to take advantage of you and one of the reasons I've stuck around was from hearing some of the men on the page be very serious on the forums about consent and limits but I'd still proceed with caution and go through all safety advice. Would I "never" let a female spank me? I don't know but I cringe at the thought, so why do it?

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I’m bi although I struggle with it due to the bullying I went through as a kid so kind of wish I wasn’t some days. Relationships are complicated enough without adding spanking into the picture. If I could I’d cut all these feelings out as they are just a nuisance. 

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I have always considered my self to be an equal “opportunity” Spanker. I will spank anyone I am comfortable being around after I have had a chance to get to know them. The Spanko lifestyle does not just appeal to the straight man or woman, the fit, the rich, the successful, but to people from all walks of life.  A person’s sexuality should not matter, but their character is another question, take a few minutes to get to know the person you’re going to spank or be spanked by; are they giving off vibes that you do not like? Time to move on!

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On 3/15/2021 at 2:43 PM, ukspanko said:

I’m bi although I struggle with it due to the bullying I went through as a kid so kind of wish I wasn’t some days. Relationships are complicated enough without adding spanking into the picture. If I could I’d cut all these feelings out as they are just a nuisance. 

Sorry, that you struggle with it. If you weren't bi, the bullies would have found another reason to bully you... that's what they do. There's nothing wrong with you. You are a good, thoughtful guy and that's really all that matters. Relationships are always complicated, doesn't matter if you are straight, bi or gay... it' s just harder when you add things like bi-sexuality; being a spanko etc. There are women and men who don't/won't have an issue with your sexuality... I won't dismiss bi men, as long as they are good men and aren't having sex with anything with a pulse! There are others, like me, who judge some-one on who they are as a person and don't really care about the rest of the complications! Keep your chin up and try not to see these feelings, which you can't help, as being a nuisance.  Focus on your good qualities and what you can do to enhance some-one else' s life. You'll make the right person an amazing partner?

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For me, particularly when I'm being spanked there is a sexual element to it. I do get turned on by both spanking and being spanked. Up to now I have only been spanked by women and I prefer to be naked when I'm disciplined ( it reminds me of my first spanking in my mid teens and remembering that excites me) I don't think I would rule out ever being spanked by another guy but do agree with some in this thread that there can be some pressure to engage. The reason I've not gone down that route so far is my own embarrassment as I know that immediately before a spanking as I'm stood naked being admonished, that I will become erect. It won't last long when the spanking starts but it's an obstacle for me if that makes sense?

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7 hours ago, Jeffd said:

For me, particularly when I'm being spanked there is a sexual element to it. I do get turned on by both spanking and being spanked. Up to now I have only been spanked by women and I prefer to be naked when I'm disciplined ( it reminds me of my first spanking in my mid teens and remembering that excites me) I don't think I would rule out ever being spanked by another guy but do agree with some in this thread that there can be some pressure to engage. The reason I've not gone down that route so far is my own embarrassment as I know that immediately before a spanking as I'm stood naked being admonished, that I will become erect. It won't last long when the spanking starts but it's an obstacle for me if that makes sense?

That makes a lot of sense. You are obviously not comfortable with a M-m spanking so just don' t do it. No-one's going to think anything less of you, for staying in your comfort zone? I'd never want to be spanked by a female... it's erotic for me, even if I'm not doing anything sexual, so I'm only comfortable with being spanked by men.

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On 3/19/2021 at 12:10 PM, BlackSATX said:

I have always considered my self to be an equal “opportunity” Spanker. I will spank anyone I am comfortable being around after I have had a chance to get to know them. The Spanko lifestyle does not just appeal to the straight man or woman, the fit, the rich, the successful, but to people from all walks of life.  A person’s sexuality should not matter, but their character is another question, take a few minutes to get to know the person you’re going to spank or be spanked by; are they giving off vibes that you do not like? Time to move on!

Indeed, well said.

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