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LateBloomer

What is meant by a 'good' spanking

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I get that.  Sometime st first opportunity (would have already happened, but she’s hours away so after New Year.  

Late 30s, last spanked at 11 and knows she desperately needs one.  

Yeah, I suspect she’ll feel about 11.  

I’m flattered by her trust.  

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6 hours ago, dmirk said:

I get that.  Sometime st first opportunity (would have already happened, but she’s hours away so after New Year.  

Late 30s, last spanked at 11 and knows she desperately needs one.  

Yeah, I suspect she’ll feel about 11.  

I’m flattered by her trust.  

Wow, I really hope that goes well for both of you!

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6 minutes ago, scorch said:

Wow, I really hope that goes well for both of you!

Me, too.  I had one fall apart (got cold feet) so I’m not getting completely confident until it happens.  

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I think that to me a good spanking means that I have being punished enough or have being disciplined enough. And, the way I know depends on how I act on a daily basis. Before a spanking, I'm always in a bad mood or acting out in a way where I get angry most of the time. And, after a spanking, I'm always in a better mood, just acting like a normal self. And, on all the spankings that I get, I feel relief because every time I see my redden behind, it reminds me to always be on my best behaviour.

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I don't think a good spanking neccesarily means it has to be a particularly hard one on some occasions. It can just be a memorable one as well.

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I think every ones idea of a good spanking is different, and sometimes a good spanking means a different thing same person, depending on the reason and mood in which it is given, My simple answer would be that a good spanking is one that does what it is intended to do, either punishment, erotic, or just fun, as long as both parties are happy or helped from it, then it is a good spanking, in my opinion.

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Very contextual. I've given a good spanking if the EE is happy with the outcome. Even if they aren't too pleased with the warm sting on their bottom immediately afterwards. When they reflect on the experience and it helps them that's a good one. Or if the context is diffrent we both have fun then thats a good one too!

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In a word: effective. 

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On 12/19/2018 at 2:40 PM, dmirk said:

In a word: effective. 

A spanking is effective or “good” if it disincentivizes misbehavior. The spankee realizes that whatever he/she was doing wrong is no longer worth the pain of a good spanking. Fear of future good spankings creates an incentive to be good instead of bad.

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2 hours ago, scorch said:

A spanking is effective or “good” if it disincentivizes misbehavior. The spankee realizes that whatever he/she was doing wrong is no longer worth the pain of a good spanking. Fear of future good spankings creates an incentive to be good instead of bad.

Agreed.

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On 12/16/2018 at 3:16 AM, ukspanko said:

A good spanking is a memorable one - both in intensity and the after effects.

I agree. I have been told I was going to get a "good" spanking, and I or my wife may say that I got a "good" spanking right afterwards, but you don't know that behavior has changed until much later. Yes, a "good" spanking is a "sound" spanking and a "thorough" spanking, but you know this because of the memorable intensity and effects. And a spanking has to be memorable to have any chance of changing behavior!

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I like the idea of equating 'good' with memorable. Of course that raises the question what is memorable. Your red and feel it for an hour, a few hours, a day,...

For me I can't tell if I've had a memorable spanking until later. Hard I can tell. The stings fades pretty quickly, but that does not mean I won't feel  it a couple to a few hours later. Either can be 'good', and/or 'effective' in reducing stress, but may or may not be memorable. only time will tell. I had hard spankings on Thursday and Friday. One or both of them are proving to be memorable. When I sit, my bottom reminds me?

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Well, I know when I get a good spanking. When I am getting spanked, I feel that the sting and the pain progresses along with the redness. At the end, I could see that not only the warmth and the sting but, also the soreness tell me that I got spanked real good and, on the spot. Sometimes, I feel like when I get a good spanking is when my sitting spot is real sore with a lot of pain and, a good spanking is also when I can't sit on a hard chair straight.

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On 10/22/2018 at 9:30 AM, Davyd said:

 

If it is a discipline one, the spanking would be good (I prefer effective) if it resulted in the ee not repeating the same mistake (s), at least for a while.

Davyd 

Absolutely. For me, it doesn't have to be brutal, just sufficiently sharp to cause me to reflect on my failings and to start to address them. 

Usually, even if I offend again, I find that an effective caning will reduce the frequency or magnitude of my offending (or both).

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To me a good spanking is one that takes you to the point that your desperate for it to be over, that your not sure you can handle another swat.  But it doesn't really matter ,because your not the one in charge. 

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In the phrase "a good spanking", such as in "What you need is a good spanking", I think the adjective "good" takes on a much different connotation than how its described in the dictionary. Good in most instances means: fine, okay, satisfactory, acceptable, adequate, not bad. But I hardly think that's what any spanker wants to dole out, or what any spankee wants to receive. Assume you only get to go out to dinner a few very special times a year, why wouldn't you want that experience to be exceptional, outstanding, extraordinary?  I think you would. And if you are only going spank or be spanked a few times a year (or for most of us, much less often than we'd like), why would we merely settle for 'good'. Shouldn't you otherwise demand "I need an exceptional spanking!", or threaten with "I'm going to put you over my knee and give you an outstanding, top-of-the-line spanking". Well, we don't because the adjective good is not meant to describe the 'quality' of the actual spanking. Rather I think, it implies that the spanking is richly deserved, is one you've had coming to you for a long time, is one in which you a re 'really going to get it', or as one poster suggested is "long overdue".   

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When she feels better after the spanking than before, it's a good spanking.  If she feels both better AND it met her expectations (chastised, punished, relieved of guilt or stress, is going to feel it for 5-6 days, brought to tears, has marks to remind her every time she looks in a mirror and bruises she feels every time she pull her panties up, or any combination she has requested) it's a very good spanking. 

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I have had females who have spanked me say "if you are bad, I'll spank you good!". I think a good spanking means that it was very sound and thorough and accomplished it's intended purpose. For instance, if I made a female friend mad and she spanks me good for it, then the good, sound spanking taught me a lesson. 

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To me, it has always meant that I did something wrong and I paid the price for it in return with a very thorough busted butt.  In the end I was very repentant and I showed that my lesson for the bad choice was learned as a result.  

I would say in the end....  Message delivered and message received.

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On 12/16/2018 at 11:43 AM, scorch said:

Since I’m a big athletic guy, punishment spankings typically need to be administered by another bigger, preferably older gentleman who can successfully handle me. That is a rare find. When I am pinned otk and the implement (usually an oversized ping-pong shaped plywood paddle) is raining smacks on my bare behind and I can’t move, can’t do anything but lie here and get my spanking, and I would do anything to make the stinging stop, and yet the spanks keep falling and the sting builds into a fire that pushes me past the point of tears, until I am truly sorry and got what I deserved, then it is effective.

 

On 12/16/2018 at 12:11 PM, dmirk said:

Finding big guys willing to do that must be as hard as finding female spankees for an M/F guy like me.  

 

On 12/16/2018 at 12:21 PM, scorch said:

Yes it’s mighty tough. However, when I do find the rare guy who can handle me physically, it makes me feel like a 14-year-old boy being spanked over his dad’s knee. That is kind of an amazing sensation.

i haven't really needed someone bigger or stronger than i am to give me a serious punishment paddling. So far, my most serious paddling came from a 5'5", 120-lb Woman 8 years younger than i was at the time. Other Women have paddled me, and gentlemen my size and smaller. i think an effective paddling is more about the paddler's attitude, determination, desire to paddle and punish, positions, implements, and techniques. Part of an effective punishment paddling is also my submitting to the paddler, and the paddler's dominant attitude.

Although OTK seems to be by far the most popular position, it isn't the most effective for a long, hard paddling. Having the spankee kneeling or bent over furniture, with the paddler standing to the side and slightly behind the spankee, probably offers and delivers the most effective, serious, long, and punishing paddling--one that can last several days to a few weeks. Surely, what is a good paddling varies with people, but i think a good paddling is one that really gets the message across (whatever that is), that really hurts and lasts several days to a few weeks, probably with redness, bruises, swelling, and maybe welts. A paddler who has given such a paddling can be satisfied that She/he delivered a good, sound, effective, memorable paddling. Also, a good paddling may be one that the paddler really enjoyed giving, and knew it was effective!

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For me a good spanking is a spanking that i administer to my self (because for now i just self spank) as precision spanking that is hard but not to hard that will cause focus on pain, red butt, warm butt, welts and it must be on bare butt (i would not have it any other way) but preferably with lowest amount of bruises (But i do count them as a possibility and if they occur i don't destroy my head space because of it) and will lead to strong endorphins flush in the body but not subspace strong (if that is even a possibility ???) so after a spanking when i am seating down i feel it for day or two and i am in this head space that i am content that i done it. 

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Not once have I ever heard of a "bad spanking", Not Ever.  🤣

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18 minutes ago, MrBottoms said:

Not once have I ever heard of a "bad spanking", Not Ever.  🤣

I actually have been threatened with "a really bad spanking", which meant pretty much the same thing as "you need a good spanking", LOL!

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For me it means that I can feel it for 2-3 days after and any marks take 5 days or so to fade (I heal very quickly)

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