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Is there such a thing....as a serious online disciplinarian?


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I need discipline. I have no self discipline and my husband doesn't discipline me enough. I feel out of control. Is there even such a thing as an online disciplinarian?

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There are people here who will do serious online discipline. I'm not one of them, however, because it's never seemed sufficiently real to have an effect on the disciplinee. But I have been platonic disciplinarian to women involved with or married to a non-spanker. Sometimes openly with their partner, but sometimes needing discretion, which I've always provided. It hasn't caused any breakups when the rules are well-established and things aren't rushed. Trust and safety are incredibly important.

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It can be serious depending on how seriously both parties take it...the issue is its hard to take someone on a 15inch screens seriously sometimes especially if the quality of video is not the best or there is lag. I mean in truth you won't really know until you try. 

Anyhow good luck :) 

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I definitely understand where you are coming from as I am also in a marriage with the same frustration. Feel free to let me know if you ever want to talk and Welcome.

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Side note I do not believe an effective discipline relationship mentoring can be achieved "online" per se. However once you find someone you trust, non-sexual, and committed to helping you with your discipline needs and goals then that is the most ideal scenario.

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Different point of views are always interesting as long as one does not become dogmatic. I have done a lot of online disciplining with folks in various countries thru the years. Some on Skype or yahoo, others just by email. Some worked well others did not. A lot depends on the situation of the ee--if one truly wants it to work-realistic living conditions where discipline is possible etc., It takes a certain mindset to be able to be accountable at distance, willing to self spank under orders or accept other disciplines.  But when it works it's great to know that one has been able to help someone:) 

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I've used online discipline with a number of women over the years. For some it has been very helpful. I do believe that if a person brings to it a feeling that this is what they want and need, it is far more likely to be successful. Like just about anything, what you can get out of something is proportional to what you put into it. I'm certainly open to inquiries from anyone who wants to discuss further.

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  • 1 month later...
On 3/26/2018 at 4:11 AM, Nicanorr said:

 I mean in truth you won't really know until you try. 

This is what I have been wondering, like OP I would like some online spanker to guide me but I have never done it before... It probably won't be like the real thing but it's better than nothing I do suppose. 

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It is my belief that there is ALWAYS something that one can get out of online discipline. but as said in previous posts, it all depends on what each pouts into it.

There is a reason why the BRAIN is the most trusted and largest and strongest muscle on the body.

 

Mindset is definitely the key! having a pure and clear mindset of expectations can carry anyone far through their discipline.

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  • 8 months later...
  • 2 months later...

A lot of people will knock online discipline over,  that's they'r prerogative.  But,  if it works for you, excellent!  I've seen it work,  done ans experienced online, ans it is nice when your other options are limited.  

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That is legit.  I don't believe in a bit of it, and some want pictures and videos from you to check on things.  Avoid them.

Otherwise, what works for the individual varies.

It's not a full substitute for the real thing.

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On line, you can control everything, and you can walk away any time you want to. It's easy to get bored, and that's not the point of discipline. Read a book on how to improve yourself. Join a forum about whatever it is about yourself that you feel a need to correct. Or see a licensed therapist. Or see a live disciplinarian who offers a continued support program which involves both on-line and live discussions.

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I’ve somewhat changed my position.  Because I was asked to consider, agreed, and it went well.  

It’s not a substitute for in person, but if both parties take it seriously, it beats nothing by a lot!

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  • 7 months later...

Online mentoring, working long term can happen but it’s rare.  I wouldn’t waste time doing online mentoring again.  You build this deep friendship/relationship.  Meet in person.  It’s all good.  True colors come out later, and you see how much of your life you wasted.   Live and learn.  From now on it’s real life from the start or nothing for me.  

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