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redarsed

Benefits of self spanking

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Many spankers question wether self spanking can be as effective for discipline as being spanked by a mentor. I think that it is more effective.

As an adult it is extremely difficult to find someone to spank you. Finding someone who believes in mentoring for discipline is even more difficult. Despite all this talk of how self spanking is ineffective, for most spankers it is simply the only option.

But assuming you have found a local disciplinarian, what does your spanking involve? Agreeing on what behaviour requires a spanking. Informing the person when the behaviour occurs. Visiting the person in private and accepting the spanking. At every stage you must put in effort to bring about the spanking. Why not go one stage further? Give the spanking to yourself. 

Even if you do manage to find this person and the spanking helps your behaviour to improve? What then? You become reliant on this person to discipline you. You are dependent on them for you own well being. What if they move away or become busy. As an adult this kind of dependence on an outsider is totally unacceptable.

Self spanking is not the best way to achieve self discipline through spanking, it is the only way.

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I don't agree it's the only way to achieve self discipline but I think it can be a useful tool. I've used it on myself to deal with guilt over issues in my past and I've been spanked by others as well which was more about catharsis. I tend to see things in grey. I think you're right that it doesn't help in life to depend too much on anyone but at the same time developing trust and good relationships is worthwhile.

 

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Nothing at all can compare to being punished in person, no on line no self punishment means not getting out of anything, in on line and self punishment you have to honestly and seriously commit otherwise what is the point.

Yes for many meeting in person is not an option and on line or self are your only choices, but regardless you have to commit.

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I agree with Midnight.  I've tried the self punishment route, but find that it pales in comparison to the real thing.

My recommendation is to talk with your significant other about it.  Or, if you don't have a significant other, focus on getting one first.  It's not as difficult to find somebody to spank you as you think, and our interest / fetish is nowhere near as rare as you think.

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On 11/19/2017 at 8:47 AM, redarsed said:

Even if you do manage to find this person and the spanking helps your behaviour to improve? What then? You become reliant on this person to discipline you. You are dependent on them for you own well being. What if they move away or become busy. As an adult this kind of dependence on an outsider is totally unacceptable.

You do have a point. For sure the ideal is self control, self management of one's life, making it by oneself.. BUT for many the ideal does not work. They get going, stumble all over their goals often very quickly and then get back into bad habits they hate. 

As one who had done a lot of mentoring, and directing self spankings to help them I am a realist. Better to help someone struggling who for a while may need some help then to be dogmatic and state they should do it by themselves.

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I am looking for a disciplinarian/mentor to give me spankings so that way I can get the full effect of a spanking.  I need someone that will call be on the behaviors that I need to change.  I have done the self-spankings.  I even bought a paddle but I don't cry or even feel it when I go to sit down.  For me, I know that I really do need to have someone to do my spankings.  I hope to find someone in Oklahoma that will be able to do it for me.

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I've spanked a LOT of people, for a lot of reasons, over the years.  In my opinion, it's tough enough to stay over the knees for a spanking which is properly hard enough and properly hard enough.  Good spankings hurt.  While I've met some folks with incredible willpower, I've never met anyone who could spank themselves properly.  But, I'm sure there are those who disagree.

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1 hour ago, Keith Lemontree said:

I've spanked a LOT of people, for a lot of reasons, over the years.  In my opinion, it's tough enough to stay over the knees for a spanking which is properly hard enough and properly hard enough.  Good spankings hurt.  While I've met some folks with incredible willpower, I've never met anyone who could spank themselves properly.  But, I'm sure there are those who disagree.

Well said indeed. No question about it. I’m sure there is some extremely rare unicorn out there. But I certainly haven’t ever met them. 

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Hmmm does that mean I'm a rare unicorn or just a partial rare unicorn?

I've done a self spanking more thoroughly than one guy has spanked me.  And no, it's not because he didn't do a good job lol.

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34 minutes ago, Poison's said:

Hmmm does that mean I'm a rare unicorn or just a partial rare unicorn?

You're a rare partial unicorn. 

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9 hours ago, Poison's said:

Hmmm does that mean I'm a rare unicorn or just a partial rare unicorn?

I've done a self spanking more thoroughly than one guy has spanked me.  And no, it's not because he didn't do a good job lol.

I don’t doubt that you are that rare unicorn. 😉

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