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OK. maybe sane and crazy are a bit strong, but I came to a realization that has me wondering once again 'Am I the only one?'. Not spanking, I know am not and you folks have helped me, through my posts and reading others, accept this side of me. Rather it is the reason why I self spank, and as often as I can. I am fortunate enough to have found a therapist, who I'm not sure is totally 'kink friendly', but is also not judgmental and asks good inciteful questions about this. Earlier this past week we spoke about the role spanking plays in my life; stress relief, feeling at peace, calmer, more focused, etc. That got me thinking and I realized that those are just attributes of what I'm feeling, especially after a good hard spanking, they are not the full picture. The full answer is that a spanking enables me fully let go of my emotions. Sometimes more so then others, and sometimes it takes a hard spanking to do that and other times an easier session gets me to the same result. The problem, is that made me realize that for the past year especially, and more then that, my main coping mechanism in this crazy world has been paddling my own bottom, and probably too often, and too hard. I can't decide if that being what has helped me cope is normal or just plain just sad or pathetic. Please tell me I'm not the only one for whom being spanked is a (or the) major psychological coping mechanism. Maybe it is the times we live in. The frequency and severity have definitely increased in the last year. The pain helps me let go, and that makes me feel better at least for awhile. And the period of time in which I feel better and normal, is wonderful almost beyond words. Is that crazy? Is what is keeping me sane, driving me crazy?

I have questions to does of you who used cane for spanking and/or self spanking. How do you use cane the correct way during self spanking? Do you know any videos that are a good tutorial about self spanking and usage cane? Or maybe a blog with good tutorial with pictures?

As a spanker, I do not understand this concept. Understand the need to be spanked might be so strong spankees feel the need. The art of positioning must awkward, impacting in the right place and with the right force must be difficult. Would imagine it would leave the spankee dissatisfied. Am I wrong?

Hi naughty spankees, You've committed all kinds of naughty misdeeds this week & now it's time to pay. Confess 1 or 2 misdeeds on this thread and I'll assign you a directed self-spanking punishment that fits the crime. From trivial offenses like flirting with a married person to serious offenses like missing a deadline, I'll make sure that the bare-bottom punishment fits the crime! Any confession posted by midnight EST will be answered ASAP. In the meantime, Happy Spanking!

I'm asking for a friend who wants help self spanking and she suggested a homemade self spanking machine. Neither of us know how to make one of these and would be open to suggestions/designs or help. It would be nice if it had a trigger she could hold down which caused the spanking to continue until she let go. Nothing fancy, and the implement attached isn't terribly important as long as it hurts. This should hopefully help her overcome the "This feels stupid" feeling that self spanking often produces. Any advice in that area would be nice as well. Thank you!

On this site, and other things I've seen and read; there seem to be some myths around self spanking. I'd like to try to put some facts around those myths, fully realizing that this is one person's perspective, and your mileage may vary. Let me address this from two types of spankings. I self spank for stress relief and relaxation the vast majority of the time, very infrequently for discipline. So I'll address stress relief spanking first. Myth #1: Self spanking doesn't work. I can attest that it does. It has taken time and effort to get to where I am now, but like anything else in life if you want something you have to work at it. I've had a fascination with spanking for a long time. When I figured the only way to get it was to do it myself I tried. The first many many times, I tried self spanking with my hand. That did not work. I read a ping pong paddle can be effective. Not for self spanking. Over time I moved on to heavier implements, and read and refined my technique to the point where I could give myself a good sound spanking. I can talk about implements in another post. The main point here is self spanking can work, it might just take a lot of trying different things, and quite a number of ineffective spankings until you find an approach that works for you. Myth #2: You cannot spank your self as hard and someone else can spank you. On an absolute scale I cannot in all honesty say yes or no. What I do know is that I can give myself spankings that hurt and leave me sitting uncomfortably for a day or two. Whether those are hard spankings or light spankings will vary by person. The key is, that as a self spanking they meet my personal needs, hence they are hard enough for me. Personally I do not always feel I need a hard, or long spanking to achieve my goal of relaxation. A lighter spanking or short spanking works also. For me ir depends on how I am feeling at a given time. Myth #3: Loss of Control This is a hard one. Personally I do not have the need to turn control over to another person. I can simulate some level of loss of control of the spanking by randomizing the spanking length or implements used or time by setting a timer and leaving it out of sight. If you have a need for submission, then self spanking may not work for you. Luckily for me, I do not have that need. I have also learned through practice to separate in my mind between the giving (watching how and where the spanks land and effect, and counting spanks), from the receiving (the sensation I experience andthe sound). During the spanking, while the first is occurring and has to for safety sake, the second part is where my mind is focused. That is where I shift from the every day to a focus on what is happening to my bottom (versus what I am doing to it). Just a few thoughts, on what works for me at least. Other views are welcome.

Has anyone ever been able to make your self cry during a self spanking? I have not been able to, but there was 1 time years ago I came Very Very Close. I wanted to keep going until I started to cry but it hurt so bad I could't continue. I forgot what I did wrong but I was very mad at my self and I gave my self a Very hard spanking... If you ever made your self cry with a self spanking please explain.

Hello all! I'm 31, female, currently living in the USA (MST) but not looking for any face-to-face discipline. I am looking for guided self-spanking as I am trying to stay on top of daily and weekly tasks. Also looking for other spanko friends. Nice to meet y'all.

What do you find is best position to get a good punishment? Do you have a mentor or just discipline yourself? Do you find it effective? I'm getting better but I know its mild in comparison to what I'll get when I get a real life spanking

Hello guys! I am an 18 year old spankee just here to introduce myself. I used to be spanked by my girlfriend but after a rough breakup, with all other issues aside, I crave the need for spankings again - mostly for stress relief. This seems like a decent forums, and I hope to have a good time here!

Hello, I used to self-spank, but it has not had the same satisfaction as a real one from my ex. At the same time though, I don't feel comfortable with physically meeting up with someone on here and would prefer to be guided in self spanking for now. I like being spanked sort of erotically, but also as stress relief and discipline. I also don't like the "overt sexualization" of other sites and lack of intimacy, which is why I came to this site. Private message me if you're a female spanker willing to assist me in "online spanking," thanks.

So I'm wondering as someone who has only self spanked so far what are the bigdifferences in the two? My last self spanking was VERY effective and its over 24 hours later and I still feel it. For anyone that's had both what are the big differences? Especially in pain and how long you feel it after? Curious before I get my first administered spanking!!

Hi I'm new here. I'm married and not looking for anything sexual . For now I want to start self disciplining but need a mentor. I do not want to send pictures just talk online. Most of my discipline will be for weight loss but maybe some other things I need help with improving too.. I am very self conscious and a shy person.

i'm a 18 yo girl and i've done some really bad stuff and i think i must write this can anybody be my mentor and give me self spanking tasks? please, help me, i need it a lot

Mature, serious Disciplinarian, expert in assigning self-spanking directives to women for the purposes of discipline, behaviour modification or erotic stimulation.

I was feeling naughty so played hooky the other day instead of getting some work done. I posted about it in a self spanking group and got the following punishment order: "Procrastinating on work isn't good, so I recommend a total of 100 on each cheek with a wood spoon and then standing in the corner for 30 minutes before you repeat the 100 per cheek with the wooden spoon. That should help with your procrastinating on work." So 400 (!) spanks with the wooden spoon, plus a half hour of corner time?! That seems way out of proportion to me, does this seem fair to you?!

I've been very naughty.. Someone please assign me a position and a number of spankings. I have a cane, and a kik (laaaaake) < that's five a's.

So, totally regretting my actions now... Have some things I'm trying to work on and I fell into them again and now I'm being punished for it. If anyone is looking for a good long punishment, use Capzasin-HP. This is also known as a "silent spanking." from what I've read on the interwebs. I hurt my foot yesterday really badly, enough to be out of work for at least the next week, maybe longer if it's not just a strain, and when my mom got home we got into it cause I can't handle when she starts asking how I could do this again. I've broken both of my feet back in high school, two different church events about 2 years apart actually lol, and this one was another church event. -.- So yeah, she wasn't angry at me but I took it the wrong way. That being said my last self-spanking experience had left me bruised for the past week. I've been doing research on how to prevent that in the future but I am still waiting for them to heal before I give myself a more serious punishment for falling into what I'm trying to work on. So I'm stuck using the Capzasin cream. 30 mins bare bottom on the bed laying down on my stomach and my butt began to warm right quick. The pain has only increased from there. Now I have no idea what a really serious spanking feels like, or one at all for that matter. But if this is what a person could do to me then I sure as heck never want to be over that knee! Sit spots are the absolute worse too cause when I'm not actually sitting the skin bunches up and holds the heat in more and when I am sitting it holds the heat in more... Walking is the only little relief I can get from it... my butt actually began turning a little pink and I didn't event give myself a swat. So yeah, regretting my actions now -.-. Worse off the pain isn't going to go away until at least late tomorrow or the following day. The last time I did this for a much smaller offense and when I reached my pain threshold I ran to shower to clean it off. Hurt quite badly comin off too but after about an hour it finally went away. I nearly started crying cause I was in so much pain. I know for this punishment though I'm going to have to keep the cream on until it wears off and possibly longer until I can give myself the spanking that I need. Hopefully, I'll remember this next time I want to choose to do this action cause I never want to have to experience this again! -.-

Help!!!! I do directed self spankings with my Master watching and telling me how many swats with what implement and where to apply said swats via Skype. Yesterday, I had my first spanking in almost three months and towards the end my left arm was KILLING me!!!! (I alternate between the two hands right hand right cheek/sit spot/thigh left hand left cheek/sit spot/thigh) Anyways, I was wondering/hoping all of you fantabulous people here could give me some advice or pointers that might help me be able to not be in agony by the end of my spanking. I'm referring to my arm(s) being sooo sore I can barely lift them NOT my backside as I know THAT is SUPPOSED to be sore and tender - just the way it is should be. I noticed I had this problem with my last spanking which was back in July. I'm not sure if it's the LOOOOONNG periods of time between my spankings, the number of swats overall, the weight of the implement (the same implements weren't used this time - we were breaking in a new toy), if I'm just THAT out of shape and getting OLD (don't you dare say it's because I'm getting old!) or some combination of the afore mentioned ideas. Or if you come up with another idea as to the cause I'm all ears (not to be confused with all rears as we AAAALLLLLLLL know my rear is ... ample Unfortunately, the reason for the few and far between spankings are NOT due to my obvious angelicness. It's been because of emotional issues on my part and my marvelous Master recognizing and respecting my need for space and time to figure out my ... stuff ... (stuff is NOT the word I WANT to use but as we aren't allowed to swear in here and I hate using asterisks to replace a letter in the actual word I wish to use I'll just use a generic word that basically means the same thing but won't get me in trouble) Thank you for reading this and I look forward to hearing what you think and suggested solutions!!!!

I spank myself when I think I need it, since there's no one around to do it for me. I've been doing a lot of bad spank-worthy things lately, and even other people have noticed my brattiness. I usually lay face down and give myself 20 swats with a brush or a thin piece of plastic that stings a bit. I'm 21, far too old to be disrespecting my co-workers, and many of them are fed up with it. I swore about 10 times in front of my boss too! That really pissed him off! I'm always late to work and have blown off my friends lately. I just need a little pain in my ass to remind me not to be so disrespectful to the people kind enough to help me out. But now I need someone to maybe walk me through how to spank myself properly for my ass-hole behavior that may make me lose my job. How many swats should I do? And with what? I don't have a good belt so that's off limits. But any comments would be much appreciated. Thank you. -jenny

I am very naughty I curse a lot and never study when i should Someone should tell me what I deserve!

In my youth my younger sister and I would give each other spankings, pre adolecense so sex was not part of the second course. As I got older it became more difficult to find someone of either gender to engage in spankings and I really enjoyed giving and or getting as part of foreplay. At one time I engaged in self spankings and that was missing so many of the elements that make spanking so exciting and thrilling. For the last time, trying to find someone to share the experience.