mozartpc21

So let me cut right to the chase: I live in the Philadelphia area in a house mostly by myself (I split custody of my son with my ex-wife), I cannot relocate, I have family ties that are important and immovable, and stable employment with more than reasonable pay (low six figures) and great health and retirement benefits doing meaningful work. I want a woman who shares my values, someone with whom I feel that spark of mutual attraction, and who has a passion for spanking, who understands it, who loves to be spanked.

I really want to meet a woman who fills me emotionally, who meets all of my needs, and I want to meet all of her needs. And I am very, very, very into spanking. I am in a friends with benefits situation now, but that is all it is, or will ever be. While I look, there is no reason not to continue, as finding someone who meets all of these criteria and who lives in my area or is willing to relocate to my area might be a nearly impossible task.

What am I like? I think my best qualities are my intelligence and easy going adaptability. But I am intelligent, I believe, without being pretentious. I hate snobbery, though I like insightful and thoughtful things.

I have many interests and I am very adaptable. On the "high" end, I like art, film, literature, philosophy, and particularly political science as it manifests in philosophy and literature. On the "everyday" end I love pop art, movies, baseball, old computers and video games (like REALLY old).

MOST of all, among things that are not spanking that I have a passion for, I REALLY like socializing and talking with and learning about people. EFNJ on the Meyers Briggs scale and really a huge extrovert, but also at least a little reserved despite this. This means I like being with people but not being the center of attention necessarily. I would love to meet a woman who just likes to talk about life and almost anything. Great conversation is so engaging and important for me.

And so what about the reason we are all here, my "fetlife"?

I LOVE spanking. I am at heart a one woman man who is looking for that special lady who seeks a deep emotional connection, AND, who understands my love of spanking, who needs to be spanked as much as I need to spank her. I love, just love, to give a good old-fashioned bare bottom spanking.

And spanking for me is, as I have seen a few people on here say, basically an orientation. I love sex, but I love spanking too. They go hand in hand. I am a "pure" spanko, as I have seen others put it. This means that while I am open to trying other things with a willing partner, if it pleases her, I am not going to "graduate" from spanking to BDSM in a broader sense. I love spanking, and the interplays that it creates. I love spanking for discipline, and spanking for discipline is a pleasure.

I also like to write spanking erotica. I have written quite a bit of it, particularly in the last year, and the more recent things - from about February of last year or so - until now are, in my estimation, better. I have shared a little bit of it here; if you are interested to see more, you can feel free to ask for my email, and I will share with you off of this site.

Currently I am in what amounts to a friends with benefits situation, but it's never going to be anything more than that, and that isn't what I want. It will do, for now, but but if you are a woman, and you're looking for a real, long-term commitment: so am I. I am an emotional sort and that emotional connection is as important to me as the spanking.

Now, with all of that said ladies, I know what you are thinking:

Well that's all well and good, but where, oh WHERE, are the dick pics?

You'll never see any here. In some ways I am downright boring and conservative when it comes to sex. I have strong senses of propriety, boundaries, privacy, and dignity - I want to treat any woman I am with as a lady, and behave as a gentleman. Discretion is important; I want to be open with a partner, but things between a partner and myself are for us, not the whole world.

I do NOT want or expect to be in a relationship where I am in charge and treating my partner like a child. I do NOT want a slut or a slave or to debase anybody; I am a nice person and value respect and respectful treatment of others highly. I consider myself a feminist, and enough of a feminist to understand how spanking can be seen as problematic within feminism, and more how many men who self-declare as feminists are often themselves problematic. I have read Simone de Beauvoir and consider myself a REAL feminist, who sees that sometimes, as with all men brought up in a patriarchal society, that sometimes even my behaviors do not always match my conscious intent. I will learn from those when called out on it.

I just also happen to love spanking. I must have someone who does, and really understands it. It's the only way I can be truly happy, or make someone else truly happy. And I long to do both.