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Everything posted by nicoleS39

  1. We were at a wedding reception tonight. My goodness...more like a wild party!

    I am glad to say...I did not touch a drop of alcohol, but it was flowing very freely. With it all around me, in times past I have felt "the pull"...but not this time. Of course, my husband was at my side, but honestly...even if he had not been, I think I would have still refrained. The younger women there got so slammed....shaking their butts in tight short dresses, throwing themselves at men...a couple of them actually wound up on the floor after "dancing":with a bottle of booz in their hand!

    Lol..I found myself kind of wishing "somebody" who knows them would give their butts a good hide tanning...but probably...that just  not happen...lol.

    My husband was Best Man, but he does have a wild party streak in him. My husbandnis not a party animal at all, so it isv somewhat a delightful mystery they are close friends of many years. We hung around for most of the "reception"...and participated in the normal things...my husband gave a great best man speech and raised a toast...but eventually he squeezed my hand and led out with him quietly. 

    So glad to enjoy the quiet peace of our hotel room...and snuggle to sleep with the man who has chosen to take me as his woman. I am grateful for who he is...and who he is helping me become.

    Tonight did serve as a reminder...though..to me. As I observed these young women tonight....ya know...there go I too, but for the grace of God...and my husband's belt.

    1. Show previous comments  1 more
    2. nicoleS39


      I believe you misunderstood me.

      I was not judging...and I certainly did not call them sluts or refer to them as such. I did not say or do a thing to hinder their partying or drinking or dancing. In fact, I love all kinds of dancing and know how to party hardy myself...lol. Trust me, I have done my share and probably took it much further than these young women probably would.   I am just saying...now the "older"...or more "mature" me...lol...is a bit more in the observing mode....and  I have honestly never been to a wedding reception quite as "wild" as this one....oh my goodness. Two of them were so smashed they were rolling on the ground with all their under garments in full view...lol...skirts above their waist.

      My comments about somebody giving their hides a good tanning...well..that just comes from my background as a spanko person in a disciplinary framework. It was just "spanko" thought...momentary brief fantasy. Their real need afterwards was a safe trip home and a good sleep and something to help their stomach...lol...this I know well myself.....lol

      But...yes...the drinking issue for me is important....and there was a time this type of environment would have triggered a relapse back into alcoholism for me...personally. I was just kind of saying I was glad that did not happen...even with all the alcohol and wildness flowing all around me.





    3. rubyredd


      I know you didn't say anything to them - but it is the idea that these women having a good time, dancing, drinking, "throwing themselves" at guys - you made it all sound very negative. I have never understood why that bothers people. It mainly seems to bother them when other women do it. And that makes no sense to me. 

      I have fantasies about people getting spanked - and I think most spankos do. But one thing that really turns me off is any type of slut-shaming (I know you didn't use the word - it is the implication) or shaming for what are pretty normal human behaviors. One behavior that always makes me wish someone would get spanked is when people are rude to others. Honestly, it is the only time I imagine a vanilla being spanked. When people don't say please or thank you...ugh! 

      I am glad you were able to practice self-control - because no amount of spanking or outside controls can make an alcoholic stop drinking. It has to come from within. Not saying spanking might not help, but the truth is... it is easy to fall into old behaviors if you don't have self-control. And I am glad you didn't feel tempted this time. 

    4. nicoleS39


      Sorry my "tone" seemed harsh or judgmental. Not my intention. I am certainly not against other women...or....men...having a good time...and drinking and dancing are certainly part of that. I really like to see others have a good time....and I like to have good times too. It was just as I watched all this unfolding amomg a few more "hearty partiers"....it "reminded" me of my days when my fun and party was more driven by alcohol then actually enjoyment. I did some things that really....were not fun in the end...but regretful. Being out of control, does not necessarily mean one is having a good time, at least in my experience...lol.

      I say a couple of these young women were "throwing" themselves at a few young men...they really were...just like I used to do....and I felt a personal sadness for them regarding the possibility they may not like what happened...after the booz wears off. It happened to me often...lol. And yes, there are two sides to this coin. The men were not resisting in any way...lol...and understandable...except....it just deemed like they were more kind of " making fun" of these young women, then maybe being kind.

      lol...  I not a "holier than thou" type of person. And I know that many can drink and party and be safe. I do not begrudge them that. I think I have finally learned to do that...but in my personal case...it has to be sober. When I saw them unable to stand and rolling on the floor...it just triggered my past...and not all of that was so good. I was concerned for their safety... but I also recognize we all make our choices...as did I.

      And yes...I totally agree...my husband's belt does not cure me of alcoholism. It is my will, and for me, my faith in God and reliance on His strength...that wins the battle. But yes...in our almost entirely disciplinary dynamic...it honestly has "helped" me sustain sobriety....as I choose to be held accountable on that...to my husband as well as myself.

      Sorry if I upset you. But like you have said, we each have our own story. Mine is probably weirder, but in no way better,  than most...lol.


  2. Personally, I prefer that my husband responds as he deems best...which is exactly what he does. I "sometimes" get wet during an OTK bare bottom spanking, but our dynamic is disciplinary. He "has" noticed...and we have discussed this happening now and then. It is actually kind of a "new" development only within the last 4 or 5 years. Thus far, he ignores it completely and continues the discipline...regardless. We have "experimented" with using OTK as foreplay to sexual intimacy, but it just does not work for us. What we have discovered is this...He has used his belt....in a shortened "single blade" grip to strike my breasts and pussy with a slight reddening and sting that I find very stimulating and arousing....but that is not "punitive" and actually is an intentional sexual "treat" for me. It is "delightfully" painful to some degree, and always sends me over the top...lol... I guess it is a dominant sexual expression that really sparks my submissive sexual nature....I dunno. But...like I said, those "spankings" do not even touch my bottom...lol...and are not disciplinary in nature at all for us. There's just something about that which really arouses us both.... sexually. So...."sometimes" my real OTK disciplinary spankings may include me becoming aroused or even having orgasm...but he continues to spank me for discipline as he sees fit....and I have noticed....when such occurs....he makes sure to delay taking me sexually for a longer period of time afterwards when such occurs during some of my times over his knee. So....I may be "wet", but my satisfaction from him taking me is denied until it is on his terms, not mine. My disciplinary punishment does not earn me the pleasure of his manhood...at least for awhile.
  3. The cane is definitely one way my husband keeps me in line. It is not something I get regularly, but when I do...it "speaks" volumes to me...lol.
  4. Thankful and grateful...to my God, my husband, my children, my in laws, my friends and clients at work, my church, and my work and opportunity to serve, freedom and living in such a wonderful country and rural area and home...and thankful for all of my dear special friends here who put up with this mess I am, and with whom I can share and learn things not possible in any other community I live. Thank you sincerely. Every day I say a prayer for those in prison. It is especially hard, I know...during holidays. The walls are still gray.

    1. rubyredd


      Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

  5. @rubyredd....Wow....the brush made you "purple". I have never experienced a spanking with a brush. I have viewed a few videos on ST, but it just does not "seem" to be capable of producing those severe results. Obviously...I am wrong....lol.
  6. My most memorable? Well, I am going to answer that more along the lines of most "life changing" or pivotal. A few "spankings" come to mind as more memorable because of the severity and timing, but my most "life changing" was not the most severe by any means. My most memorable was when my husband and I were "officially" dating. I could not believe someone like him would even be interested in someone like me. I was everything one would "think" he would despise in a woman. I was not pretty...kind of pudgy...terribly groomed...had some bad teeth. I was rude...cursed lots...a heavy smoker. I dressed like a slut and pretty much acted like one. I only did church because my cousin said I had to attend every Sunday or I would not be allowed to live with them. I hadca terrible past He...was very fit...handsome...smart...and very decent...kind. I knew his first wife had died of a stroke, leaving two young children...and...the photos I saw of her...she was a beautiful woman....and I was told...nothing at all like me. Well....I realized he could be the best thing ever for me, so I decided to "trap" him...I would do what I knew how to do best at that time. I would seduce him...and maybe het him to marry me...then I could divorce him and get money from him..and move on. Well, I starting seducing him the third date....wearing sexy things...enticing him. He did not bite on my bait...lol...and just got upset. My cousin warned me to not "blow it" with him, that he was a very good man. And...I was so afraid he would quickly grow disinterested in me. Well..the 4th date, I came on really strong...slipping his slipper down and feeling up his manhood...which felt good and strong...btw....lol. We were in a park near my cousin's place where I lived, sitting on a park bench....he wanted to just talk and discuss some things....but not me. Well, I obviously surpassed his limit on patience and understanding with that move...and next thing I know he has me over his leg and trapped with his other leg, and he is spanking me very hard with his hand on my butt and my upper thighs....telling me to learn to behave and such. After he quit and plopped me back on the ground, I was just shocked and surprised as I knelt there. Yes...shocked by him spanking me...because that was totally unexpected...but also by me...because I realized for the first time...I actually "needed":a strong man like he was, and I deep-down "liked" that he actually "spanked" me. I set back down on the bench next to him, and we just set there in silence. After a few minutes, he apologized...but really felt like I deserved it, and said he would walk me home...and would not bother me anymore. Well....I did not know what to say. He walked me to the house...and I was just not knowing what to say at all..,then. But...during a sleepless night I decided I would call him and tell him it was OK...and beg him to please continue seeing me. I wanted him in my life. So...him spanking me that first time was like an awakening regarding my "need" for spanking as an adult and my need for a man like him. I grew into love with him after that, and we had many long talks a out our pasts and what we needed in from one another in our relationship with one another. I began to submit more to his expectations after that. He bought me clothing that was modest and feminine...and quit trying to seduce him and basically behaving like the slut I was. That first spanking...not at all "severe" in comparison to many others I have received since then....was the beginning of a wonderful relationship with my husband and fostered huge changes....as a process began...in my life.
  7. My husband and me have taken a long road trip to Texas where he is best man in the wedding of a close Marine buddy friend of his. So...a few days away from work and all the chores at home. Not used to having some "down time" like this and spending time in hotels and restaurants, but it is a nice break I guess. This will be the first time away from our family for Thanksgiving he took me as his wife, so a little different and sad...but its ok. Tonight is the "bachelor":party, and the bachlorette party. It is my husband's friend's second marriage, butbthe lady he is marrying has never been married before...hence the big venue marriage thing.  Husband and me are not real partiers, and I am a recovered alcoholic....so I will be on my personal guard. Husband told me to just walk out if I need to....we explained it to the bride's sister who is throwing the party.

    1. insearchofotk20


      Grateful recovering alcoholic myself. Almost five years sober coming up. Weddings with alcohol are really tough, so take care of yourself. Has being spanked helped your sobriety? I have not had a real spanking since being sober. but I'd like to get back to it.

      Have a good time, be safe!

    2. nicoleS39


      @insearchofotk....Thank you so much for sharing. You understand how challenging wedding things can be. Normally my husband is right there with me, but not this time. He told me he believes in me and...run away if I feel tempted. It is just that I am kind of expected to be there by the bride...

      For me personally...yes...I honestly do believe being spanked has helped me to maintain sobriety. First...I decided I hated living as an alcoholic and drug addict and prostitute. That "started" while I was in prison, but continued after my release and living with my cousin and her husband. But...I was starting to slip back on drinking...and met my "husband to be" about then. So...my decision to want to quit...God's grace as I depended and trusted in Him for the first real time in my life....and my husband's love and believing in me...and his belt which he liberally used if I slipped or made bad decisions to jeopardize my sobriety....So...yes...I believe others will tell you different...but in my personal case....his belt has indeed helped me sustain sobriety, not slip, and has a couple of times brought me back when I fell. Let me just say...for "me"...I do not think I would be a grateful recovering alcoholic and drug user, and  prostitute "without" his strength and his belt in my life.

      I was very involved with a program called Celebrate Recovery through what was then my husband's church....which is now mine. That helped me grow in Jesus alot, and being around others with similar challenges.


    3. nicoleS39


      Well...an update. I did not drink one drop last might. Just sipped on a sparkling water the entire evening...but my " creative" husband did help me out. Before we each departed our hotel room for the respective parties, he hugged me in my under things, had me take off my panties, then put his belt on my bottom and pulled me into his warm, long hug...whispered assurance to me as we kissed...and then and fastened his belt around my waist, so it was touching bare skin. He told me "this" was a reminder of what "would" surely come...."if" I drank any alcohol...as soon as we returned to our home a few days after the wedding...and it would be very severe. And I would wear this belt like this as a reminder every minute until we returned home, and he could get me alone to take it off and take it to me hard and long.  I have had my share of more severe spankings this year, this year...to be quite honest, so this was a strong "reminder" to continue my sobriety.  But, then...he did something "new" to us. He had somewhere bought or made...who knows....these plastic spike discs...for lack of a better term. They were sewn all over the insides of the black panties he had me put on. Not metal or anything, but kind of like the underside of a car mat. Indefinitely knew they were there, and of course "knew" mor so when I sat.  I kind of had to do little "adjustments" the entire evening, but I think was not noticed. Most the girls were drinking pretty freely, so....for me it was good they were getting "too happy" to notice details. So...he told me these "spiked panties" were also to remind me how my poor bottom would feel if I did not control myself that evening. 

      I did not drink a drop. My bottom did have some nasty markings from those devilish little spiked discs...but they are pretty much cleared up this morning.

      So...yes...his spanking and discipline...is a huge "help" for me in staying sober. He never spanks me when we are in a hotel...but he is " creative"...lol...and this was a new thing he did to help me.

  8. Have you ever experienced this as a spankee, or done this as a spanker? I remember several occasions growing up in which my momma would smack my behind as she chased or marched me into the house or out to the barn while swatting my hind end with her hand every few steps. Then...it was bend over while she got "her paddle" to spank me. My husband has, now and then, also "marched" me to the room where my "real" spanking would take place...sometimes planting hard swats with his hand over my behind or thighs...and sometimes with his belt. It happened just last week...upon entering the front door. I "did" know a punishment was "coming", but not "when" or "where". I was greeted with him sitting in the living room with belt in hand. He promptly called me to attention, harnessed my arms folded behind my back....and marched me out the front door and around the house to the walk-in door leading to our basement, where my punishment took place. We are rural, so nobody saw this. The whole "walk" he would periodically swat my hind end and upper legs with his belt. Some of those swats did not really sting much because of my skirt, which was comfortably loose, but...it really captured my attention and I found myself kind of acting...and feeling...like I did when I experienced this as a child. Anybody here at all...that can relate to this type of spanking experience?
  9. Broken trust can only be earned back...over time. Trust...must be earned. So...yes...a willingness to confess or accept the guilt and consequences of breaking trust are important.. A sincere apology is also important....but the best way to mend the breach of trust is by far harder than those. That is, "showing" and "demonstrating" that you are indeed "trustworthy" in your attitude and actions within the relationship moving forward. The amount of time required to bring restoration of trust is then in the hands of the one you broke trust with... but if they truly value your relationship, they will see your sincere heart and effort....and repentance...and extend grace and trust once again to you. 🙂
  10. Ours is a pretty intense disciplinary dynamic. I have shared why that is....here many times. While many of my spankings and punishments are more in line with the "norm" for many here...."sometimes" my husband "does" give me very harsh punishments. There have been years I manage to avoid those more "harsh" punishments...but this year was not one of them....lol. This last one wasvthe third this year....arrrg. As a writing assignment, and to help me express myself better and learn, I have shared a few of those experiences here in writing ...in times past. I actually enjoyed doing that...as it seemed therapeutic or "something" to me...I do not know how to describe it...but for me writing about and sharing it here... or any spanking I get really...is strangely...a good thing for me. The things I share are real and true...totally consensual...but...punitive for sure....and....for probably most people here...just plain too harsh. So... I did receive here and there some very harsh criticism of "us" and "some" claims of me just telling lies and making it all up. I have not lied, but of course that is up to the opinion of others believe me or not....but please believe me when I say we have a mutually happy marriage....not "perfect" I am sure...but we deeply love and continue to grow in our love of each other and our children, family, and friends. I am not abused nor is my husband abusive. He is strong as my dominant husband and I am submissive as his servant wife...and it works well for us....We know our more intense dynamic is not for everybody, and do not.expect that. But... we fully recognize one another's needs and fulfill them in our marriage together ...but yes...we have found....sometimes the more harsh punishments I get...are just too much for some here. So...husband and me have decided to not share those in detail as a writing assignment for me. We do not condemn anybody for their opinion or "negative feelings" about our intensity....but my husband has decided it best to not upset people with my writing on those experiences...at least for awhile. And...I admit that I struggle with learning to handle negative or what I perceive as judgmental comments about me. I get upset and hurt...and at least until I get more emotionally mature...it is best I not expose myself to such in how detailed I share the more harsh interactions we have. Suffice it to say....it was a no nonsense, pure disciplinary punishment....and I agreed it was appropriate. He used his custom made rubber whip, his belt, punitive exercise, anditcall ended with me well spanked over his lap with his hand. He withheld after care and holding me in his arms until the next morning. That was perhaps the worst of it for me...knowing he was so displeased with me and "feeling" for awhile like he would never hug me and let me cry it out in his arms. He was truly angry with me...not out of control...but his anger strongly expressed in how he handled me during the punishment...really more than just a spanking. Out of necessity, very emotionally draining and physically taxing...but necessary...and fulfilling in our dynamic. I was "tender" for awhile and bore some streaks of redness and weals for a couple days or so...but no marks at all now.
  11. I have posted in this thread how my husband's parents and two of his married sisters have been, for years, in what I guess is best described as a "domestic" discipline marriage...my in-laws are both in their early 60s I think and have been together I think about 40 years. So... it is not some kind of weird sexual thing in our family...and except for a couple incidents in the beginning of our marriage when my mother in law and me were spanked over clothing in front of each other's husband for being "cohorts" in a transgression...lol...we do not "share" sessions. But...my mother in law and me have developed an amazing bond and friendship the last 15 years...and we do share a lot with each other. It is good for both of us. Last week I got a pretty hard spanking for making some foolish decisions that put me in a dangerous situation. Last evening as were visiting the in laws and my mother in law were doing dishes, she shared how her husband gave her a good belt whippin' and hand spanking from her husband the day before...because she did not try hard enough...or think to even question...my decision to walk in a dangerous neighborhood to get us some coffee. I appreciate my father in law loves me, but I feel kind of bad my behavior also got my mother in law in trouble. But... she told me she deserved it....she just wasn't thinking and should have insisted on someone going with me. So...I guess...once again...we both had some lesson to learn together.
  12. @Chawsee....Thank you for your comments. I trained in Tang Soo Do....but I have not been formally active as much as I should the last few years. My husband is my sa bum and another friend is also my sensei....I do incorporate punches and kicks into my workouts about once a week...and regularly do flexibility training...spar now and then to stay sharp, but probably should do more. It is just there is not enough time with all the other things happening in our lives...lol. My husband does offer 2 week "sessions" at the fitness center 3 or 4 times a year on "self defense"....and I help him. We incorporate some Tang Soo Doo techniques into those. Tang So Doo is kind of like Tae Kwan Do...with an emphasis in striking. I understand your feelings about the perpetrator. Trust me...I do...lol. I dunno, I guess I just cannot believe how foolish he was and the decision to be like this....yet...I also do understand. But for the grace of God...and the belt of my husband...lol....there I go too 🙂.
  13. I certainly do apologize during a spanking...it just comes as the "regret" and realization of why I am being spanked sinks in.
  14. @Spanknutt....Thanks for the concern. I have discussed this with my husband as a result of your post. He is always nearby when he puts me in restraints...but...and never leaves me "unattended"...but....I get your point that...lets say he has a heart attack or aneurism or something...then I would be in big trouble. He is looking into some options. He is very healthy and fit, but...yes...the unexpected "can" happen. lol...just joking and not diminishing your legitimate point...but maybe a meteor hits him....lol. Lol...would just be my luck...lol.
  15. I dunno....it sounds very harsh to me...at least the side with ridges. I looked "serpentine belt" up on google.....maybe the smooth side would be bearable...but really not sure about the toothed side. Hoping my husband gets no "ideas" from your post...lol....at least not in the near future.
  16. Spent the night sleeping on my stomach, snuggled up beside my husband's strong naked body. My pillow was moist from my tears...even this morning as I awakened. I shed many. I found myself releasing many strange sounds of pain and regret and sorrow, echoing off the walls...in shrieks and pleas and groans and screeches. I have not been so "released" from within....in a very long time. My tears freely flowed, my sobs freely came in wave upon wave uncontrollably. No sex...just punishment. I was "undone"...a total mess of blubbering repentance as my body and spirit embraced his loving strong anger and frustration with me. My voice is still "raspy" this morning...but...my sleep was amazingly deep...peaceful...even as my body bore the marks of his discipline...marks which I will bear for a few days. I am sore...my skin tender in places, my bottom and thighs still evoking awareness of the punishment born. But, this morning...finally, finally...after withholding his comfort and embrace....my body and spirit only knowing his justifiable anger and harshness in dealing with me...finally....I awoke to his warm embrace, holding me close...soothing me and assuring me in his arms...my face breathing in his chest...."all is forgiven"....and knowing I will do better now. Release...from guilt and the regret of my dangerous, careless, thoughtless poor decision that put me in very unnecessary peril. Finally....this morning....kneeling before him to give him pleasure and thanks.... allowed to do so. Life goes on. Life "can" go on now. As I did the barn chores, the soreness of my body reminded me of his belt and whip, and of the desperate strenuous struggle required in last evening's punitive exercise....but I well know the soreness of physical strain will make me yet stronger, just as any good workout, and the lingering tenderness and marks of his chastisement shall remind me of his deep, special love for me. These will diminish, but my lesson learned will bring continued safety in my decisions moving forward. He has me in an ankle length dress today with snug corset and garters and hose...panties...all in black...and gym shoes...lol. Not my preference, as my skin would like smooth silky under things today..but pleasing to him and as he requires...which gives me pleasure as well. I will have a busy day of giving massage and PT sessions, but will quietly go about my day....mindful of his strong disciplinary and caring love for me....by the marks and tender weals concealed from other eyes beneath my dress, but well known to me. And...this evening....we drive to the airport to welcome our sweet daughter home from a 3 month student experience in New Guinea. So...this is a good day. How do you feel, after receiving...or giving...what would be a "more" severe spanking? For those not into "disciplinary" spankings, how do you "feel" after a more "intense" spanking experience...compared to your more "normal" or "routine" experience?
  17. Sitting...tenderly....at the coffee shop as I take a few minutes to interact here before a long day of massage and PT clients...sipping on my coffee with almond milk and stevia caramel flavoring....and....a this amazing cinnamon roll.....
  18. lol...yeah...horse poop...I shovel that stuff up several times a week. It is worse when horses get diarhea....but...guess that is TMI...lol.
  19. I am careful not to brag...it was just a necessary action of self defense. He was very thin and frail...not very strong looking...at least to me. I have been there regarding drug addiction and know how desperate it can make you..to do foolish dangerous things. But...he had a knife. I am pretty sure he will probably wind up doing some prison time. Once again, I wish our criminal justice and rehab system were enabled to apply corporal punishment and in-life treatment intercession and monitoring in life with authority to sustain adherence with corporal discipline. The default is always...lock him up and let him learn ling term despair and bitterness....instead of being made and monitored and helped in actually living a better life. I speak from experience...lol.
  20. lol...unfortunately we do not serve those in their "real" form you are thinking/wishing....lol...but mine are pretty good, or so I am told...lol. We serve various breakfast and lunch type sandwiches, and we order some pastries from a bakery regularly that makes everything gluten free, but still very tasty. We also get some low carb (pretty much keto) pastries and baked goods...including cookies. Our clients are very health and diet aware....a niche for our business. BUT...we DO have this sweet little lady in town, not far from us...who makes us the very best cinnamon rolls I have ever tasted...and they are not gluten free or low sugar...but they ARE delicious....and great with coffee. She makes us 4 dozen three days a week....and they get completely sold out...very popular. Today they are not a available...but tomorrow...I am really looking forward to getting me one! And...they are big too!
  21. Nothing to do with spanking...lol...but it does involve kicking someone's butt...lol. Yesterday I was making a coffee run for two friends while doing a free massage clinic in a soup kitchen in a large city a couple hours from our rural home. A man come out from behind a dumpster and demanded my purse and "everything I had on me." Well, he had a small knife and was very nervous, and actually smaller than me. I threw my purse a couple feet away and pretended to take off my wedding ring, and then my martial arts training kicked in. As he bent I kicked his face, then grabbed his arm and swung it around and behind him, causing him to drop the knife and I heard his shoulder crack as I jerked it high and hard up and behind him. I then kicked him in his man parts and gave him two hand heel punches...one got his eye, the other his nose...which I found out later I broke. Fortunately, a couple not too far away saw the whole thing and ran to my rescue, but he was actually writhing on the ground and not going anywhere. The couple had called 911, and the police were there in no time. My hand is a bit sore, but physically I am ok. It was a huge traumatic emotional thing for me, however....and "after" it was over, I broke down in my mother in law's arms. But, today I am better. It was the first time I got truly violent since my arrest that sent me to prison, and I had not felt that rage rise up since prison....so it scared me to realize it is still in me. I could have really hurt this guy, but my husband's martial art training always emphasized self defense...which came to my mind as I was ready to go in to really hurt him...but realized he had. been neutralized and he was no longer a threat. I was worried the police would see my past record and arrest me again...but the witnesses saw everything and explained it...plus...a nearby security camera caught the whole thing to collaborate my story. What a relief! So...guess I just felt the need to share this...with my friends here. My husband started training me in his Korean form of karate early on in our marriage and I made a black belt level...but since then I just practice now and then...occasionally assist him in training a group now and then, and do some occasional sparring. I am so thankful my husband taught me these skills...and feel like the effort paid off yesterday big time. My husband was proud of me, but also not happy that I put myself in danger foolishly. I was by myself in a bad neighborhood, whereas I could have asked for someone to accompany me. I also did not take my cell phone with me. So...yes...my husband said he would give me some time to settle down from the experience...but I could expect a good hide tanning for my poor and dangerous decisions. Inam not looking forward to it, but I totally I agree I need and deserve whatever I am gonna get from him. I guess I want to encourage you all to be careful and avoid being alone on streets, especially in bad areas....and consider taking some self defense training. It may one day save your life! Turns out the man was 20 years old and a drug addict. I hope this will actually be the beginning of a turn around for the better in this young man's life.
  22. My favorite....absolutely the smell of my husband's bare chest...but...lol for general consumers....the smell of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies and the smell of fresh coffee in the morning...they are tied for first. My least favorite....moldy musky odor and horse poop...those are also tied for least favorite...lol.
  23. @Chawsee... I dunno, perhaps the red one I mentioned "might" be considered a bit "BDSM"..I dunno. It is very plain and has a subtle clasp to bring it together, narrow in width...and I wear it pretty much in coordination with the top I am wearing. I think it "has" drawn some comments like I mentioned 2 or 3 times. But....comments or "looks" from other women about my chokers is not a "common" occurrence for me, but when it does happen I am a bit surprised. I have responded along the lines that... it is just a style of necklace I enjoy wearing, and nothing else. That has ended the brief conversations that have arose about that...at least thus far. In our dynamic, I wear whatever my husband sets out or tells me to wear...but I do have the privilege of calling into question and requesting a reconsideration if his choice is just plain outside of color coordination or a mismatch of styles or...or...maybe not good for the current weather. lol...like a shorter light fabric skirt on a really cold winter day. Lol...in the beginning with us I had to request such "reconsiderations" more often, but now...rarely...lol. He has developed a good sense of style and color coordination, in my opinion, and he obviously likes choker necklaces on me...lol...seems like I am wearing them 3 or 4 days a week at least....lol.
  24. @Powpaulie...lol...We have seats that are cushioned...and there have been a number of Sunday mornings over the years tjat I have been very thankful for that!....lol
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