rubyredd

Saw this today at TJ Maxx... it is a sheet mask for your booty.

I would really recommend working up to the wooden spoon. I tend to play quite hard when it comes to regular spanking. Nothing about hitting the vulva-to-anus region should be done very hard - so there is really no comparison between this type of "spanking" and spanking on the bottom. The lovely thing about light / stinging implements is that they increase bloodflow to the area which makes it even more intense and satisfying.

To be honest... many are looking for partners a bit closer to their age. Not all, of course. You are looking at a 40 year age gap and that won't be every younger female spankee's cup o' tea. There are spankees of all ages here - and some are in that age range - but you might have more luck with a kinkster match site that is easier to search. Best of luck!

Crop, flogger, light leather strap, light wooden spoon... all are fine. I don't really find it more painful than regular spanking, so if merely inflicting pain is the goal, you might want to look for a less rough-and-ready body part. Not sure how well-versed you are regarding the female anatomy, but the vulva (to include mons & labia) can really take a lickin' and keep on tickin'. Heavier implements - especially rigid wood - are not a wise choice unless your goal is to fracture something. The bones down there are great at expanding for childbirth, but not so good for hitting. Stinging swats to the vulva and anus can definitely intensify our pleasure, though. Just pick a suitable implement and listen to your partner.

I knowwwww. I was teasing. 😉

I hope no one thinks this story is about me. 😬😆

Like @Bramblewine- I like playful and deliberate brattiness. It is part of the funishment game for me. I label myself as a bottom / brat. I am not a brat to every Top because some folks don't enjoy that dynamic - and bratting requires consent. I rarely brat my husband because that isn't really our dynamic. We both enjoy those bratty moments, but it isn't the norm. Asking questions isn't bratting. Sharing your thoughts and interests isn't bratting. Being authentically disrespectful is not bratting. If you are chatting with another spanko and they are not into bratting, then it is up to you to not be a brat. But, a Top who sees every question you ask or thought you share as being bratty and willful - well, they are probably a Domhole who is either insecure or a control freak (and not in a fun D/s way). There are Tops out there who like the "brat" label and use it as an excuse to spank. Which is totally fine as long as you also enjoy that type of banter or play. If not, youu could just tell them that you aren't into bratting and are just trying to have an open conversation. If they continue with brat-baiting (or bratting-from-the-Top), it is time to remove yourself. The key to being a brat is to have fun and still be respectful of/to your partner.

Sometimes the waiting is the best part. Anticipation is just thrilling.

Your husband is distressed and grumpy? I know this is not a popular opinion, but this is why I think it is important for folks in spanko-vanilla relationships to just accept the other person as they are. Yes, sometimes it works out. Some couples strike a balance. But, other times it is a wholly unnatural fit. I know and I can empathize, because I have been there. But, when did "no" stop being a complete answer? Why force your partner to do something that entailed a "lengthy standoff followed by a tense discussion"? That doesn't seem like a way to respect boundaries or your partner's decisions. And for him to still be distressed just makes me sad that anyone has to feel pressured - whether spanko or vanilla.

Absolutely agree. I would take that as a sign the person did not value discretion in the same way that I do - and would consider it a warning about approaching them as a potential partner.

Well now... here is a question I will never be qualified to answer. 😂🍑

My only concern relates to the particular profile pic you have chosen to use here. Maybe the other people are fellow spankos and all are completely fine with their faces used as part of your profile picture. But, a pic of just you would probably be a better choice. Or at least blur out the others. Plenty of folks on SN have face pics, though it is not something I would really recommend for other women, and that is fine - but I haven't seen any that include other people (kinkster or otherwise). Most pics with more than one person are professional shots / stills from spanking videos. I have been rubyredd online since 1999 or so - and she is me and I am her. But, I have a family and a job and my profile picture will always be the backside of me. My husband is a spanko Top, so it wouldn't bother him, but it could hurt our family unit as a whole to be outted. And I won't risk harming the people I love for some perceived sense of freedom that has no real positive impact on my life. The online spanking community has long been the only support I need. I don't need to be out to the vanilla community. There were times in my life - my 20s - when most of my friends knew. But I don't talk about spanking to vanillas anymore. I have my husband, real-life spanko friends, former partners, and the fine folks of SN. No matter what, we should all do what makes us happy and comfortable.

I haven't been in a disciplinary relationship for a while, but I can't remember any set rewards. Not to sound trite, but I am not really interested in the reward end of the spectrum. Discipline is its own reward, so to speak. And not getting punished is a reward. I wouldn't want a reward that conflicts with one or more of my goals - like ice cream for a treat if my goal is to eat less sugar. Maybe a spa day? I can't even think of possible rewards and the idea hasn't really ever crossed my mind. How odd. 😆