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Blog Comments posted by Am123

  1. On 10/28/2022 at 2:15 PM, Denny45 said:

    I've commented on punishment spankings in other threads. I really don't believe a spanking is appropriate punishment for a spanko. How much spanking is enough to punish a spanko? If you let the spankee decide by using a safeword, it's unclear if the spanking has been severe enough to deter the misbehavior. If you let the spanker decide the spanking may be too little or too much. If the object is to motivate the spankee to stop a certain behavior, I believe the punishment should be something other than a spanking. What it should be is dependent on the miscreant. Something that they like should be denied. Maybe taking away their phone, restricting them from buying things, house arrest, etc. Any of these should be a deterrent without the problems with a spanking. i know ever one that reads this is a spanko but punishment can be part of spanko's life outside spanking

    I think you're missing the point. 

    You're assuming that an EE is someone who isn't capable of making good choices and decisions without the aid of punishments. They don't want the punishment to correct their behaviour, it's about accountability and guilt release. And because we're into it.

    I know it's really common for bottoms to think they need spankings to help them make the right decisions, but I feel (controversially perhaps, but just my opinion) that this is just an unhealthy repression of a spanking and discipline fetish.

  2. On 2/24/2021 at 8:10 PM, maelstr0m said:

    I stick to 'vanilla' dating sites.  Have never met a "pro" on one of those.  Specialty sites are interesting and fun, but I very much doubt there is a match on here, or Fetlife, etc.   Too few females and way too many males.

    I sort of agree with this approach. Are you open about your kink in your profile? 

    The problem I've found with doing this, is that on vanilla sites, there simply aren't that many spankos. 

    I think my approach going forward would be to try to attend local and national munches and connect with people there.

  3. 6 hours ago, Stephen_C said:

    I am not absolutely sure that it was witnessed.  I once got a spanking at about 1 or 2 a.m. on a beach on the west coast of Vancouver Island.  My spanking was done by a girlfriend I had at the time.  She sat on this large piece of driftwood and pulled down my pants and underwear and took me over her knee.  For several minutes the waves of the Pacific Ocean lapped on the shore and the sounds of her hand spanking my bare bum were the only sounds.  When it was done and I was allowed to pull my pants back up, we walked down the moonlit pathway to where the car was parked.  Not too far down that path we met another couple coming towards the beach.  The looks they gave me were what made me wonder if they'd seen what was going on.  I'd like to think that they did but I'm just not sure.


    Oh man, I bet you were mortified haha. 

  4. On 11/8/2020 at 8:38 PM, MrRitter said:

    As for the first response, some people just cannot resist typing "one-handed," and it drives me bonkers, haha

    I know right ??

    On 11/8/2020 at 8:38 PM, MrRitter said:

    This has been brought up a lot lately.  I am giving two punishments (or two parts of a punishment, if you will) later this week.  The first being a paddling, then later an otk session with the hairbrush.  Me and my ee have discussed at length about how she is genuinely scared.  She is, after all, getting genuine punishment. She is also excited for it, too, at least on a subconcious level.

    I am dead serious about said punishment.  However, I would be lying if I said i was not also excited to give it.  I think for a disciplinarian-oriented top such as myself, meting out an actual punishment, not a role play, not a "funishment," is sort of the pinnacle of doing what I love to do.  It doesn't mean that it's taken lightly, or that my role is met with any less seriousness as it should.  No matter what, though- I love to spank women, and the more "real" it is, especially with someone I am as close to as this gal, the better.

    Really relate to this. Its not something that we feel we should enjoy, but at the same time there's an excitement about it. 

    It is, despite the pain and embarrassment, usually a very positive experience. As much a release of guilt and stress for (hopefully) both parties. I think playing our part in this experience may be one of the things that gives us that excitement and enjoyment. 

    • Like 1
  5. On 10/18/2020 at 12:48 AM, StrictM67 said:

    I spank my girl friend when she has been disrespectful I always make sure she is humiliated and as embarressed as possible At 36 she over my knee with her panties down and streached between her knees . She has no choice but to display her pussy and asshole both of which I finger as she begs me to stop.

    Okaaay. A little too much information there ??

  6. 29 minutes ago, leighaddyTiH said:

    So what determines whether you're EE or ER, is it your mood at the time or who you're with and their role? 

    Good question. I'd say it's a combination of both. I can switch depending on mood, but if I were having a session with a pure ER or EE I could probably adapt accordingly. Though there was one time I was spanked while in an ER headspace, that didn't go well. 

    30 minutes ago, leighaddyTiH said:

    What happens if you end up with someone who is only EE or ER? 

    In the longterm, I'd have to go with someone who was only EE or switch. I don't think I could be in a relationship where I was 100% EE. Definitely prefer the ER side.

    30 minutes ago, leighaddyTiH said:

    Having started out as an EE that must give you incredible insight into everything the EE is feeling when you're then the one on top - and Visa versa. 

    Thanks :). Being spanked definitely helps me from the ER side in terms of reading how my spankee is feeling. 

  7. 14 hours ago, Noah47 said:

    Just a question. Should a spanking make the spankee cry

    Really good point here, and one I maybe should have covered.

    @leighaddyTiH pretty much nails it though. Tears are something that do not come from pain, but from the emotional headspace of the spankee and the emotions they're feeling. For a punishment spanking, this could be a combination of shame, guilt and vulnerability. 

    So, in answer to your question, I'd say crying not a necessity for a spanking, but its certainly a freeing and cathartic experience and can definitely enhance any session for me.

  8. 46 minutes ago, leighaddyTiH said:

    I do have to say though, I have spoken to several people and read comments where some feel that the spanking precedes forgiveness and is needed in order to gain it...and may be another reason why some want spankings or spank. I do feel the need to say that this understanding of forgiveness is a little polluted though as forgiveness is that anger, burning, resentment feeling in the pit of your stomach (when you think of them and just want to slap that face), this cannot be let go through revenge or discipline - thats like taking poison and expecting the other person to die. Forgiveness is a conscious decision we make on our own to let go of that anger - the only person it affects is us, so why hang onto it? The spanking is for discipline and should never be anything to do with forgiveness. 

    100% agree with this. A punishment spanking, no matter what the offence, should never be done in anger or to seek revenge of any kind. Spanking should always come from a place of care and trust. They should be about lifting the spankee up and forgiving them as much as a deterrent for misbehaviour.

    • Like 1
    • Thanks 1
  9. Some nice comments here, thanks everyone :).

    Does seem like I've been a bit harsh on early bedtimes from the looks of some of the comments, It definitely could be effective depending on the EE. 

    Meant to include mouth soaping and grounding but slipped my mind at the time. 

    I'm 50/50 on mouth soaping, it was definitely a deterrent being threatened by it as a kid and would definitely be effective for bad language. But at the same time, having worked with a lot of soapy products and seen what goes into them, does make me a bit wary of putting it in someone's mouth. But scoring only based on effectiveness 7/10.

    Grounding can also be effective, but for me, would probably do it only for a day when combined with a good spanking. Not to say it wouldn't be a good punishment to not go out for a week, I just personally prefer to have a punishment carried out in a relatively short space of time rather than dragging it out for q few weeks. Would probably go with a 7/10.

    • Like 1
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