paparondoc

Naomi, please read all these posts closely. There's a lot of personal experiences being brought out for you to ponder. Hopefully you will learn what happens when a relationship has secrets. Sooner or later what your doing will be found out. It'll eat you up inside eventually, untill you face the truth. You are young and getting involved in a possible life long family type relationship. Your non sexual spanking relationship (I might guess it's with a much older male) is one not easy to find, nor is a serious sexual relationship. I certainly can't get into your head as people are different in so many ways. But in my long life experience, there becomes a time when exclusivity sometimes rears its head, and jelously gets in the way, whether your a male or a female. Ideally, you should be, at your age, seeking a lover who also loves to spank. Be comfortable enough with yourself to express your feelings early on. I promise, you will feel better in the long run. Face it, the reason you brought it up in this forum is you already have doubts.

This is just a general discussion about something I have encounterd from other sites. I will not mention names to not advertise them. Before I found this site, I had ventured into some sites that required payment of a credit card. You would see pictures and written info of females who claim they wanted to be spanked, also you could put in distance from where you were domiciled, what you had to offer, etc. I never had luck, nor when I put out inquires, didn't get answers, or seldom, and then no further messaging. Has anyone experienced this? Reason I'm asking is that info gleaned from any answers and others experience may help someone else on this site not have to cancel credit cards, or battle possible fraud by not starting into a spank for pay site.

After reading and absorbing, I think, all that has been posted on this subject to date , I have come up with one conclusion. Before I continue, I must say this is from my own life experiences, which though limited, I have survived and reached a ripe old age that I never thought I would. Thus I have the ability to look back and reflect. In this , my conclusion,at least in my mind perhaps, the ideal relationship we all as humans seek, is one in which we can be completely at ease with the other sex, or parther, and have no secrets from that person. Maybe I am talking about idealism, and not reality. But I digress. If I had to do it over, being hoplessly engrosed in the spanking kink, for whatever reason, from a young age, I would seek out someone who was like myself in that thinking. Plus, of course, I would want this person to be also interested in sex, raising a family, and also having all the atributes I had in my mind in lookig for a life partner. Growing up I had nobody but well meaning friends who taught me about sex (how to satisy myself, not a parther)...and no one to teach me about the importance of communication. I lost my mother at an early age, and had a workaholic father who really wasnt around much. I , of course, never new I could ask questions, nor realized in my protective environment there were questions to be asked. With the advent of the internet, I have discovered sites unimaginable to me as I grew up thinking I was weird and had to stay silent, and in the "closet". I would have loved to have someone point out to me that the reason there were so many movies and magazines that included or were specifically geared to spanking themes as I grew up n the 50's and 60's, that there was a vast audience out there besides myself who enjoyed reading and buying these products. As they say, youth is wasted on youth, and we get smarter as we get older. I note the ages of so many people who have found this spanking forum who have a long future to look forward to. So to cut to the chase, believe in yourself, dont settle for less, and learn how to ask questions and be open to rejection upon rejection until that Mr or Mrs right falls into your life...he/she is out there. If spanking is important, go to one of those advertised conventions in Texas or Las Vegas, etc. If you like I'm open to questions ,suggestions...message me, take advantage of the experience of others on this site if you are young. I've been in many long vanilla relationships including now, in which I have chosen to keep secret my ability to meet ee's in my vacinity. Its not perfect for my psyche, but it fills a void. However, all things being equal, it would be nice to have everythingin one package everything in one "package". "Cest levie"..(not sure if I got that right...lol)

Before I start, I must say that I am astounded by the caliper of people who are on this site. The advice and insight of those responding to others travails reveal to me that "you" are people that truly care about others, and that many of "you" have experienced similar problems in your own lives, and are really trying to help another human being who is going through what they themselves have experienced. If life was only that simple, if people were only that simple! In the case of "F/m-Spanking-only", your advice and insight has resulted apparently into a lot of introspection on his part. I may be wrong, but it appears to me that he is somewhat more possessive in his desire to have a one on one relationship with his ER, probably due to previous incidents to which he eludes, and having evidently built some high walls around him which will be hard to break through. The "mistake" that his ER made, might or might not be fatal. That mistake was being evasive when the fact of this trip was revealed and not settled factually in a timely fashioned. Having been burnt, it set up a red flag. Having been through many relationships myself, and having built high walls myself, I can speak from experience. Before giving up this relationship, If it was me, since I truly would "like this to work", but have lost some trust, before I went onto a next step I would be testing this individual and judgeing reactions. I'm putting myself in his shoes, not hers. Her being an individual can certainly leave anytime, but if shes stays and tolerates this"abuse" by him, can make the walls crumble. That's a big if. In this case, again, by acting/being possive ,this might be the killer, as usually the Dom is the ER while the EE is usually subjective, not visa versa. As "F/m", put it in his last sentence, he's lucky to have found a female er, and maybe not rocking the boat would be the best course to take...and just keep looking for that elusive "perfect" person he/we all desperatly seek.

The story on my computer is in black...this has happened before. How do I get to prove I'm over 18. (Alteady have 5 of my 7 grandchildren over 18!)

Even though there hasn't been a post since June, must confess I'm like the others, completely possessed by the thought of spanking 24 plus hours a day.. Now it's worse because I'm retired and there's the internet with all the thousands of sites about spanking! Before I was buying magazines and movies, then videos, dvd's.... Now the computer has completely corrupted my life from when i get up, till when I go to bed.....I wonder if a shrink would help..but I'm happy, so who cares...

As a third party looking over your shoulder, after reading your letter about how important trust has to be in a relationship, I can honestly say your not just looking for an occassional spanking from this female, but would like more of a one on one relationship. If you can't get an honest answer from her, and from my life experience a lie is always found out, then you must stop killing yourself with these doubts and move on. Go find yourself someone who you can trust to be honest with you, but also has the same mindset with spanking that you do. You can certainly stay with this woman if your happy with her spanking service, but leave it at that and don't fool yourself or expect that you're the only one, if you must have her undevided attention. Sounds like you can't have your cake and eat it in this case.... If she's single and so are you, unfortunately in this scene, she has the upper hand, and is maybe wanting you to make the plunge...something you have to really think about. Is she worth letting go or is she worth keeping. You already know how she spanks, so that answers one part....would you be happy being spanked by her plus whatever else her image fits your mind?

Don't insult us older spankers....just kidding...personally when I answer a request from a ee, I tell them this grandpa can still pack a wallop, or do whatever fantasy they would like. No LTR, nor sex included....just satisfaction of a" red hot butt"

I was on some site the other day when I raised this same question. I'm in west central Florida, and I joined in a few clubs in Florida since I'm not into traveling. I saw notes from M/F"s in the group saying they needed/wanted a spanking. Being completely involved with the kink for as long as I can remember and being active for many years, I usually answered back that I 'd be happy to fulfill their request, no frills such as LTR or sex, etc, involved. Just what they wanted and how they wanted it... I always tell them at least I'd be happy to just say hello or discuss. Most of the time I never get an answer, or even acknowledgement to say "they changed their mind ...or you're to old (lol)...or a whatever.... (I take it back...there was one that followed through that worked out fine .....only one))

Not sure if this is the place to bring it up, but I've answered inquires from women who say they liked and needed to be spanked. I find out they're fairly close to me in west central Florida, and offer my services as a person who is an experienced spanker who I presume could give them what they want in any shape, type or form...and then i get silence. Not sure why they posted their need in the first place...any one have ideas?

As a closet spanker with only vanilla relationships all my life, if I had life to do over, I would be more open with my kink...I can only say to those who are young, if it a real driving force, be honest and open up, somewhere, somehow, you will find your significant other...the world is a big place, be open, honest with yourself.Im sure you will find the one to spend your life with. Take it from one who realized it to late....my only hope us to be born again and remember this life...somehow...lol

Nothing wrong with that...one doesn't have spank hard to get satisfied...rubbing, just feeling the subjugation of her trust...lucky man

I see you have an address in Vegas...now that the pandemic is over, I tink there are some weekend theemed spanking parties....if you can find them. Maybe a local Las Vegas er will show up...I'm just guessing...Is there a way of advertising on this site...guess one never knows who's out there, but maybe there's one...all you need is one....Good luck.

where is this meeting hall section located...its supposed to be a place to meet people but where is it,

As long as this subject has come up, lets face it. We're more aroused by our fetish than we are from normal vanilla sex....of course we're going to get hard from a spanking or its anticipation, and I don't remember any female that was as kinky as I , not being wet from a good spanking. In fact, I'm sure some of you guys who are having problems comming after one or two prior climaxes durring a non spanking "session", might look at your partners butt and think how nice it would be to spank it, and be able to climax immediately.....lol