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StevenSampson last won the day on October 17

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  1. Thanks @Megthe! That sounds like a really painful cropping you received. The signs you gave also are really good and indicators that I hadn’t thought of. Yeah if I’m unable to move or am hyperventilating or can’t speak then it means it’s time to stop or at least slow down because the body seems to be giving way. That’s different from the butt being in pain which is what a hard spanking is supposed to be. Can I ask if you’ve ever been brought to tears by a role playing spanking or one that wasn’t to correct your misdeeds? Many thanks!
  2. Thank you, @Megthe. That makes a lot of sense. Has your husband ever given you a severe spanking that did not cause you to cry? If so, at what point did it stop if tears weren’t going to be coming? Asking because although I hope I cry from this one I don’t know. Am trying to think of a “cut off point” for a severe spanking if I won’t end up crying which doesn’t involve me saying “red” lol- though of course if I have to I will.
  3. @VanillaProblems I can’t really give you advice on this, but can tell you that until a few nights ago I was in a somewhat similar situation. When my wife and I married a few good years ago and I brought up spanking soon after that, she was horrified and saddened and said “no way”. I too wouldn’t let it destroy my marriage and though at times I won’t lie I had thought about seeing someone else it would be cheating for me and also go against my religious faith (ie letting someone other than her see my privates), I knew I would never take that route. I also wouldn’t of course leave her for what is a very strong fetish that I’ve had since I was a kid. At times I fought it successfully at other times I couldn’t stop thinking about it. After some months of postings and discussions on this forum, I sat down with her and told her again this is my need and it’s frustrating I can’t meet it. She was extremely understanding and supportive and hopefully will be giving me a very hard spanking next week. That your wife said no back then doesn’t guarantee she will say no, now. Try to explain to her how much it means to you. Ask her if there are things you could do better to meet her needs. I have absolutely no idea how this discussion would go or even if I’m giving good advice but for what it’s worth you never know, people change over time.
  4. Feel free to share what you and your spanker do, and what goes on through your head, just before the first swat hits your bottom.
  5. I was terrified of telling my wife I want this, and when I brought it up last week (after 8 years of her initially saying no) she not only answered affirmatively, but also positively and even enthusiastically. Even when I elaborated and told her I hope she spanks me hard enough that I cry, she seemed a bit surprised but still said she will and agreed. I’m not saying that asking ones wife (or husband) for a spanking isn’t weird, but sometimes people can be more understanding than we give them credit for. And I guess if this “weirdness” doesn’t harm anyone, then there is nothing wrong with it.
  6. Thank you that makes sense. She will probably hold me and we’ll cuddle and talk about it. I was wondering if there would be some lotion I should put on by butt or would it heal naturally?
  7. Thank you @Megthe (and @gravano and @Rand E). Maybe I will ask her to just spank me with the spoon until my butt is red instead of tears, and then after corner time lay on the strap hard and if tears come they come. And yeah I’ll ask her to remain in character and hope she doesn’t go easy on me but will of course not be mad at her if she can’t go any more. @Megthe can I ask you what you mean when you write until you are “physically and emotionally spent”? What would that look like? You mentioned communication before, during and after the spanking. Before and after I understand, what do you mean during? You wrote how your husband makes you answer questions so you don’t go zone out, is that what you mean? I mean if I’m gettigt a hard spanking other than “ow” and “that really hurts” lol what else would I be saying (assuming not “red” or “yellow”)? Thanks!
  8. After getting a very hard spanking, do people do anything for their butt? Or maybe the spanked does as aftercare?
  9. Thank you, @gravano for sharing this. I think we have different mindsets and (at least so far) very different experiences. As a kid I think I wanted spankings because what I think wouldn’t be unsafe to describe as emotional abuse and control that was happening when I was growing up- directed more at my mom than me but I tasted it also- felt like far worse. I don’t think personally that kids should be spanked - at least not how I want to be spanked lol- a hand swat on the clothed butt for a toddler who is intentionally throwing toys or hit his sister I don’t know- I’m sure there are convincing arguments for and against- but this isn’t an allowed topic here and I don’t have a view on the issue either way. Regarding adult spankings for discipline, I think as long as it’s consensual I don’t see a problem. It’s not the reason I want a spanking and avoiding a spanking isn’t my motivation in working to put an end to bad habits or improve something in my life, rather my faith and fear of God is, but if a spanking is what it takes for some people then who am I to judge. My religion doesn’t condemn it so I don’t have a view on that issue either lol. Thank you again so much for your time and your input. It’s much appreciated.
  10. My wife and I don’t have kids, but if we did just as we would never ever allow them to see us having sex we would never ever allow them to see us engage in spanking. Kids shouldn’t be exposed to adult or for that other in my personal view any sexual/paraphilic/being naked lol for lack of a better term activity, especially that of their parents.
  11. So are you saying she didn’t cry because she felt guilty about doing something but instead from the pain itself?
  12. @gravano I’ve also wanted to say I’m sorry to hear about the obvious damage you suffered from the spanking from your wife. Can I ask if you had a safe word? Did you ask her to spank you until you were crying? Why did you feel the resentment toward her? If these are really personal questions I completely understand and don’t feel pressured to answer but I value your advice to me and wouldn’t want to feel anger towards her. Quite the opposite if she got me to that point I would like to think I’d be extremely grateful to her. It’s never happened yet to me though and it has to you which is why what you wrote is very important.
  13. I do have a hard time crying and there’s some emotional family stuff from the past that I am not going into that has possibly created this need in me since I was a kid (or maybe I’ve just been wired that way as some people have according to Jillian Keenan), which is maybe one reason I would want to be spanked to tears. I am however prepared to realize it may not happen. I have heard that scolding can help with that and will ask her to do that before she starts and like @Megthe recommended occasionally during the spanking to make it harder for me to “zone out”.
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