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About boy_otk

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  1. First of all, I'm a novice spankee. But I sure have thought about what an "ideal" spanking session would like and it constitutes a lot of things that you've touched upon in your post. In my opinion, the physical impact caused by a spanking will be fading away by a few days. On the other hand, an emotional impact is more likely to stay with us for a longer duration of time. Especially, for someone like me, who might have low self opinion about myself from time to time, a harsh comment or two during a spanking session will likely leave a more devastating impact than a paddle or hairbrush.
  2. I haven't been spanked yet but a few maternal disciplinarians I've had the pleasure of talking with have addressed me as "Young man" quite a few times. It has a certain gravitas associated with the term since it makes me quite nervous to read it and puts me in my place. While it might be a rather common term, when it comes from someone whom I look up to and rely on for maternal discipline, I believe it can be quite powerful. I've also been called "kiddo" which I think is a very affectionate term. It makes me feel quite powerless and completely accountable for my actions to a maternal f
  3. Playful banter with a brat like persona can often bring lightness and joy to the dynamic in my opinion. But there's a time and place for everything. As a spankee ( and potential submissive), I would probably engage in "playful" bratting. It will be nothing serious as to "breaking a rule". It just might be a way of expressing myself in a jovial manner. It crosses the line when it becomes disrespectful or directly breaks a pre-agreed rule. For instance, if "NO swearing" was a rule, and if the playful bratting resulted in uttering of a swear word, I think that crosses the line. I don'
  4. For me, it depends on the person who holds that authority. I detest it when it comes from someone who tries to control all aspects of my life in the name of authority. I've always hated the authority of teachers at schools, professors at universities etc because they often used it in an unfair manner. I won't blindly comply with any rule taken in an one-sided manner without discussion. I don't care for those who say "You do as I say, because I am the one in charge". No, never. I may want to be a submissive but am not a doormat. I have to believe that the rule being placed is going
  5. https://bigthink.com/culture-religion/matriarchy-mosuo-health I just came across this article and I figured maybe the fellow FLR enthusiasts on this site would enjoy reading it.
  6. Absolutely not. Being a spankee has nothing to do with being a submissive. In my opinion, if someone is submissive, that's deeply inbuilt in their character trait and they will be submissive irrespective of the fact whether they are spanked or not spanked. And then, there are some people who achieve a submissive state through spanking. Being submissive opens to a whole new world that might often be unprecedented for someone who identifies as a spankee alone. And just because someone is submissive during a spanking, that doesn't make them an overall submissive person either. So , No I don't th
  7. That's an interesting point. I have realized that I don't like to be dominated either. I mean, if and when I am in a relationship, I will *willingly* give my submission to her because I think it's a part of who I am. But, that said, I don't want to be ordered around and being dominated 24/7. Like many say , "Submission is a choice." I'd like to be given the choice to choose when I submit to her. Also, as you may well know, I obviously have a *need* for spankings ( I believe so anyway, I haven't received one yet), and more importantly, it's need a to have a "maternal" guidance. So, the
  8. For those who don't know, "FLR" means "Female Led Relationship". I've recently been thinking about the acceptance of FLR as a general standard in our society. Now, I'm from India. My "society" could be a little different from yours. But at the root of all of our societies, there has been a strong rise in equality among genders and empowerment of women. Considering the given trend, let's say two couples decide to "out" their relationship dynamic. One couple, follow the traditional male - led DD, while the other couple follow a female-led DD. As you can see, this is purely an imaginative s
  9. I wholeheartedly agree with what's being said in that article. First off, I am not a Christian. But I cringe every time I come across DD associated with religion and godly belief. I mean, come on!!!! As the last paragraph of the article beautifully summarized, two adults can engage in any activity as long as it is consensual. But using faith in religion as a justification is outright silly. No one "must" have to submit to anyone. It's their choice. A wife can submit to her husband if she wants. A husband can submit to his wife if he wants. It doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is wh
  10. Yup. I knew that from reading your "About me" on the site you created. It made me smile. I love that site. I often re-read the articles because it's just perfectly in accordance with the kind of dynamic I dream of. As you know, I am half way across the world from you. But I'd love to chat with you about your views and ideas regarding the DWC and implementation of the said principles in reality. Let me know if that's okay with you!
  11. http://auntkaysdwc.com/ http://pamspanks.blogspot.com/?zx=297d94abd3a2a315 The above given links are my all time favorite blogs. They portray the kind of F/M relationship I dream of. Nothing over the top. No BDSM. Just pure loving domestic discipline.
  12. I agree. False praise actually results in further deteriorating my self-esteem. I believe anything unearned by hard work is not exactly beneficial psychologically. Just the other day a close family member was praising me for something and while I had a happy face about it on the outside, deep down, I knew I didn't deserve that. I knew that the praise is coming from a point of view where the other person doesn't know the entire story and the thoughts inside my head. It only results in negative impacts on my overall thought process and nothing positive is yielded as the result of such praises.
  13. I visit Spankingtube whenever I am craving to watch some spanking action. I am interested in videos which are realistic F/M consensual adult spankings which reflect a real life dynamic rather than a staged made up one. I am not into watching over the top and overtly brutal spankings. Simple realistic spankings where the spankee is treated with respect, love and consideration are my favorite. My big turn-ons in videos are the dynamic between the spanker and her spankee, the use of authentic verbal and spanking discipline. The things I find extremely distasteful in videos are when the spanker mo
  14. When I mess up, I am quite hard on myself. I don't think I need someone else coming down hard on me as well. Coming from that perspective, I don't want someone screaming at me or belittling me.I am someone who can have very low self opinion at times, so if my spanker starts to scold me harshly, my "walls" would get thicker and I'd never get the necessary release from the spanking. I would prefer a more supportive conversation highlighting my positives and thereby motivating me to live up to my potential.
  15. This is certainly not a "Yes" or "No" question. Some vanillas are more open to experimenting with different activities than others. It purely depends on what kind of individual one person is, how open they are, and to what extent are they willing to go in order to satisfy their partner's needs. It's never a 100% guarantee that you may or may not be able to convert someone. Even if you do, what are the chances that they won't wake up one day and figure" Well, I am done with that"? It's different for people with innate spanking needs and it is a whole other world for someone who is introduced to
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