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californiadreamer last won the day on July 26 2019

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About californiadreamer

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  1. An erotic spanking on the other hand is strictly something between the two partners, the need and also the boundaries estab lished
  2. From my standpoint, the difference between discipline and punishment is based on a spanking for a transgression or a spanking to make one aware of what will happen if such a transgression is in fact done. the mood is indeed quite different, and is is up to the top to delineate that difference thru words and tone, as well as giving what is needed to emphatically differentiate that difference to the ee. Often, it's the mood established that brings forth that difference. For if repect has been established, the tone of the spanking is in many cases even more effective than the intensity. Know
  3. To me, we are all people who have many facets to who we are. A person may have parts of themselves that crave either submission or dominance and for many reasons. But that in itself shouldn't define them or in any way create a situation which is not consensual. A connection to me is to take the time to converse and learn about each other and their particular needs and who they both indeed are. Respect and trust are so important regardless of whether one's need are of a submissive or dominant nature. That trust can only be achieved thru understanding the complexities of the other person.
  4. I wouldn't worry about pissing off racists. they love to be pissed off about something and unfortunately have many racists to bond with. Just like that mob who took joy in taking part in that treasonous activity in D.C. Try as they may, there is absolutely no justification for that act
  5. yeah, but poetry indicates thoughts AG. and my thought is that perhaps you should take the leap and experience spanking in it's purest form, in person and perhaps your views may change.
  6. First of all, these are your perceptions based upon your own thoughts. How much experience have you had and I mean in real life? Are you aware that many people have many different reasons for craving spankings? And quite frankly if in fact it's gratifying for them in different ways, why is that a negative thing? And if this is how you see things, then why are you here so much? And being here so much, perhaps it's best to focus on why you are attracted to spanking and not make generalizations about others based on your narrow views on something that you personally have never experienced i
  7. The consequence should be an open dialogue between the two. The top being open to hearing and also being open to the dialogue from the bottom. Any top who is not sensitive to honest feelings from the bottom, has no business being a top. As a top that is my view
  8. Honestly, I do believe that the bottom has every right and also the responsibility to communicate that to the top. If honesty is not involved, then the dynamic can very well be destroyed. This is a consensual relationship based on honesty and truth. If the top for some reason is not open to any issues with the relationship, then it's not a relationship based on trust and truth and in my experience will not last
  9. Good for you sassy. And for the same reason, I strongly advise everyone to be very careful who they share personal information with. That shouldn't occur until there has been a great deal of conversation accomplished and a good degree of trust and connection established. As you said, many of these people are just looking for instant gratification of the one handed variety. But there are some who are truly unbalanced and potentially dangerous. I applaud you for bringing this up sassy as it should be brought up from time to time to just make others aware of the danger. ]
  10. One has to know the person and what will get to them. For me, that has to be personalized to the individual. Sometimes the normal expressions are not sufficient as it makes it seem staged or roleplay. So for me it's something that is very individualized with the ee knowing full well that it's meant for them which turns it into a real and personal experience which I have found from experience brings forth the sub space necessary prior to the placement over the knee
  11. In my opinion it's like any other similar site except it is a means of finding people in your particular area. That being said, you can survey that area, find people that are in theory interested in things that you are also interested in exploring. At that point contact the person and if they do respond, and in a reasonable and intelligent way, continue that communication to see if a possible connection exists. SN is no different, except you are able to find possible connections in a closer area, that is if you are looking for a r/l situation. One never knows where and how they will fin
  12. Hey shy, one thing that I have found so very lovely is when the lady cooked a meal for me she did so with an apron on and nothing else on the lower section of her body. watching her cheeks bounce as she scurried around the kitchen displaying my recent handiwork was indeed a visual pleasure. Of course I couldn't resist entering and giving her some lovely smacks with my palm on her already reddened cheeks. It did extended my dominant headspace as well as her submissive one.
  13. I am shocked that you would even ask that question
  14. All of us have had those thoughts at one time or another. Particularly when our needs are not being gratified. Sometimes it makes us do or say things that we often regret. But the reality is, that it is indeed part of who we are. It's a strong force that is inside of us and it's perfectly natural to be frustrated and sometimes angry when that need is not gratified. Just realize that many of us share your frustrations and hopefully you will find someone who helps you fulfill them.
  15. The constant struggle between want and need The battle within about which to heed The powerful craving and the attempt to deny Yet the feelings exist and and deeply lie The suppression has existed for many years Bolstered by your doubts and your fears Often hoping that the craving will go away Yet it appears strongly each and ever day A scratch to itch, a raging plea To be soundly spanked, over a knee The knee of someone who knows you well And who desires to make your frustrations quell So darlin come to me in total trust But in
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