Where to start? I'm a 40 year old guy from the UK who has been into spanking his whole life. Always loved the site of a red bottom and well, from an early age, knew spanking was an interest. I've been on and off here for a year maybe or so, and every so often, try and suppress the interest but it always keeps coming back!!! So, I haven't been spanked since childhood, quite open to discussing and lot of my experience of being the spanker was when I was younger. Recently, I've had feelings of what it would be like to once again be spanked, which I do find strange as my life, I have been predominantly a spanker. I'm not sure though if it's the whole being bared thing and seen? I'm not sure. The thought of a spanking scares me massively. But also makes me nervous and gives me butterflies. Is it sexual? I genuinely am not sure. I have tried using an online mentor as not sure I'm brave enough in person and as good as it was, I want an in depth chat and discussion with someone who may be able to advise and possibly help. This may sound weird, but would prefer to talk to a woman - my spankings were by my mother and don't feel comfortable opening up and discussing with a guy - apologies guys! I'm not sure what else to say. Please, feel free to make contact. I'd love to feel that maybe I'm normal feeling this way! Thanks for taking the time to read this and hopefully, will be chatting to some of you soon.