Spanknutt

I found a wide heavy belt at the Goodwill store. I used contact cement to double the thickness and then cut it into a two-tailed tawse. I think it cost $2.00. An ex-partner gave me a cat-o-nine-tails she bought at a consignment shop once.

Games are fun to play. I have devised some games of chance with dice, etc. and "sports bets." I went to an "Interrogation" party a few years ago. One person would be given a secret and it was the job of the rest to force them to give up the secret. Same concept, slightly different methods.

I doubt you will find many, if any, here who have them. And even fewer who have spanked them.

I think the biggest difference between fantasy and reality is it hurts more than you imagined it would. You need to be prepared for that. I met my first EE at a kinky social event. Ditto for most of the others through munches, etc. although I am pretty well networked these days and they tend to find me. I was actually pretty nervous giving my first few spankings, especially the ones that were disciplinary as opposed to just for fun because I didn't really know what I was doing. If I could give my old self advice it would be "What are you waiting for? Life is short."

I would not have been as complete a person. I hid my desires for many years and when I finally confronted them and started sharing them with others it was very difficult and a huge step in my personal growth - the ability to be totally honest about myself without any feelings of guilt or worrying that someone might judge me was very powerful. But it taught me that if I can share that, I can share anything. I am more confident, well-adjusted, and happier now because of it. I love the following quote and have found it to be true: "Be so completely yourself that others are comfortable being themselves around you."

There is a difference between bratting and playful teasing. Banter back and forth, particularly intelligent banter, can be a lot of fun. One time when I was paddling a partner and giving her some pretty good whacks she said "have you started yet? Funny as Hell...

That has not been my experience. But then most of the people I associate with don't take themselves so seriously.

I have a flogger I made from screen spline. It is one of the most painful implements I own (as has been confirmed by those it has been used on).

Sometimes she will whimper writhe a bit, but mostly stays in place and doesn't protest. I don't spank for no reason - when it becomes necessary she knows she has earned it so what would be the point in complaining about it?

At my school, there would have been no need. I grew up in the 70's before they started holding educators accountable for abusive behavior. The paddlings they administered were brutal.

I have done quite a few scenes over the years that would be classified as BDSM where sex was not involved. Some people just enjoy receiving pain for the physical/emotional release it brings them.

The 50 Shades trilogy was written by someone who had zero experience with BDSM. Sometimes you just have to let your imagination guide you.

Spanknutt

When it's for discipline, it only takes a couple of minutes for me to get the job done. If it's for sensual, stress-relief, or just for fun, it can last much longer, easily up to an hour or more. That doesn't mean non-stop spanking - there is usually plenty of rubbing/massage, probably some teasing, etc. involved. Often I will incorporate other types of sensations along the way. And if someone's goal is subspace (a topic for another discussion probably), it usually does not happen quickly.

iPunishment is fine, I have been on for years. It is not well-moderated though and people get into pissing matches sometimes because there is no one to control it. I have some r/l friends who are on the site and I talk to them there sometimes. You can also respond to polls or post your own which is kind of fun. There is also a personal chat feature (as opposed to a chat room), like Facebook.