Spanknutt

Good point, we men tend not to thing about it from a female's perspective. It is...different.

There are vanilla people who know about me, but no one at work, ever. I have a really good friend and I waited until I left the company to tell him about it. And here's the big thing to me - you said, "Would genuinely appreciate her spanking me." She is married, you are married, and you work together. I doubt anything good would come from that, but something bad might.

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Why would anyone not tailor the rules? Everyone's goals and objectives are different. And I concur that the rules need to be agreed upon. They are not my rules, they are our rules.

Yes, it's fleshy so it's the safest place on the body to strike. Embarrassment, of course, would be a factor if it's bare. Beyond that, there may be sadistic component for some people, either consciously or unconsciously (Definition: the tendency to derive pleasure, especially sexual gratification, from inflicting pain, suffering, or humiliation on others). Having said that, there are cultures that use things like bastinado, flogging or caning the back, etc. for corporal punishment. And sexual torture has been used throughout history as a form of punishment in prisons, for political prisoners and such in some countries.

You might want to check out the Burning River SSC spanking group if you are on on Fetlife: https://fetlife.com/groups/81901/about They have a private Facebook page too, but not many members on there.

Question - is the person you broke trust with the one who will administer the discipline? If not, does that person know you will be disciplined? The the fact that you are willing to accept discipline for the infraction might be pretty powerful, especially if that person is vanilla. Of course, you might have to out yourself, but maybe that is what you need. Just a thought.

Without understanding the seriousness of the breach of trust, it would be difficult to offer an opinion on this. Sometimes an explanation and apology will go a long way, other times not so much. Acceptance of these depends a lot upon the other person. My sister did something a few years ago that damaged her relationship with her best friend. Despite explanation and apologies ad nauseum, their relationship was never the same again. Be honest and hope the other person is the type who knows how to forgive.

Ok, I'll play. My most memorable was not a disciplinary spanking, it was a long session with a friend at a party with a number of like-minded people in attendance. It was a two-story house and I had my friend kneeling over an ottoman in the basement area. It was a pretty long session and I used a number of implements on her. At one point I pulled her cheeks apart and spanked the inner slopes with a narrow paddle. Then I caned her. It wasn't much different from a lot of other sessions I have done, but what made it memorable was when I heard a guy calling upstairs, saying "Hey, come down here, you gotta' see this."

Of course it's ok. Some people go to therapists for help. We just do a different kind of "therapy." Now, I'm not suggesting that having a spanking mentor is a replacement for therapy for people who need that, but I think you know what I mean. Also, many women working in fields where they have to be "in control" all day want to hand the reins over to someone else when they get home. That is not unusual at all.

I think there may be a number of reasons why people seek this out. 1. Some people are not as organized as others and if you are not organized it is more difficult to manage your life. I have helped people set clear goals, with a schedule, and helped them stay focused when necessary using both positive and negative (spanking) rewards. 2. Adulting is not always easy and some people just like to have someone else in the ring swinging with them. 3. Some people are naturally submissive and feel more "whole" when they have someone to help direct them. 4. There is an element of sexuality associated with spanking that some people crave. It might be just as effective for your mentor to take your phone away for a few days, but we choose spanking as our preferred "consequences" when they are required. 5. Some of us just have a fascination with spanking that is part of our make-up and it will never go away. I'm sure others have their own reasons, but these are things I have observed over the years. "What do I lack to not be able to be self accountable?" You are certainly not alone. Many people have a lot going on in their heads and it makes it difficult for them to break things down into small enough pieces to accomplish them. Once someone gets overwhelmed, getting motivated to do something about it becomes increasingly difficult and they don't know where to start. Example - I have a friend who let her house get totally out of control. Every room was a disaster and she asked me to come over and help her get it cleaned up. I told her it's pretty simple - we start in a corner of the garage and work our way out. What she wanted to keep, what she wanted to donate, and what went out to the curb. then we moved to the next room. Two days later, the house was spotless and she has kept it that way ever since. But there was no way for her to see her way through the clutter t get started. Although we were spanking partners, no spanking was required for this, just someone to help her compartmentalize things. I don't know you, so I don't know if helps answer your question.

I'm curious, do you have a way to get yourself free if something were to happen to him while you are restrained? I have always used a false tie, safety snap, etc. when doing restraints one-on-one. Something to think about.

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