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Explorify last won the day on September 29 2019

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  1. Those desiring more detail on this subject may want to read here: https://www.malechastityjournal.com/2018/09/10/how-to-give-an-effective-spanking/ https://www.malechastityjournal.com/2018/09/14/effective-spanking-part-2-how-to-spank-me/ https://strictjuliespanks.blogspot.com/2013/03/beating-your-man-properly.html?zx=f5a92b551492a4d5
  2. Two words from the perspective of an 'er. It is the fact that clothing tends to make it considerably more difficult to see what impact one is having, a special problem for inexperienced 'ers. Therefore, I think it would be a good idea if you could arrange a system (e.g. every 5 belt licks), for a quick pull-down of the bottom covering for him to check this. -Ex.
  3. A few comments: 1. Effectively these are safewords. 2. As to "consensual non-consent" there isn't such a thing legally. It can always be withdrawn. I would not advise anyone to test the limits of the criminal law on this. 3. Leaving the previous point aside, I am having a great deal of trouble seeing the downside to the existence of such an arrrangement. If it is never used, fine. Just like the airbag in my car. There has never been one deployed in my decades of driving experience and I hope it will never happen, but It's hard to argue that it shouldn't be there. -Ex.
  4. Crazy 2020 - might it make sense to see a professional, and get the experience without needing to worry about the IRL aftermath in the context of a continuing relationship? -Ex.
  5. I would suggest that you do nothing. As things stand, it is true that he gets a bit aroused at the beginning but that is probably as much embarrassing as anything else. And as you say, it quickly goes away. If you go for the option of having him take care of business first that will solve the first problem and increase his physical pain during the punishment but will preclude having sex afterwards. If you go for a chastity device, in addition to whatever inappropriate pain and distraction it may cause, that may actually serve to put his mental focus exactly where you don't want it. See my first line. -Ex.
  6. Try the thread in this forum called "Humiliation." -Ex.
  7. From both sides, I find the diaper position very powerful. As an 'er, one of the many things I like about it is that I can gaze directly into her eyes and require her to look into mine. -Ex.
  8. I know that some people think that lying there in silence is a sign of submission. To me, that is defiance. So as ‘ee, I like being forced to own the punishment. I like being reminded of the embarrassing position I am in and being forced to repeat back what it is, and why it is justified, to request the next stage, and to thank for being punished. -Ex.
  9. You may be luck in this regard. For some people, aspects (including nakedness) that were very embarrassing at first become more routine over time - which is why additional tweaks need to be added. Ex.
  10. I agree with the distinction in the first sentence above. For example, it is not unusual for men to have erections at regular intervals overnight purely as part of their sleep cycles and unrelated to sexual thoughts. Similarly when women become wet in an assaultative situation that is understood as a bodily response to protect against threatened injury, and is in no way an expression of erotic desire. Hence, the key line from the above post: Its really important to keep that in mind as both a spanker and a spankee, but especially a spanker, to not misconstrue what is going on. -Ex.
  11. As I mentioned in a previous thread, I know I was already interested by about age 5 or so. At that time I once eagerly joined in a game in which a slightly older boy spanked both me and a girl my age bare-bottom lying flat on the ground. I enjoyed seeing her get it, and I got a thrill when he pointed out that she had seen my bare behind as I got it. And on my first day of first grade I speculated openly with one of my classmates as to whether the female teacher would spank us across her lap and told him that I liked being spanked. Nothing actually happened in those years but I eagerly pursued the subject in any kind of reading I could get my hands on. I think the additional interest in doing the spanking myself came with puberty. -Ex.
  12. Inspired by a recent experience, you can have the 'ee when nude do calesthenics (e.g. jumping jacks, lying on back bring knees to chest). -Ex.
  13. Explorify


    It would seem to me that spanking is an element of a DD relationship, not a substitute for one. Therefore, it might be time for an item-by-item review of the overall goals, and how the rules are working to achieve them. Then re-write accordingly. -Ex.
  14. I've heard this blather too. I urge you and everyone else to reject it as reflecting simple ignorance and not let it get into your head. In my case, as an undoubtedly straight male, I get a powerful thrill from both sides. And if I were "really" anything - that is, if I were for some reason confined to one role or the other - it would probably be 'er. Like you, which side I am on depends on the circumstances. So far, it's always been the same role with any one person. But I could imagine changing that up too. -Ex.
  15. ================= Limits should always be respected. As jaded said, if a spankee is uncomfortable baring their bottom, their limits should be respected and a lighter spanking should be given. Survey or not, each individual has their own limits and desires. =============================================== Lest there be any doubt, I am 100% in agreement with this, and with all the other comments to the effect that whatever is done should be the subject of advance consultation and agreement. -Ex.
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