Jump to content
Create New...

Leaderboard

Popular Content

Showing content with the highest reputation since 02/22/22 in all areas

  1. This is just a vent mostly, no need to tell me this is the internet and it’s just how it goes, etc, but does anyone else ever get tired of the fakes and the stories? Being real with someone, sharing your experiences, your lows and highs, only to be met with obvious fantasy scenarios? Being a spanko can be lonely, desperately lonely, and it always sucks to feel like you’re making a connection with someone or you’re putting yourself out there, and then you get met with fantasy and bullshit. I wish people felt like they could be real and didn’t have to lie to get their kicks on here. Navigating a spanking relationship is so hard as it is!
    9 points
  2. We're in our mid 30's. Maybe closer to pushing 40 if I'm being honest. And we've been together since our early 20's. I've always had a spanking fetish. Every fantasy I've ever had has involved me getting spanked. I remember asking a boyfriend to spank me for the first time in my teens. Little taps. Other boyfriends gave a few wimpy slaps. A good spanker is seemingly impossible to find. I fully confessed my desires to my husband shortly after we married. Spankings. Real ones. Hard. For punishment, not sex. It's a weirdly sexual but not sexual fetish. I don't quite understand but that's the way it is for me I like the before and the after, not the spanking itself. At least not when receiving. But you can't get the before or the after any other way. He obliged the best he could. Finally I had some marks. Lovely bruises. Sitting sore for a day or two. One time I even cried. But it never amounted to anything consistent and that's what I wanted. A DD lifestyle I suppose. Sometimes I'd get angry and frustrated. He's so much larger than me, by a foot and about a hundred pounds. He just looks dominant. Intimidating even. He should be dominant. But deep down I knew that wasn't the case. Because I ran things. Our household. Appointments. Finances. Outings. Everything. So I gave up. He couldn't even spank me unless I told him to. Disappointing I guess but there's porn. Even most of that isn't right though. Oh well, nothing I can do about that (but read on, there is!) Fast forward a decade or so to get right up to the present. Or the very recent past if you want to be specific. My husband and I had been quarling every night after I got home from work. (We work different shifts). The house wasn't getting picked up. We have young kids, it's hard, I know. But when he comes home from work the house is in order. When I come home it's a disaster and there he is snoozing away leaving it for me the next day. So this is the fight we'd been having for weeks. Maybe months. I'd start bitching at him until he got out of bed and picked up. I tried telling him so many times how important it was to me to have the house in order. Not perfect, just not a disaster. I became a nag and he resented that and just started tuning me out. I resented him too I started thinking about how he comes across as so dominant. And I don't know what made it finally click but my husband is not dominant. Ignoring me, Rudeness, Snottiness and Laziness aren't dominant traits. They're immature and unacceptable. And begging for a spanking. If anyone should have known that it's me. How could I have been so blind for all these years? My husband is a brat. I texted him while he was at work and told him that I was going to spank him. He balked. No, no, he would spank me for the mere suggestion. Again I told him I was going to spank him. That I was tired of the messy house. That he was tired of the nagging. That I didn't like the nagging myself. I was going to spank him and after it was over and done with it would be a win-win situation for us both. A clean house for me and no more getting bitched at for him. He agreed but said he was going to spank me 10x what ever he got. I reminded him he has always had my concern to discipline me if I need it and that won't change but I was going to spank him because he deserved it. I promised I would go easy on him and use only my hand... this time anyway. He's kind of a baby. When he got home I shut the curtains and told him to drop trou and bend over the arm of the couch. My husband who towers over me, who can be such a (dearly loved) asshole, who put up such a fuss in our texts over this, did exactly as I instructed during a blink. I didn't even get to see it. And so there he was, just like that, bare bottom in the air. I've never seen a view like that before. The porn I watch is of a female bottom because that is what I relate too. But okay, I can do this because I know exactly how it should be done. I've been imagining the perfect technique for decades. Just never did I think this is how I would experience it. I started spanking. Not too hard at first, mostly just stinging. I increased the intensity and he said "Wow, OK" which doesn't mean a lot to you but I know my husband and I knew he was expressing his surprise at how hard I was spanking him given his earlier threat of spanking me 10x harder. (That he's yet to make good on and I doubt he ever will) He stayed in position better than I've ever been able to but his hand came back a time or two. Any place he managed to rub got some extra attention. I put some focus on his sit spots and made sure he was getting rosy all over. It was kind of cute. I really didn't expect to be turned on. I was just about to finish up but he reached around to try and smack my ass. He shouldn't be feeling so playful during a punishment. I know enough to know that the top of the thighs are quite sensitive so when he did this I dodged and started spanking him there. He bucked and exclaimed that he's never spanked me there before. Well, he shouldn't have done that. Once he started to behave again I gave him a few more all over and let him up. And up he was. I let him know that next time there would be more, that from now on what he just got would be the warm up. That I'd not go so easy on him ever again. But that being said I'm a big believer in kissing and making up, no details there. I talked to him about it the next day, about how I wanted to do this as a from now on kind of thing. He first said that I shouldn't get used to it. So I told him how much I enjoyed spanking him. And even though it embarrassed him I told him I knew he enjoyed it too. And it's true. And it's something I never would have expected from either of us. Not once in all my years have I ever had the desire or thought to spank someone before. Not once has he ever expressed a desire to be spanked. But really I just had to say it again and he gave in all too easily to be anything other than a dead giveaway. I think he can see the difference it made too even if he doesn't want to admit it. There's no shame between us. And we both know how much he needed it. Heck, I almost can't wait until he needs another one. Fortunately (or maybe unfortunately?) he's a good sub. Our home has been kept in order while I'm at work. I had given him a couple other spankable offenses to start with and he's minded my word to the letter. His attitude towards me has totally changed and our interactions are different in the best of ways. I feel like all these years he just needed to be spanked even more than I ever wanted to be. So here I am, a bottom who became a top and I definitely like the view.
    8 points
  3. ...do women scare you?
    8 points
  4. This sounds like a pretty bad take on women’s sexuality. 🤷🏻‍♀️
    8 points
  5. Why don't you tell people that up front? You could put it in the About Me section of your profile. Something like, "I only play with single people," or, "I do not play with married/partnered people unless they have the informed consent of their spouse/partner." And then, if you get into conversing with someone, mention that early on, and don't proceed with them if it turns out that they have an unknowing or unconsenting partner. You can't control what other people do. You can control who you engage with.
    6 points
  6. We were talking in chat the other day about how difficult it can be for folks to meet other spankos. We talked about what makes a good introduction / personal ad / profile, what encourages follow-up, etc. What are some things you look for in an ad or profile or message? What pointers can you give those who are struggling to meet other spankos? For me, I like a lot of detail in an introduction - role, favorite things, what spanking means to that spanko, what s/he is looking for, etc. Just posting "hey, I need to spank / be spanked" is not enough. Domhole (or Dommehole) behavior is a turn-off. I am not your sub - don't act like we are not on equal footing. I have heard so many other women voice this same complaint. Being Toppy is one thing - I love that - but let's get to know each other a bit first. Basically, treat me like a human and not just an ass to spank. What guidance can you provide other spankos to help with communication?
    6 points
  7. A couple years back I was on a roadtrip with a girlfriend at the time. We had just left where we'd stopped for breakfast and she was going to drive for a while. We'd already talked about being on her phone while driving and she'd been warned before so I wasn't having it when I saw her on her phone again. Scolding her, I took her phone and told her she'd better find somewhere to pull off. A couple miles up, I directed her onto an exit and we found a little pull out by a gated forrest road. Getting out of the truck on the passenger side opposite the road, I had her slide over and get out on my side. Turning her around to lean into the truck, I made her hold onto the seat while I took hold of the back of her waistband of her leggings and began spanking her over them with my hand. She squirmed and pouted but she knew she had this coming to her. It wasnt until I stopped and she could hear me undoing my belt that she seemingly realized this wasn't going to be just a few swats. She pleaded and tried to stand up but a stern warning got her hands right back on the truck seat. Still holding the back of her pants, I folded the belt over and swung it across her butt and tops of her thighs as she bucked and howled and started to cry. After a moment, I yanked down her pants and she again tried to stand. Taking her arm, I let her stand as I held her still and swung the belt onto her butt again. She tried to retreat back into the cover of the truck, but I held her there standing with her pants at her knees spanking her beside the truck. When I stopped, her face was deep red and she was sobbing. The spanking hadn't been nearly as harsh as she might have gotten at home but the situation seemed to double the effect. After making her promise this would be the last time we'd be having this issue, I hugged her and comforted her before helping her up into the truck with her pants still down. I put on my belt as I made my way around to the drivers side. We talked for another minute or so before taking off down the road again. After a few minutes, she was curled up on the bench seat laid over onto my lap and ended up napping through the morning's drive.
    6 points
  8. So, your requirements include no Republicans, period? Or just no Trump supporters? What about anti-Trump Republicans? Conservative independents? Libertarians? Feel free to set any compatibility requirements you feel are necessary. We all have them. Just be clear on where you're drawing the line. Personally, I don't think I'd be compatible with anyone who wears a Maga hat, but not every Republican, and not every conservative, is in that camp. I'm also fine with just not discussing politics with a spanking partner. If this person were also going to be my life partner, then politics wouldn't be completely avoidable, but that's a bridge to cross if we get there. If you are seeking a partner, why not fill out the About Me section in your profile? There, you can spell out what you are and are not interested in. Including the kind of dynamic you want, age/gender preference, politics, and anything else you feel is important.
    6 points
  9. This is a great question, thanks for asking it. Personally, I’d say it really depends on the type of spanking. A disciplinary/correction type of spanking (which are effective for me) may not be as long as the other types, but still does need to be long enough to break through walls of stubbornness. The pain level for this type also varies I suppose, but I’d say if I haven’t spent at least a little time truly desperate for it to end? I don’t know if it can be called a punishment. I don’t “enjoy” these spankings, but there IS an emotional enjoyment from the fact that someone cares enough to do it. I do, however, enjoy all the other types of spanking. I think for pretty much every other kind of spanking, for me longer is better because it takes me a while sometimes to really let go. Proper warm up is of course a huge part of tolerance, but as long as that’s there…the pain and enjoyment mingle and become something new.
    6 points
  10. Getting to Know You The last few weeks have been a bit unusual. I have been contacted in chat by a few Tops/ERs who want to immediately jump into a disciplinary scolding about how naughty I am - and how I deserve to be spanked (usually to tears). The truth is - I am just not that naughty. I don't cry from spanking. And I only enjoy roleplay with the people who take the time to learn about me and who freely share their own nuances. That openness makes for a better roleplay. One of my favorite things to do in chat is to ask questions - because it allows me to learn about other spankos and their interests. I enjoy sharing ideas and fantasies and experiences. Some folks don't care if we get to know each other - and want to jump right into a scene. When I say that I don't want to roleplay, they insist it isn't a RP, but that I need real discipline for [insert reason here]. Why in the world would I jump into discipline with someone I have never chatted with before? I tend to take discipline very seriously - even though that is an aspect of spanking that I am not actively seeking right now. It would not be appropriate (for me) to have that role filled by just anyone. I knew my last disciplinary partner for years - and even then we were continually learning from each other. All of this babbling is just to say - get to know each other beyond age / sex / location. You will have a much more fulfilling conversation or roleplay if you learn about the other person. *Drawing by Hardcastle
    6 points
  11. yeah I totally relate to this...I love to just talk to people on here...about their experiences and feelings around spanking or just about life and not even anything do with spanking...it's all about making a connection like you say... but then there are the people with the ridiculous personas...some of that's around spanking...like they'll claim they're 25 years old and living with their mom...who happens to spank them every night...and also while they're fully nude...uh huh...or they have a harem of 100 women who they spank every night or something...yep right... then with some others it's not even about spanking...like one guy here told me this elaborate story about how the mob was after him and had burned down all his mansions all over the world... I mean fantasy stuff is fun...I've done some roleplays on here and I loved it...but when you're trying to have a REAL conversation and make a connection with someone...well...it just sucks to have them act like that...
    6 points
  12. I'm fond of "funishment." My ex was like your husband; DD was beyond his comfort zone. It wouldn't have been the right dynamic for us anyway, since I led our relationship. But he developed a vigorous enjoyment of funishment when I was the one on the receiving end. If I was doing some lighthearted bratting, he would eventually announce the "consequence" for my behavior (Yesss! ), and when he got me home, he would jump into his role with gusto. I think folks sometimes view funishment as goofy play with patty cake swats.... "You naughty little girl! I'm going to give you a spanking!" But you guys can make it as gentle and fun, or as intense and realistic, as you choose. Trust me, a funishment spanking can really sting! But it lacks real disappointment and has more of a "this is fun!" vibe. Any anger expressed is just the part being acted out. And while sex after DD is a faux pas, no one will tell you that you can't get wild under the covers after a "funishment" session. Just a side note... During our spanking scenes, we used different names from our real ones, like actors do when playing a role. This made it easier for my husband. While he cringed at the idea of swatting his wife, he had no problem giving a vigorous spanking to the plucky gal whose character I played. This tactic may not work for anyone else, but thought I'd mention it, because for him it made all the difference.
    6 points
  13. I am very interested in honest feedback on my first attempt to post a spanking video I created. https://www.spankingtube.com/video/121162/spanking-adult-stephanie-car-crash-dude-spanking
    5 points
  14. When my wife gives me a spanking, here is how it usually goes down. pre-spanking lecture “honey come in the living room we need to talk” she then calmly asks me if I remember something we agreed to that I didn’t do or something she asked me to stop doing but I haven’t like for example letting garbage pile up. she says “I am going to have to give you a spanking”. I then say “oh no honey please” ”yes that’s what is going to happen. I hope this will help you remember. Now go to the bedroom and fetch me the plastic cane and hairbrush (or whatever other implements she decides)”. I come out and she makes me hold them as she slowly takes down my pants and then my underwear, and then has me get over her lap. She will ask questions like “what is going to happen to you right now? Why is this happening?” I need to say “i did x or haven’t done y. I am going to be getting spanked”. she also tells me “bury your face in the screaming pillow we don’t want to disturb our neighbours” pretty soon the cane and hairbrush start smacking down on my butt hard. She changes from one to the other and I am soon wriggling and gasping “ow ow ow it hurts” ”it’s supposed to hurt honey that’s why it’s a spanking” ”we are going to turn your butt nice and red” “we haven’t even started yet, stay still” afuer a few minutes she says “ok, go yo the bedroom and think about what you have done. I will call you out for round two when I’m ready” im usually in the bedroom gingerly touching my butt which has some welts and is red and is kind of glowing warm but I know it is going to be far worse soon. After a few minutes “ok honey come out now. Bring the strap and paddles and loopy Johnny and belt” (usually just two or 3 of them not all. I come out and she has the hide away bed rolled away with pillows for me to lie on. “lie down on the pillows” sometimes I try to mumble I’ve learned my lesson do we have to do this and she will say “I’ll decide when you’ve learned your lesson, we have a lot to go”. She sometimes will spray my butt with cold water or put a warm microwaved heat pad on and then the second part will begin. When she uses the paddle she makes me put on underwear because they have holes and it’s to avoid bleeding. Then she will pull them down when she moves to other implements. When it’s the belt or strap she just keeps me bare bottomed. The second half is much longer and I am wriggling and screaming into my pillow and moving all over the pillow and burying my hands in the covers and the implements come down full force. Thw whole butt is spankee very thoroughly and especially the sit spots are hell as is any part that she hits several times continuously. she will often pause and ask “tell me again why you are getting this”. She will also tell me how my carelessness affects her as she is hitting. She will sometimes ask “why am I hurting you right now” and I have to say “so I don’t do x again”. After a long good few minutes it’s back to the bedroom. By that time I’m moaning and my butt is very bruised and sensitive to touch. she usually calls me out for a third round lying down also very lengthy. By this point I’m screeching into the pillow, sweating up a storm, wriggling, sometimes turning over to which she says “get back into position, move your butt up”. Sometimes she will pop me once or twice on the upper thighs. she takes periodic breaks, to drink some water or to get the laundry while I lie there, sometimes after she puts a heat pad on my butt which both hurts more and also makes it more sensitive to more strokes. shw uses a variety of implements, switching from one to the other Then more corner time and when I come out again she sits on the floor and has me to over her knee and she goes usually with the hairbrush and plastic cane. This part is much shorter but already on a completely bruised and welted and sensitive butt so I am having the same reaction as the other two times. thwn she says “ok honey we’re done” and I bury my head in her chest and then we snuggle.
    5 points
  15. I was spanked by a stranger for trespassing and mischief on his property back when I was 19 one summer evening. I choose a spanking over getting in trouble.
    5 points
  16. 5 points
  17. Brittygirl expressed it best. This is over the line.
    5 points
  18. I am in the process of helping my Parents review and modify their Home Owners Insurance Policy, and just look at what I found. Corporal Punishment: EXCLUSIONS was revised. Bodily injury or personal injury because of or arising out of corporal punishment administered by or at the direction of an insured is excluded. Oh My Goodness!
    5 points
  19. I can't help but do everything I can to resist when the paddling starts. I can't help it. It hurts bad. But when I do hop around and squirm on his lap I'm afraid I'm making him angry because he thinks I'm being a brat. But I'm not. It just hurts so bad. It's best when the ER is an expert. The experts are amazing! They can hold me totally still somehow on their lap and really paddle me hard. That way I can do nothing about it. At that point I turn limp and get what's coming to me.
    5 points
  20. In life, it is very rare when expectations meet reality. I had an opportunity to meet in person someone who frequents the site on occasion. Not only was the person the exact type of person she portrays on site but in spite of the adverse circumstances of her visiting, she followed through on her promise to meet if she ever got up this way, which is something that doesn't always happen. So Birdy thank you for a wonderful day and may it not be the last time
    5 points
  21. My Daddy always told me if you don't have anything nice to say then don't say it at all especially if no one asked you. He also told me that if you are the one unwilling to hear the other side of the argument then you are probably the one in the wrong. It kinda feels like you are going out of your way to want to state your opinion and tell everybody that if they don't agree with you then they should just go to a word my Daddy has told me I'm not allowed to say. Manners, truth, and common sense are what's missing from this world.
    5 points
  22. Your post is entitled "I really hate to do this...but". Well, I really hate to read this...here. Please understand MNee, I do not begrudge you your opinion, but I don't understand your need to share it here. I belong to SN to share opinions about spanking, not politics. Regardless of your opinion, please don't ram it down my throat.
    5 points
  23. I don't know if I would classify spanking as a legit therapy, but it does help different people in different ways.... especially stress relief. A therapist/counselor is needed for true mental health needs. Spanking alone will not modify behavior. The person needs to want to modify their behavior, actions, goals, etc. Someone could beat the hell out of me and it wouldn't change a thing unless I wanted it to. Spanking gives me the push I need, an emotional release and guilt relief when I mess up. I'm straight and have never been spanked by a woman. I've always been curious to feel the difference.
    5 points
  24. Mine always come off, I don’t think I’ve ever kept them on haha
    5 points
  25. Whoa - perhaps before attacking one of the most respected contributors on the board - you should consider checking yourself. Maybe take a look in the mirror and see how high your horse is… just saying I agree with Britty H- this isn’t the fiction section and that’s one hell of a fairy-tale. If it was roleplay and she isn’t a massage therapist - maybe include those details. Otherwise, it reads as a complete fantasy,or as, Chawsee pointed out - totally of the rails for a reputable licensed massage therapist. Either way, there are a lot of great contributors in this board- maybe consider learning from them on how to best participate instead of attacking when they call bs. just my 2 cents
    5 points
  26. Sounds like a fantasy. But if this is actually a true story, what your massage therapist did is illegal. She could, and should, lose her license for such inappropriate misconduct with a client. One of my closest female friends is a professional massage therapist, and the guidelines they are bound to are very exacting. Grabbing a client's genitals is a severe violation, as is paddling someone. Strictly forbidden.
    5 points
  27. This is just vague enough to be utterly confusing.
    5 points
  28. Thank you for your sweet words, Britty. I want to see this be a success for you, and you have a good head on your shoulders, so you're already ahead of the game there. I know exactly what you mean about the challenges of having a vanilla partner. You're now facing what I faced many moons ago-- having to be content that he's willing to play along, and that he'll talk it out, at least to some extent. We dyed-in-the-wool spankos truly are hardwired this way, and vanillas struggle to understand how this feels for us, even when they want to understand it. One of my closest female friends is vanilla. Her boyfriend is a spanko (something I detected long before he came out of the closet). How she got this lucky, I will never know! But she doesn't see it that way at all. One day she'll come to me, filled with curiosity and asking questions. I've spanked her boyfriend on two separate occasions, and coached her on how to do it herself. One minute she's on-board. Then the next time we talk, she's saying to me, "I just don't get it. Why would anyone want to be spanked? And why can't you people just love normally?" So when we choose a vanilla mate, it really comes down to trying to make it fun for them. Maybe watch to see if you notice any part of spanking that your husband seems to enjoy, and then focus as much of your attention as possible on that aspect. And, of course, enjoy the afterglow together. Thankfully, there are success stories. Even my hubby got to where he had fun with it.
    5 points
  29. I have ALWAYS been into spanking, as a kid it felt just like some morbid fascination (looking it up in the dictionary, playing it with my dolls, trying to get the neighborhood kids to play “house” etc), but I was never spanked as a kid and have no trauma attached to it. In middle/high school is when I began really researching and reading what it was I was into. I watched videos, I read stories, I WROTE very bad fan fiction. I knew it was a part of me and I knew it was something I would never tell anyone else about. 🤣 Once I left the house and was free to really explore the spanko side of myself, I felt a lot freer even though there was still shame attached. I only ever met up with one spanko to experience it when I was about 19. I would continuously look up the local spanking munch then chicken out because I was terrified of being outed. But spanking is not about discipline for me, not even a little bit. It is about my love of spanking, of being spanked, of the eroticism and fantasy of it and everything that surrounds it. And as an adult I can recognize that’s what it is about for me and always has been.
    4 points
  30. The discipline part doesn't apply to me, but I've had spanking fantasies forever. It finally dawned on me when I was around 20 that my spanking fantasies were sexual fantasies. Up until then, I thought I didn't have sexual fantasies. While I enjoy vanilla sex irl, I don't fantasize about it. All my arousing fantasies are about being spanked. That's always been so. But even when I made the connection, I thought for years that spanking was something I wanted in fantasy but would never want in reality. In my mid twenties, I got into a serious relationship that ended up lasting ten years. During that time, even early on, he sometimes playfully threatened to spank me, but nothing came of it. I still thought it was something I didn't really want, just a fantasy. Sometime in my late twenties/early thirties, I discovered the spanko internet. I don't remember how, but I do remember reading spanking stories and realizing I was aroused by them, and realizing I was probably a spanko to some degree. But it took me a couple of years after that to screw up the nerve to ask my partner to spank me. Eventually I did, and we incorporated spanking into our sex life. He liked it to some degree, I think, but what he mostly liked was turning me on. He wasn't that into spanking for himself. I could get him to give me orgasms with a spanking, but I also desired more intense spankings, sometimes, than he was ever willing to give me. That relationship ultimately ended for unrelated reasons, and I've been single ever since. I've decided that my next relationship is going to have to have a spanko side to it, and it will need to be with someone who desires both spanking and sex as much as I do, only who wants to be the spanker.
    4 points
  31. For me the embarrassing part is the language my spanker chooses and what he points out about my spanking. He likes to start my spankings with me next to his side, my panties being lowered for me with my hands behind my back as I am told what a foolish naughty little girl I am and I'm going to spanked. He will lower me over his lap and say things like "how do naughty little girls get spanked?" And expect me to answer "on the bare bottom". I HATE it. With my entire soul. Its foolish and shameful, and embarrasses every last bone in my body. He knows this, and that's exactly why he does it. During the spanking he likes to comment on different elements and do his best to make my face turn as red as my bottom. "Remind me what im doing. What am I doing? Am I spanking your bottom bright red like a bad little girl? Bad girls get red sore bottoms don't they?" "Look at you kicking your legs like a well-spanked little girl. Are you getting the spanking your deserve? Tell me you deserve a sore red bottom." "I can see your tears but your bottom isn't halfway to red little girl. Tell me out loud you want a redder bottom, and you deserve to be spanked more". None of these questions are allowed to be unanswered. It doesn't matter how many times I've said the words he won't let me get away with not answer his awful questions out loud. He always goes out of his way to make me pick up the panties I kicked off when I was crying and blubbering and put them back on - but only to my knees before he makes me stand in the corner. Then he comments on what a bright red spanked bottom I have. Makes me answer his questions on how I feel with my panties to me knees with a hot sore bottom in the corner, makes me say "I deserve to be have a sore spanked bottom".
    4 points
  32. How to spank a submissive to teach proper discipline in a loving manner. This is what I follow to discipline my loving wife. Number 1: CONSENSUAL, it must be consensual. There is absolutely no alternative whatsoever. No consent means no consent, do not pressurize her to submit to you if she doesn't want to. Situation: She lied that she finished her share of the chores but actually goofed around. You had warned her of strict consequences earlier. Ideally what should you do? #Calm down first. NEVER scold or spank when you are not calm. 1. Make her stand between your legs while you sit on the couch. 2. Give her a scolding and explain to her why lying to you is wrong. Make sure she feels remorseful for defying your authority. My wife starts crying when I scold her, and she is remorseful. 3. Bare her bum (no clothes below waist) and send her to the corner (holding her ears) so she can ponder over her bad girl behavior. 4. Once she has served sufficient corner time (10 to 40 minutes, your wish) call her to the spanking chair. 5. Tell her that you love her and you will help her become the well disciplined wife she wants to become. 6. Take her over your knee and rub her bum for a minute and compose your thoughts for her scolding. 7. Start with a sound hand spanking for 5-6 minutes and keep lecturing her. Continue till she is crying out of guilt and not pain. Be mindful you do not bruise her OR break her limits OR make her bleed. You are her head and she is your submissive, so you are responsible to keep her safe, healthy, disciplined and MOST IMPORTANTLY loved+happy. If you abuse her, you deserve to be thrown into jail. 8. Make her get up and bring a hair brush/ wooden spatula/ switch/ paddle. If needed, take her to the bathroom for a mouth washing with soap. 9. Give her an appropriate number of strokes of the implement depending on her pain tolerance, the offense, condition of her bum, her guilt level. 10. Make her count and repeat a line on what she did wrong. 11. After finishing the spanking, tell her what will happen if she repeats this mistake and give her a follow through punishment like bedtime spankings, lines, grounding, diaper punishment etc. 12. Hug her, cuddle with her, tell her she is forgiven, tell her you love her, tell her she is safe. Give her proper aftercare and keep talking to her. Let her cry on your shoulder/chest. My wife cries in my chest/shoulder for 10 minutes AFTER the spanking is over and I hug her and talk to her in a voice one uses to talk to little kids. That calms her down, find what calms your sub and properly make them feel better. - Try not to have sex that night.. Since she behaved like a bad girl earlier, she loses the privilege of sex. Do something platonic but close with her. I lay her down over me and we read a story together, any novel and she falls asleep on me, which is SUPER CUTE. THis is our every night routine, not only punishment night routine. - Keep giving her small, non-painful maintenance spankings [light hand smacks for 4-5 minutes] every 4-5 days. It will help her feel better (if she consents to it obviously) and act as a therapy. - Give her lots of kisses on platonic areas like forehead, cheek etc. - Be consistent. Consensually create boundaries for her in general life to safely explore and enjoy in and define consequences for breaking the boundaries. Consistently follow through so that she feels safe around you. End quote: If your Sub feels safe around you, loves you, knows you love her, knows you will support her, knows you will keep you safe, knows you will discipline her when needed and knows you will keep her happy and her best interests, YOU ARE A PERFECT DOM. I try to be my wife's perfect Dom, for she is my soulmate and my perfect Sub. In a loving relationship with a beautiful submissive lady for 2-3 years.
    4 points
  33. UPDATE: If anyone here needs to reach me, I am on FetLife, under the same username, Chawsee. While I am also a member of Jillian Keenan's Patreon group "Kinking Out Loud," and I really enjoy her videos (when I have the time to watch them), I don't find that site to be the interactive community that I thought it was. Or perhaps I just don't know what the heck I'm doing? 🤔😁
    4 points
  34. I'm trying to dip my toes in the water a little bit on this huge interest of mine.
    4 points
  35. 4 points
  36. Hello everyone! I just wanted to make an actual announcement. Every post with a link or image in it is set to moderator approval first. This is due to a spam/ security reason. Overtime our spam system will start to recognize safe/ non spam links. Please be patient as we approve posts, status updates, etc. In private messages direct file images have been removed for now as we aren't vetting PM's for approval.
    4 points
  37. I agree with the above comment. Obviously I don't know the nature of your conversations or the people you are talking to, but if you are upfront at the very beginning it weeds out a lot of those you are incompatible with. You also have to realize this is the internet. People can easily lie and conceal who they are. Someone could easily say all the right things, just to end up being a liar. Also some people just disappear and others wont have the same intentions as you. The best thing is to keep expectations low and gradually increase them as the relationship grows.
    4 points
  38. When my wife and I first began to explore spanking, we switched back and forth. However, my wife quickly realized that she HATED being spanked. Right around that time we stumbled upon the DWC (Disciplinary Wives Club) and decided that F/m DD was a better fit for us. She was vanilla when we met . . . still is for the most part. She simply realizes that spanking me on a (somewhat) consistent basis is beneficial.
    4 points
  39. I think it tends to be pretty overwhelmingly M/F in the spanking community, although there does seem to be a lot of male spankees on sites like this, female spankers tend to be rarer or already in committed relationships or want to be paid for it. I don’t think it’s accurate to say a lot of women get enjoyment out of it; I think it’s much more commonly the other way around.
    4 points
  40. I don't brat (or get an attitude with) a Spanker unless I know they are comfortable with it. The Top has to consent to bratting. Otherwise, getting an attitude with strangers on the Internet is just being rude.
    4 points
  41. For a majority of my life, I've had conservative policies and views RAMMED down my throat by friends and family. Being a staunch Democrat I have come to resent, and even disowned a few family members because of differences of opinion. Basically, I try to respect ppl's views on politics, but usually turns ugly....QUICK. I'm very thin skinned and do get offended easily. So therefor, I'd prefer you be a left leaning supporter if you wish to get with me. No offense if you're a republican supporter, we just have nothing in common. However, if you're a trump supporter....you can GTH! Sorry, it's how i feel. Have a good day! 🙂
    4 points
  42. This woman is 21. Neither of her parents should be involved in spanking her period. Neither should you even entertain the idea.
    4 points
  43. Hey Friends, Please do not send PMs to me anymore here on SN. A few days ago I added a note about this to the "About Me" section of my profile, but people aren't seeing it and PMs continue to trickle in. I am working to get my own spanking blog launched, where I will continue to ponder old-fashioned maternal-style spanking, and where those who like my writing and philosophy may remain engaged, if they would like to. Until the blog materializes, I can be reached on FetLife under the same username, Chawsee. This will probably be temporary, though. I had trepidation about joining Fet, and when I finally did, I almost deleted my account that first night. FetLife has its merits, but every time I visit I see things that I would rather not be exposed to. I plan to keep my account open there, however, until my blog is up and running, so that members can still reach me. I have also joined Jillian Keenan's Patreon group "Kinking Out Loud," though she is away on a trip, as I understand it, and I have not yet received my log-in info there. But I've been told that it's a terrific group of people. So in the near future, I will be reachable there, as well, again under the same username, Chawsee.
    4 points
  44. Am I the only ER on here who can hear an EE rolling her eyes over the phone?
    4 points
  45. Everyone has their own wants and needs, and every spanking relationship is unique. I personally do not want to be 'humiliated' but find the inherent embarrassment of a spanking important. Being otk with a bare bottom and/or cornertime, scolding are enough for me as I am a pretty modest person. Some may need to be shamed verbally or physically, but that would be a deal breaker for me. I need to feel cared for and respected at all times.
    4 points
  46. My name is Gary. My wife's name is Jessica. We share this account. She is spanked, and I love spanking her! We are a mixed race couple. I'm white... Scandinavian. She is black... Jamaican & Nigerian
    4 points
  47. Yes, agree! My ER bares my bottom while I’m over his knee and only down mid thigh. I think that activates my headspace more.
    4 points
  48. Girlie need of a spanking and mentor
    4 points
  49. The reasons listed by the original author are all valid ones, and many spankees resonate with one or more of these. They are the justifications of our need for spanking. But WHY we need it? Our hardwiring. Our brain is a mass of neurons and electrical signals, and our needs are hardwired in. This is why you can't get rid of the spanking kink, even when you try to. One can suppress it, for a time, and our focus on it ebbs and flows, based on whatever other needs are requiring our attention. But the actual spanking need always resurfaces because it's essentially a tiny marker on our DNA helix. Ever notice how spankos come from all different backgrounds? Some were spanked as children; while others never were. We also each bring unique perspectives on how it should be done, what we get out of it, and whether or not it's part of our sexual makeup or completely separate from it. We don't share a common background or past experience that causes this. So in the argument between nature vs nurture, nature wins out.
    4 points
  50. Considering becoming a mini Jillian Keenan and educating spankees on how to have a safe and consensual dynamic. Fake and egotistical Tops, beware 😈
    4 points
×
×
  • Create New...
Search In
  • More options...
Find results that contain...
Find results in...

Write what you are looking for and press enter or click the search icon to begin your search