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Showing content with the highest reputation on 09/03/21 in all areas

  1. We all love OTK, of course; but, how about OTF? Over-the-furniture spanking is versatile and exciting to me - with the couch / sofa being my favorite choice of furniture. What is your favorite position on a couch? • OTK • Laying Down • Over the Arm • Over the Back • Kneeling on the Cushion • Kneeling on the Floor • Something Else Yesterday I was able to use a position that I have rarely experienced: kneeling on the couch cushion, facing the back with arms over it, bottom out. And I loved it. *Image from RLS.
    3 points
  2. Traditional discipline was only introduced at home when I was a teen. It made life simpler and easier, and the cycle of offence-cane-forgiveness was so much kinder than unceasing maternal nagging. I disliked the cane (it stung, a lot!) but even at 14 I actually appreciated the benefits. In the last few years the cane (used by my mentor for purely punishment or discipline... I don't find it titillating) has helped me, inter alia: -to control my urge to speed or drive too 'sharply' -to deal with my forgetfulness at taking medication -to deal with a weight problem. It is not perfect and I do still mess up....and recieve the appropriate stripes as a result. But it has helped ENORMOUSLY. It also helps me process the guilt: for me the sting of conscience is greater than the sting of rattan, but a few moments discomfort from the rattan offsets a few weeks of discomfort from guilt.
    2 points
  3. my Husband had me “out” my spankings and other details of our Dom/sub to His gay Asian friends.
    1 point
  4. 1 point
  5. @rubyreddYeah, being dyslexic I make tons of spelling mistakes, just happy most people get the meaning because it does seem better to keep the flow going. Especially if you have a good scene going.
    1 point
  6. Dre....I love what you said....it had more tomdo with being loved and loving myself than the actual spanking.....I think that is true with me also to a great extent. I am certainly far less reckless and far less self destructive.....and his belt has helped me develop more productive behavior patterns....but still a work in process of course...but so much better in thatvrealm than 14 years ago.
    1 point
  7. Hi Karen, from one spankee to another, welcome! I know the feeling of not being able to share in real life. I have found this place to be nice!
    1 point
  8. I tend to correct as I go - for typos. But, if my RP partner misspells a word, I don't care; it doesn't affect the scene. My point there is dont go back and correct if already posted and errors don't increase your anxiety... mainly because it does slow down the scene.
    1 point
  9. Update: I actually got really red yesterday! Whoo! But also ow... 😭
    1 point
  10. No, Hubbs hasn't even thought of trying this... But I wouldn't mind playing it out!
    1 point
  11. oh my that is a great psychological technique! I dont use a belt with huge force, but I do enjoy the cracking sound it makes when you bend it in half and tightly jerk the ends away from each other to give that deliciously sounding "CRACK"... if the spanking/belting was going to happen latter that night, I might leave it laying in a very conspicuous place (like the kitchen or dining room table) where she might see it throughout the day or at least when leaving in the morning and coming back in the evening... and if no one else was around, I'd be sure to CRACK it as soon as I got home... that sure got the Pavlov's dog-like reaction of immediate butterflies and nerves crashing through stomach, and the little hairs on the back of her neck to stand straight up!
    1 point
  12. My disciplinarian and a few friends here. NOBODY else!!!
    1 point
  13. My husband likes to deal with punishments immediately, but often due to real life getting in the way I often have to wait for it. That anticipation is the worst. I don’t get a physical reminder by wearing the implement or anything, but my thoughts go haywire the whole day and I struggle to focus on the things that need to get done. By the time the spanking finally happens, I am pretty much undone and it doesn’t take long for the tears to come. It is almost like a relief then, that it is finally dealt with. The tears don’t make the spanking shorter per se though unfortunately.
    1 point
  14. I think that the spankings my husband gives me, have helped me realize that he cares about how I treat myself and care about myself. I could be quite careless regarding sleep and would work the night away to please others and help others out. I learned that having boundaries is not a bad thing at all. Knowing how much he cares and he makes that painfully clear, has made less reckless too. Speeding used to be my standard when driving and a few sessions with the bath brush really drove the lesson home. I think the deeper reason I am changing has more to do with being loved and loving myself, than the actual spanking, but it was definitely a tool that helped and still helps. It cuts through overwhelming emotions and distressing thoughts quite clearly and gets to the bottom of things (pun intended).
    1 point
  15. Agreed. When it comes to fun or role play, a choice seems fun! But for discipline or punishment, I want him to be unyielding and firm in his approach.
    1 point
  16. You really need to discuss this before you guys decide to be exclusive. It could be a deal breaker for him and he needs to know... Not telling him would be a lie. Reverse the roles and think about when you would want him to tell you. I'm not saying tell him right now, but think it over carefully because you don't want a relationship that starts with lying
    1 point
  17. I agree @CaliSpanker53. Hey @rubyredd this ones for you 😉.
    1 point
  18. Well @rubyredd Since I know it won't be from YOU..I'm feeling pretty safe...now as far as your safety...
    1 point
  19. I find one of the best goals in a good role play is the try to renew in the spankee the feelings about spankings and discipline as when it was new to them. The nervous energy, embarrassment, excitement, and fun. Becoming new characters, in new settings, trying different punishments, and even different dynamics. Different scenes can lead to varying levels of authority over a spankee, from a slight dominance in a new couple role play, to absolute in other types of roleplay. Exploring can help keep it from being simply an urge or a need to very exciting. Roleplaying can also be a good method of learning new ideas from others. When in play, myself or others tend to be much more willing to reveal more hidden or embarrassing desires. Expanding horizons in spanking can keep it fresh and interesting and help you understand fetishes or desires you may have dismissed in the past.
    1 point
  20. An immediate spanking teaches the best lesson but is often not practical, so it is made clear to me that I am going to get spanked later for what I did. The anxiety of waiting is then part of my punishment. I don't really need any reminder like your husband's belt trick to keep me mindful of the spanking I'm going to get! Often I have difficulty thinking of anything else and can't keep my mind on what I'm doing. Usually I will be spanked as soon as we have the house to ourselves, and if she is out or busy but no one else is home, her big paddle will come out of the bedroom drawer and be left on the kitchen table or in the living room for me to see. Then she'll come home with groceries and as soon as I've helped put them away, she'll sit on a kitchen chair and pull down my pants, or she'll finish whatever she's doing and sit on the living room couch to spank me. When I see that paddle I know I'll be spanked as soon as she's ready!
    1 point
  21. Cat...that is wonderful. Yes..I did cutting myself too...and my Husbands belt was a huge factor in me stopping hurting myself and accepting the discipline from his strong hand and love....really was life changing for me. Glad you are growing. I came to see cutting as the self abuse it is...and the destructivecwaybto deal with my shortcomings. Bless you Cat...and thanks for sharing this very personal thing...as well as the ptsd.
    1 point
  22. I'd have to say my ability to feel and deal with emotions. Due to ptsd, I spent a good chunk of my life "shutting down", and was a wound up ball of tension, locked up in a box. I never felt like I could truly be vulnerable and allow myself to cry, and let go, and just didn't know how to deal with my own self. My first spanking as an adult, let loose the floodgates, and it allowed me to cry and let go, and feel "safe" to do so... When my ptsd and anxiety were at their worst, during my 1st marriage, my husband would usually be able to sense me shutting down, or going into some kind of "mode" and picked up pretty quickly that a spanking would always help. If I felt out of control, if I felt scared, if I felt beside myself and unsure how to calm down.... A spanking was always the one "safe" thing that allowed me to cry out all of the feels... and I'd always feel more calm and controlled after, which helped me realize that things were still okay. All was well. And cutting. It was spanking that actually broke me of that habit. Not only due to the spankings I would receive afterward leaving quite the impression on me... But the fact spanking also served as a healthier alternative. I learned it was a lot better to ask for a spanking, to help me cry out all of the emotions that would build up and lead to cutting, before it got to that point. With the help of spanking, I was able to find better alternatives and ways to cope. Of course I did have therapy during all of this time, and was seeking professional help and had built up quite the support system... But behind the scenes, I think spanking was making a huge difference. And on a final note, I'd have to say my ability to move forward and "adult" in general... due to ptsd that I had struggled with for years, I felt "stuck" in childhood, and felt like I Couldn't move forward from that point, and spanking and discipline provided the structure I needed, to feel "safe" enough to actually learn, and take steps forward... I didn't always have that... Fight, flight or freeze... I was a freezer, and I felt frozen for many years.
    1 point
  23. I've learned that with some women it works really well. I often require a confession while kneeling and restrained at wrists and ankles, sometimes I strip her naked first, other times I pull down her pants and underpants to expose her after I restrain her wrists to each other and then add about a foot or so of chain or rope from that to a dog collar around her neck. Having her hands limited to being out in front of her face like that allows things to be placed in her hands so she can clearly see them. When it's a new implement that has not been used previously, or one that she doesn't like because she knows it hurts, that makes it all the more effective. Since I nearly always already know why she is being disciplined, requiring a confession before the spanking greatly enhances the overall experience by making her admit guilt and ask to be punished over what has taken place. But I will sometimes also do a punishment session upon request and not always be told why she's asking for one until the actual confession starts.
    1 point
  24. I have always been a spanko and next May marks the 30th Spankoversary of my first swats. My longest spanking relationship is with my husband (14 years) - he is a Top. I also had a spanking friend I have known for almost 20 years.
    1 point
  25. That is amazing shy! You have lots to bring to the table for all of us. Since you are a woman and submissive and spankee...I am sure you and I have many things in common....I am both as well. In my case....it is all within the context of marriage and my experience is thus far limited to just my experience with Husband Sir....but I hope he will keep me around...lol....until we grow old together. Although he is not easy on me by any means....he is good on me...lol....and he is a good man and loves me even when giving me even the most harsh discipline or the gentlest loving. Not sure of the context in your relationships for this...but I will always appreciate and value your adds to my life I am sure.....
    1 point
  26. I've been in this lifestyle for 33 years, but in my current relationship as a spankee and submissive...it's been 10 years.
    1 point
  27. Oh my Goddddd....spankings make me so incredibly horny I sometimes get overwhelmed. Seriously. Ever since I was a child, after being spanked by my parents, I would ALWAYS rub down "there" or hump my stuffed animals or pillow until I would feel everything just release. I didn't know what I was doing then, but when I did it, I thought about being spanked. To this day there is nothing that turns me on more than the thought, the conversation or the act of a spanking!
    1 point
  28. breathing makes men horny.
    1 point
  29. I agree with this...however depending on who I'm playing with...going back into main and pulling them back to pm...can be fun. Are you listening @rubyredd ?
    0 points
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