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  1. 10 points
    “Please! I’m sorry, I won’t do it again!” Emma pleaded as Mark led her back in the house with a firm grasp on her upper arm. “I’m gonna make sure of it!” Mark said sternly. They had been outside working in the yard of their newly built home when Emma had earned herself a spanking. While she was submissive to her husband, she always found it hard to hold her tongue when he wasn’t doing things the way she thought they should be done. She’d been spanked for nagging and nitpicking many times before. This time Mark was fed up. He was determined to teach his wife a lesson. “I’m done with the criticism!” Mark said loudly as he stood up from the flower bed and clapped the mulch off his gloves. He looked at Emma in the way he always did when she had earned herself a spanking. His face waswas serious and stern, a complete 180 of the laid back and funny man she was so accustomed to. “You’re going to go pick me a good switch so we can fix this bad habit of yours and you know what I mean by a good one!” he demanded as he pointed to the woodline beside their yard. Emma’s brown eyes widened and she covered her mouth in shock at the statement. Then her brow furrowed with defiance and she got defensive. “I’m just trying to help! You’re doing it wrong!... and I’m not doing that! I did nothing wrong!” she hollered, crossing her arms and standing her ground. Her mind raced knowing he never usually uses such a harsh tone with her, let alone asked her to pick a switch. She didn’t feel she was in the wrong. But, this wasn’t the first time her mouth had gotten her in trouble. Mark had to remind her often that she was not the boss in their relationship and it had become a common theme. Mark’s face was angry as he took his gloves off and walked towards his wife. He decided he would just teach her what her refusal and back talk would result in. Knowing she’d crossed the line, Emma shrank with fear and took a step back. His non nonsense demeanor and the way he took hold of her arm was enough to make Emma regret her defiant attitude and wish she had picked the switch like she was told. “You will pick one after I spank for disobeying me then, young lady. I’ve had enough!” he said as he marched her towards the house. Emma’s stomach was in knots as they quickly approached the bedroom. She had so much to say, but it was all happening too fast. He took a seat at the foot of their bed and forcefully turned her over his knee. Without missing a beat, he began spanking her hard and fast. She shrieked and instinctively reached her hand behind her in an attempt to protect her bottom which was already stinging. Mark took hold of her wrist and pinned it in the small of her back and began spanking even harder. After about a minute, he stood her up in front of him. Emma’s face was flushed and she sighed heavily, tucking her long dark hair behind her ears and covering her face in embarrassment. She knew he was about to take her shorts and panties down, and she dreaded this part. “Uncover your face, Emma” Mark said sternly. She did so immediately, and he took her hands in his. “Look at me when I’m talking to you. This is for you being disobedient and defiant. We will address the criticism and disrespect next.” Emma’s eyes widened and she stuttered to respond, but was quickly interrupted. “The only appropriate response is “yes, Sir” and for you to do as you’re told.” he said, still holding both her hands. He gave them a comforting squeeze and instructed her to go get the hairbrush. Emma fought the urge to talk back, apologize, or otherwise try to explain her behavior. She went into their bathroom and grabbed the heavy wooden hairbrush. Any defiance had already left her and she quickly returned and handed the brush to her husband. Placing it on the bed beside him, he ordered Emma to stand in front of him. He didn’t waste any time unbuttoning her shorts and tugging both her pants and panties down. “Please” she whispered, her face clear with remorse. She was embarrassed and never knew what to do with her hands when he was baring her bottom. Mark pulled her over his knee again and tapped the heavy hair brush against her already red bottom and began to lecture. “When I tell you to do something, I expect you to do it. Especially when it comes to your discipline. Your refusal to pick a switch is going to cost you big time. I suggest you keep position and don’t fight me while I blister your bottom to teach this lesson, or I’ll make things worse for you.” Emma clenched her cheeks and shifted her weight on his lap in anticipation and angst. She let out a small cry followed by a “yes sir” while looking at the carpet and bracing herself with both arms. “I’m sorry!” she bellowed loudly as she felt the heavy sting of the brush. Mark never enjoyed punishing his wife, but discipline worked for both of them and he was set on making an impression. He spanked her hard and thoroughly with the brush, covering every inch of her bottom. She closed her eyes tightly as she struggled to keep position. The fire was building fast in her bottom and her legs naturally began to kick. Breathing hard and fast, “I’m sorry! I won’t do it again” she cried out again, her voice panicked and desperate. Mark paused and examined his wife’s now crimson bottom. The hairbrush was certainly having the effect he desired. “What are you not going to do again?” He asked while rubbing her bottom. Emma was relieved at the pause, “I’ll do as I'm told!” she promised emphatically. Mark brought the brush down with a vengeance on her right sit spot and she shrieked. “I’m going to make sure of it! We’ve been through this too many times, Emma” Her eyes filled with tears and her body collapsed with disappointment and regret at his response. Mark again began to rain down more spanks on her now crimson bottom. The tears finally began to fall from Emma’s eyes as she kicked and writhed over his firm lap. A few minutes later, he finally stopped. “You did good, Emma. I’m proud of you” he said genuinely while rubbing her scorched bottom. “Thank you, I really am sorry” she said, choking back tears. He stood her up and sat her on his lap. “I know you are, Love” he said reassuringly. He held her tightly as she wiped her eyes and composed herself. After a few moments of quiet and consoling Emma broke the silence. “I don’t think I can take anymore tonight. I promise I learned my lesson. I want to be a good girl for you” she said to him with pleading eyes and her arms around his neck. Mark sighed. He was thinking the same thing, at least about not knowing if she could take anymore. He could feel the heat radiating from her pretty bottom through his jeans. He was silent for a moment while he came to terms with the fact he’d have to follow through if he was going to fix the behavior that had brought them to this same place many times over. “This isn’t easy for either of us” he explained compastionaly, “but we have to address the criticism and disrespect that lead up to all of this..” Emma sat up straight on his lap and interjected “Please! Not today!” Her voice panicked. Mark placed his finger over her mouth and rubbed her bottom. His voice was calm but matter of fact, “You’re going to go pick the switch, just like I told you to do earlier as soon as I’m done talking. Then, after dinner we’re coming right back in here so we can put this issue to bed, do you understand?” Emma was worried, and immediately, without thinking, jumped right back into her critical nature. “No! I can’t take anymore, Mark. You don’t even believe that I’m sorry. It would be better to do it tomorrow!” she insisted. Mark knew by her response that he had to address the issue now. “You’re already telling me what I should do and critiquing my instructions” he said firmly as he stood her up. Emma’s heart sank. She hadn’t realized what she said, things just slipped out sometimes. “No! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it like that” she said desperately. “It doesn’t matter what you mean it like, Emma! It’s got to stop, and it’s my duty as your husband to correct these toxic behaviors that are causing us issues.” He placed both hands on her shoulders and told her to look at him while he explained that she was getting a switching right now and that if she didn’t pick a good one, he’d be picking one for her and they’d repeat the process tomorrow until she was compliant, respectfu,l and learned to think before she allowed nagging, nitpicking, or otherwise critical words to spew from her mouth towards him. Emma’s eyes again welled with tears as she listened attentively to her husband. She felt terrible and knew she had to do better. Clutching her still throbbing bottom, she nodded in agreement. After slipping back into her panties and shorts, she headed outside to find the switch, regretting she had not done so the first time. Mark watched her from the yard. The more he thought about had led to this moment, the more confident he was with his decision. “I’m going to wear her bottom out” he thought to himself as he watched his wife pace the woodline in search of a proper switch. Emma finally found the one, it was about the diameter of her pinky and just long enough to swing comfortably. She was embarrassed as she walked back towards the house with it. “Why do you always do this to yourself, Emma?!” She said to herself, shaking her head but not at all surprised by her behavior. She saw Mark waiting for her at the bottom of the porch steps with his arms crossed watching her. She waved the switch in an attempt of humor as she got closer. “I think you’re gonna be happy with this one!” She called out, smiling. Mark returned her smile and only responded with “you better hope so.” He swatted her butt as he followed her up the steps and into the house. The break and searching had allowed Emma’s head to clear and her demeanor was more accepting and submissive. She placed the switch on their bed and turned towards her husband. “I know I deserve this and I’m disappointed in me too. I want to be good for you, but I can’t help my words sometimes.” she explained softly. Mark knew she was sincere, he stroked her hair and nodded in agreement. “Take off all your clothes and get on all fours at the end of the bed.” “Yes Sir” Emma winced, and began to undress. Mark lectured her on why it was so necessary to correct her behavior and reiterated that if she kept it up, he’d take things even further the next time. Emma positioned herself just like Mark had told her, she made sure her knees were wider than she was comfortable with, to err on the side of caution. Her headspace was surprisingly on point. She felt submissive, though nervous and embarrassed knowing he was standing behind her with her most feared implement. She focused on her breathing, preparing herself to take the punishment she knew she deserved. “I want you to stay in position, do you understand me?” Mark's voice was a comfort to her at this point. “Yes Sir” she promptly replied. “SWISH, CRACK” The first strike landed on her already sore and bruising bottom and she cried out in pain. The switch stung like a razor blade slicing into her skin. She cried hard, struggling to repeat how sorry she was. Surprisingly and despite the pain, she managed to stay on all fours, though her hips were all over the place. Mark continued the switching until her bottom cheeks were criss crossed with welts and she was gripping their bedsheets in agony. Finally, he dropped the switch on the floor. Emma continued crying and held her position, trying to pull herself together. Mark carefully examined her swollen, tender bottom, spreading her ample cheeks and noting that she would not be sitting comfortably for days. Finally satisfied with his work and her demeanor, he tapped her bottom lightly to indicate her punishment was over. “Come sit with me” he said, helping her up into his lap. Emma cried even harder knowing it was all over. Most times, she found it hard to cry during her spankings, but this lesson was cathartic. She held tightly to her husband as he lovingly reassured her all was forgiven. The End *My first real attempt at writing, any feedback or constructive criticism is greatly appreciated
  2. 6 points
    Require the spankee to maintain eye contact with you during the lecture. End the discussion with something like, "Do you know what's about to happen to you? Why don't you tell me....." Make sure he/she uses the "s" word. It is painfully embarrassing for the spankee to have to look you in the eyes and utter, "You're going to give me a spanking."
  3. 6 points
    May 5, 2020 Dear Friends, I'm taking a hiatus from SN to devote my energy to something else that is requiring my focus. I will check in here and there, but not as frequently as I normally do. Will miss you guys while I'm gone. Y'all are the best! Chawsee
  4. 5 points
    Such a good question! Of course my answer is complex. Others have made good points above, too. Like all things spanking, it depends on the individual. For me, it’s all about the real. I’ve been intrigued/obsessed with spanking in a discipline context for as long as I can remember. I enjoy the physical and emotional aspects of spanking on many levels, but crave the “truly sorry, punished“ feeling. Since I enjoy spanking, it has to be hard enough and real enough for me to truly learn a lesson (that can get dark) which is not easily achieved. A full force punishment is awful in the moment. It's the after effects that make it desirable - the headspace you’re in after it’s all over, sincerely wanting and motivated to be better, being vulnerable to the one who cares enough about you to push just past your barriers to make it real. And of course, “a real spanking doesn’t begin until you want it to stop” rings true.
  5. 5 points
    It started so nicely. She had made herself comfortable on her bed, then patted her lap for me to lay across. On the other side of the her were a plethora of her ‘toys’. Everything from the mild wooden spoons, to the serious leather straps and paddles, to some bamboo switches. But I wasn’t in trouble and this was just supposed to be a nice, casual, slightly stingy, bedtime spanking. I laid across her lap, grabbed a pillow for my head and perked up my backside, wiggling it a little. This made her laugh, and she gave me a couple playful swats. “Ow” I protested. “Ow, indeed”. She knew better. She started out with a steady stream of swats, left to right, covering my entire backside, happily humming along with the swats. Soon after, she lowered my PJ’s and continued with her steady stream of slaps, slightly harder but still easily bearable. Finally, down went the last of my protection. I pretended to protest again, she just laughed. “Now on the bare!” she said cheerfully, and resumed my spanking. I twisted ever so slightly from side to side with each swat, noting the increased stinging. Like most Spankers, she liked seeing a reaction in her charges. Then, she tapped my shoulder and said, “Hand me that wooden spoon”. I did as I was told, handing her the spoon. The swats were stingy, and I was rotating from side to side after each. She giggled. A few rapid fire swats and she set it down, tapping my shoulder again. “Now that one” pointing to a large paddle. I paused “Which one?” reaching for a smaller one. “No, the one next to it”. I instinctively pulled my hand away. She noted my hesitancy. Trying to be patient with me, she repeated, “Young lady, I said hand me that paddle”, her voice stern, but I didn’t move. My second refusal triggered her, and just like that, it had become a test of wills. Her voice had changed from light, cheery and playful, to serious and a little scary. “Did you hear what I said?” she asked. Part of me thought ‘just reach over and hand her that stupid paddle’, but I didn’t want a hard spanking. So, instead of grabbing it and handing it to her, I whined, kicking my feet in protest. Her arm around my waist tightened and I felt her take a deep breath in and release it. Up until now, it had been, a nice, easy, playful spanking. However, the paddle she pointed to wasn’t any of those things. It was long and frightening, with holes! Not something used for a good girl spanking. ‘Me and my stupid, stubborn streak’, I thought to myself, ‘all you had to do was reach out and hand it to her, and she probably would’ve gone easy’. “Last chance. Reach over and hand me that paddle. Now!’’. I let out a whine, knowing that I was now in trouble, my playful spanking gone and that paddle in my near future. “Okay, if that’s the way you want it!” her tone determined. I felt her reach for her bedside table where she kept her hairbrush. “No!” I cried, reaching for the paddle, trying to hand it to her. “Too late now young lady, but you can hold on to that, because I will be using it after I’m done with this”, feeling the hairbrush against my skin. “Remember, this was your choice” and she unleashed her hairbrush on my poor bottom, without even a warm-up. She didn’t switch from side to side, but struck the same spot quickly and repeatedly. I tried everything I could to escape that brush, but she held me in place easily. It felt like an eternity before she stopped, leaving me gasping for air. “Well, that side is done, one more to go”. “What? No! no more! Please, I learned my lesson” I protested, positive I couldn’t endure another round like that. She wasn’t finished though, and my pleas fell on deaf ears. She repositioned me slightly for better access and started again, same speed, same intensity. I grit my teeth and buried my face in the bed, trying to accept my punishment. When she finished, my backside was throbbing. “Looks like you’re getting one heck of a bedtime spanking young lady” setting down the hairbrush and tapping my shoulder. “I’ll take that paddle now”. What could I do? I reached over and handed her the paddle. “I’m sorry” trying to get some leniency. “Oh, you will be” tightening her grip around my waist and landing the first swat. A sharp pain radiated throughout my entire rear end and I jolted up, yelping loudly. “Yeah, I bet you’re wishing you had listened now, don’t you?” I nodded, unable to speak. “Five more”. Another swat landed as hard as the first. I cried out into my pillow. She gave me a moment, watching my reaction, gave a couple warning taps then, WHACK! My head popped up and my hands reflexively tried to cover my poor buttocks. She caught my hand, pinning it to my side. “Now, now” she said with concern, “we don’t want your hand getting in the way. No broken fingers”. “Sorry” I muttered. “I understand, I know this is hard to take”. She let go of my wrist and I returned my hand above my head. “Three more. Ready?” I nodded, bracing myself and burying my head in the pillow. The fourth strike resonated throughout my body. I screamed into the pillow, gripping it tight. “The last two will be quick. Brace yourself” then two more instant swats, not as strong as the first four, but with enough force to make the point. She put the paddle down next to her hairbrush and gave me a moment to compose myself. “What do you have to say for yourself, young lady?”. I raised my head up and looked at her. Her face was stern, but kind. “I’m sorry I didn’t listen” I replied, tears in my eyes. “I bet you are. And I’m afraid you’re going to be sorrier because I plan on making sure that stubborn streak of yours is gone” giving me a strict look. “You’re going to hand me every single one of those implements” pointing to the pile on the bed. My eyes got huge as I turned to see the dozen or so of her toys. “No. please. I learned my lesson”. “Well, we’ll see, won’t we” tapping me on the shoulder “Hand me one of those straps”. My shoulders dropped, but I didn’t hesitate, knowing it would only make things worse. I reached over and handed her a strap. “Good girl” she replied. She continued like that until I had handed her all of the implements, including the bamboo switches. When she had finished with the last one, my bottom was on fire and I knew I would be belly sleeping tonight. She replaced my clothing, letting my breathing settle, then pulled me up into her arms. “All over” she said, cuddling me. Sensing the ‘all clear’ her S.O. came in. “That was one heck of a bedtime spanking. Sounded like someone’s going to sleep good tonight” giving me a gentle smile. “We had a bit of a setback, but it’s all over now” she replied, still holding me. “I’m sorry” I whispered. “I know you are” she replied kindly, giving me a squeeze. I rested my head on her chest, determined to do better and not let my stubbornness cause me anymore trouble
  6. 5 points
    I have been spanked in this position and it's one that appeals to me for several reasons. I like that I have eye contact with my spanker and that I can see it coming. It feels much more personal to me. It's also a humbling position as you're very exposed and I feel the force of every spank. It leaves quite an impression :).
  7. 5 points
    White cotton panties all the way
  8. 4 points
    I've always ordered the spankee to remove his underwear himself, but this weekend I administered a spanking in which I pulled down his underwear. This was done authoritatively but respectfully, maintaining eye contact with him to prevent him from feeling any more uncomfortable than necessary. So I have officially done it both ways. Either works. The spankee doing it himself signifies submission and acceptance of the spanking, while having it done for him intensifies his sense of helplessness and surrender. If you are the spankee, your spanker should listen to, and take into consideration, any preferences you may have. If you're the spanker, I'd say follow your instincts on whichever feels right at the time. As a switch who has also been spanked umpteen times, I would suggest being a little more careful with female spankees. We tend to feel violated more easily than do men. So a spanker who's contentious of this is appreciated.
  9. 4 points
    I think this would go off better on FetLife. this is not a singles market.
  10. 4 points
    Have you read The story of O? There’s a place in it where O is musing that she craves whipping until she knows it’s coming. Then, after it starts, she will beg, scream, plead and promise anything to get it to stop. The moment it stops, she would do anything to get it to start again. I think the split is part of spanking for lots of people. I crave a spanking much of the time. I drop hints that I want to be really severe. But when I think she’s getting ready to do it, I start trying to distract her and start trying to put it off, and I will even ask her to start easy. I am extremely disappointed when she does. I want her in total charge and I want it to hurt from the very beginning. I feel like a wimp when I have convinced her to go easy. I hate myself afterwards. I could probably get her to start again if I told her she stopped too soon, but I know what that would mean. She would be mad and I would feel it for days. It’s really what I want, but I won’t ask for it. I get it sometimes.
  11. 4 points
    Superbly said, michgal! A man crying over my lap is about the most bonding thing in the world for me.
  12. 4 points
    Don't believe#9. Happy mother's Day 😘
  13. 4 points
    Few things are more sobering and humbling than when someone bares your bottom for a disciplinary punishment and you are holding the implement that is about to get used on you.
  14. 4 points
    I am not 100 percent against writing lines. Lines do have the repetition, so the person rethinks the behavior. Over time, I saw essays were more beneficial. For example, writing a 500 word essay about the dangers of texting and driving (providing statistics and actual facts of accident/death info) may teach someone more than writing “I will not text and drive “1000 times. Everyone learns differently, so that has to be kept in mind also. On a side note, I have used corner time a lot, but see no need that the person must be completely naked in the corner, unless it’s erotic spanking. Just my opinion.
  15. 3 points
    I think that's more of a complicated situation and I hope you two figure something out where you both are happy. It takes two to agree to an open relationship; which at this point she admits it might turn into. If you feel this is the only compromise to save your marriage it's kinda twisting your hands. I do feel it's slightly unfair for her to (although at least honest); to say things might go romantic and she'd not commit to cutting them off. That isn't going to be stable or healthy in the long run if your always feeling on edge that she might leave you. Which is a position she is putting you in. Please keep us updated and she's also more than welcomed to create an account here too. Especially if she's trying to figure out things. It might help her get over some resentment talking to other EE's that have more vanilla like partners.
  16. 3 points
    Lol, love the 'used car salesman' line. Very accurate. For me, making me talk every so often, (simple yes/ no answers), forces me to use a part of my brain that I also use to block out the spankings, which I will start to do. It's a way to keep me from 'drifting off'. But, to each their own
  17. 3 points
    Me after my 'stubborn brat' session yesterday. Except, I'm pretty sure I kicked off my pants and shoes during my 'lesson'. Bottom looks about right though. 🔥
  18. 3 points
    Hi TryingHusband, First of all I want to acknowledge you for the fact that you were and still are open to the spanking needs of your wife. This doesn't happen very often in relationships that started "vanilla" (the term for couples that have no kinky things in their relationship). I don't know how you "completely blew it", but I am very certain, reading your story, that this was definitely not intentional to do that. Please don't blame yourself too much. Especially beginners make a lot of mistakes, both the spanker and spankee do, this is normal. We don't live in the ideal world, where we get everything instantly, it is a learning process you see. And you should be compassionate about yourself. So should your wife... Of course it can be painful if things go wrong, but I guess she should do a little more effort to understand that you never ever meant to break her trust (assuming that is the situation). Of course I don't say this to blame your wife, but what I think is missing here is compassion. You for yourself, your wife for you and the both of you for the parts you both "played". I don't know how long ago it was that this all happened. I know as a woman that when such a thing happens, it takes time to recover, depending on the severity of the "incident". The best thing you can do for her is respect that and give her time (unless it was like more than a year ago or so). And tell her that you completely understand her pain. She want to go on with her spanking needs and that requires some compassion from your side of the medal so to speak. The person(s) spanking her will never be a replacement of you, never ever. And I read in between the lines that what she, besides her need to be spanked, silently asks you: "Please trust me on this". I think you should try to find a way to get over your jealousy, maybe you could meet the people that she knows and wants to join in spanking fun and talk to him/her/them? Would that help? I also understand it that you have a hard time with this, for sure! But in the end it all comes to trust. She can't trust you right now when it comes to spanking, but these wounds will heal. And who knows: maybe the people she's involved with right now can learn her things which she can tell you about, in time you might start over again and build it up, learn about the right ways to do it and work on trust and safety along the way. Keep on talking to her and step out of the jealous mindset. Tell her you love her more than anything else in the world and you trust her. What would be reasonable is that you 2 keep communicating about her spanking experiences. So show her you're interested, show her you're a safe person and interested person to share it with. Show her respect and trust. If you want her to trust you, you will have to trust her, so take that first step if you feel up to it. Thank you for sharing and trusting us. I hope this helps! Anja
  19. 3 points
    Good point, John. As some of you know, I hired a certified life coach to work with me this month as a way to improve my own mentoring. He was the first non-spanko to whom I came out recently about my spanking fetish. This was hard to do, but he handled it exceptionally well and encouraged me to continue. (He is openly gay, so he knows of what he speaks when it comes to "coming out.") He said, "Be open and honest about who you are, and do so WITHOUT coloring it with shame or embarrassment, because then you're inadvertently teaching people how to perceive it." That was sound advice. I still err on the side of caution and do not feel safe opening up about this publicly, other than to a second individual, a local guy I just told who was pursuing a relationship with me. Thankfully, though, the tides are turning, with spanking becoming more mainstream in books and movies. I do want to gradually tell a few more people who are close to me (but in a light-hearted, fun way... next time.)
  20. 3 points
    This is not a discussion allowed on SN. Spanking of minors is not something we debate about. Spanking Needs Site Rules & Guidelines Minors and Children 
  21. 3 points
    I provide motherly guidance and discipline. I am safe and sane. I am fair but strict. This is strictly Non sexual for me. Only those who are serious please.
  22. 3 points
    Back to the original post. Anytime a spankee wants to walk away from a session for any reason, she should be able to. That's absolute. I don't care if she's given her spanker complete control or whatever term is used these days. She should get up and walk away, and there should be no trouble from the spanker. He has the right, of course, not to deal with her in the future if he so wants. But it's real, there's no question about that.
  23. 3 points
    Nice depiction of the battle between wills of an ee and ER, with the ee not ready to concede (yet).
  24. 3 points
    Well said! Completely agree. I love switching, whether with the same person or someone else and I don't really care whether someone has a problem with that. In my opinion, as long as everything is 100% consensual, there is no right or wrong when it comes to a spanking relationship. Let people do what works for them!
  25. 3 points
    Hey all, I’m new here. I have a story to share, well more like a novel... if you don’t like books keep scrolling! I’m not sure if this is the proper place to post this, but I feel it is worth a share, if nothing else for everyone here to enjoy as well for myself to come back to and read and reflect. This is a 100% true story, that happened Yesterday, I wrote it out and tried to post unsuccessfully while it was fresh and didn’t have a chance to try again until today. Anyways here goes! I am a long time top, always have been, however I’m not Opposed to being a switch, it’s just never been the case for me. My wife, is relatively new to DD as we’ve been married 4 years come month end, but is very much a bottom. I view our relationship very much as equal DD for both partners, same rules, same Consequences. But if I were to assume how she treats it, it would’ve more of a HoH (head of house) marriage. As she is typically on the receiving end, and I normally hold myself to a higher standard or morality and ethics and actively avoid being in these situations, by trying as I may to be on my best behaviour. My story starts yesterday morning, my alarm went off and I started to get ready for work, but as I rolled over my wife was no where to be found, I went down stairs and found her sound asleep with our baby girl of 9months. So selfishly I thought, normally I use this time and walk our dogs, but this morning seeing the opportunity I thought, “I’ll crawl back into bed and get 15-20more min! Of sleep” and I did just that. When I woke up and went downstairs for coffee my wife was still asleep. When she finally woke she asked me if i was already back from walking the boys. Rather than saying I took a day off or decided to sleep in. I looked her square in the eyes and said, “yes I did” I lied to her. Then I even went as far to say, you must’ve been sleeping so sound that you didn’t hear us! Well As the morning went on I thought I was in the clear. So off for my shower I went. Once out while I was getting ready my wife Confronted me. And she did so very lovingly, and asked “I don’t want to accuse you, but if you took the boys out already, why weren’t the dogs leashes moved, and how come your shoes are in the same place I left them?” As well “I also heard your snooze alarm go off twice this morning” Rather than trying to add more lies, I owned up. I lied. No two ways around it. She was devastated and beyond hurt that I would lie to her. Now to some this might seem insignificant, I just said I walked the dogs, it’s not a big deal you are allowed to take a break once in a while. For us honesty and trust is everything. For a little bit of backstory for anyone whose made it this far, my wife had a awful childhood. And we’ve been going through couples councilling for a few years now dealing with the topics relating to honesty and trust and trying to repair her woundings of the past. So hopefully this paints a small picture of how big of a deal this is for us. To me, I just showed her, that I was not safe place, and was not reliable. In her mind she goes into panic mode and starts thinking along the lines of, If I could lie so easily about such a small thing could I be lying about big things too? Or can he be trusted, will he just betray me again when it really counts? This is how the anxiety eats my wife alive. So anyways, I’m apologizing and desperately trying to make things, right. She says she forgives me, but that’s just because I know she doesn’t want this eating at me all day at work. At about this time I have to leave or I’ll be late. While at work I have plenty of time to go back and fourth in my head on how to make this right. Everything plan, idea, solution i come up with keeps coming round to the same conclusion. I have to be spanked. My wife has said after a spanking she feels there is no lingering guilt, no grudges, and wen it’s done, it’s done. Which is exactly how I want to feel, but more so I want to submit myself to her to show how sorry I truly am. And that I am not above being punished. Fast forward to the end of the day. I get home, and I can see everything is tense and raw still, so I kiss my wife hold my baby girl and go for my shower. After bath and bed time for our daughter I approach my wife. And explain my proposal. She explains that she admires my bravery, and it means a lot that I would do that for her, but she will not spank me, and that She doesn’t want to see me in that position... I persist, and insist she does. But alas she does not budge. The tense feelings continue on for yet another day. So now that we’ve played catch up this brings me to today, I work for a rather large construction outfit. We have about 4-5 different trades and all work together which is very nice! Myself I’m one of the lead journeymen for one of the branches of trades workers. So here I am At work feeling sorry for myself, when my boss asks me to take the crew to our currently vacant office building we’re renovating and work there for the day. The day goes by, and I can’t get out of my head at all. Even to the point of effecting my production, I can’t understand why she won’t spank me, and why she’s convinced that I shouldn’t be in that position, is it my personality? Is it my job title? Is it because I’m her husband? And just like that I see it. A beautiful scrap piece of puckboard (a white plastic like material) Around this time Everyone is leaving for break now and I don’t have much time. So I grab one of the carpenters jigsaws and make two crude but quick cuts. Take out my knife and shave down the edges, I’ve just created my very own paddle, crude, but I’d imagine effective. Then as if ordained by the universe my boss calls and pulls the entire crew less me to a different job. So here I am in an empty office building ridden with guilt and a paddle in hand. Knowing full well my wife would almost certainly prefer me use it on her rather the other way around I had to think of a way to change her mind... Then I remember back to my early days, this office we are renovating used to be the companies hub of operations, and one of the corner offices belonged to one of my old bosses. Her and I have always had a sterling reputation with each other and never had as much as a tiff when I worked for her. But I could never shake the suspicion that she’s bent more than a few people over her desk in her time, and spanked the attitude out of said people. She is one of those people who has a commanding presence about her, one that demands respect, as well as many of the qualities of a disciplinarian I admire. And being woman in construction, which I cant imagine being easy, especially in charge of at times very egotistical men, she does a excellent job at maintaining her unwavering authority. Obviously with that being said I’d be half tempted if she was in the office that day to get her to break in this paddle for me, and I’m sure she’d happily spank my bottom. But sadly I am alone. So what did I do instead? I still marched into her office, moved her items to the side of her desk and dropped my pants. I bent over her old desk and started to spank myself, long and hard with my paddle. I’m convinced when self spanking you take it slightly easier on yourself than if someone else would administer it. And being truly repentant I didn’t want that. So I set a timer, and committed to hard spanking on my bare bottoms for 15minutes. Around what I assume to be the five minute mark, I was shaking, and my knees buckling. I was ready to quit, but I imagined my former boss putting her hand on my back holding me down, paddling my now firery red bottom. The imagery in my head was so strong, I actually felt as if I couldn’t move. That I was small, and powerless, and could not move even if I tried, and the only option was to endure this phantom spanking. Smack after smack landed, harder and harder. Until one hit so hard i buckled. I had to stop for a quick breather. When I looked at my phone only 8minutes had passed! I was only half way there! I paused my timer and desperately tried to rub the fire out of my backside. I remember thinking to myself, I know this is my first spanking and all, but I have to be able to take more than this! My wife takes hers like a champ, and doesn’t start to wriggle and protest until well into hers! Is she really that much tougher than me, it would seem so! After a minute or so of rubbing and soothing I collected myself and bent back over. These last 7 minutes were brutal. But I had to focus on why I was here. I wanted to show my wife the results of my spanking as well present her with the paddle in hopes she would use it on me when she felt appropriate or comfortable to do so. But at the bare minimum, at least spanking myself would show her that I am repentant, and sorry and that my lapse in judgement isn’t something I take lightly, let alone actively want to do again going forward. But also break her from this idea that I somehow was above being spanked for bad behaviour, and to get off the pedestal that she seemingly has me on in her mind. Smack after smack landed, and the final few minutes had me in tears. Not sobbing, but a steady trickle of tears ran down my face and pooled on the large desk I was bent over. After what seemed like an eternity, the alarm went. My spanking was done. Standing up I rubbed my bottom kind of hopping up and down attempting to soothe the burn. In the office is a very large mirror, completely bottomless at this point, I removed the drop sheet it inspect the damage, and what I saw completely shook me. My never reddened previously backside was every shade of red, pock marks or purple and blue speckled across my cheeks as well, my aim was off at times, and did quite the number on my upper thighs. My bottom was throbbing, aching and in so much pain, but the guilt, anxiety, and emotional discomfort was Completely gone. In this moment I began to understand why my wife took to spanking so quickly. And has even requested it at times. The sense of completion at the end of a spanking is unlike anything I’d ever experienced. No more lingering voices whispering negative words in the back of my head no more Doubt, Just calm. I looked at the time, and my workload, pulled up my pants, laced up my boots and got back to work. One thing I did not Consider, is that my job for the day required me to be on my back working under desks, and cabinets, on rigid hard surfaces, shuffling along on none other than my well spanked bottom. I supposed it was a fitting consequence with all things considered. That brings my story to right here right now. I have an hour before my shift is over, and a paddle in my hand. I write this story if you can even call it that, sitting in my old bosses chair, donning a very red, sore and bruised bottom. Eagerly waiting to see my wife’s response when I’m home and show her, even a confident top can be a submissive bottom. That rules are rules, and I’m not above the ones we set for our family, that I love her, and I am truly sorry. Let me know in the comments if you want a pt.2 since this story occurred yesterday there are some updates, and I believe potential to go on to future stories. I am by no means a writer, but this is 100% true, and that alone might be enough to interest people! Again if this is the wrong place to post please take down and Let me know where the proper place is! Thanks for reading!
  26. 3 points
    You put into words exactly how I feel and react in the same scenario. Well said!
  27. 3 points
    I'm back to add another thought.... When I'm on the receiving end, I like to be scolded first, then spanked all the way through, or scolded throughout the spanking but not made to answer. That's probably weird, I know, but having to answer breaks my focus and takes me out of my "zone." Does that make sense?
  28. 3 points
    The belt is best controlled when folded in half (be sure to hang onto the buckle). It's even better when turned inside out, as this causes it to land and "grab" just a little, instead of sliding a bit, as it does when the smooth side of the leather strikes the skin. Also, long belts tend to be unwieldy and inclined to wrap, so I use a short one (too short in length for me to wear, but perfect for spanking). If you already happen to own a longer belt, it can be made more controllable by folding it in half, then folding it in half again-- although this makes it more severe. As for which parts of the butt should get it most... Stay in the fleshy area. Be extra careful to avoid anything above the gluteal cleft (kidney region), the tailbone, and the hip bones. I, personally, avoid the thighs, too. They're more easily damaged.
  29. 3 points
    Unless your vanilla partner is either willing to let you get most of your intimacy elsewhere, or is EXTREMELY enthusiastic about learning (and ultimately is not really vanilla in the end), it will not work. Spare yourself the heartache and find someone compatible.
  30. 3 points
    A close friend of mine casually brought it up. I was venting about how my life was taking a bit of a downward spiral at the time and he said something like " Maybe you need a spanking". He meant it in a completely casual/whimsical way, but i was taken aback and was quiet for a while.
  31. 3 points
    Contributing as a spankee. To me, the outfit makes the mood. I prefer to wear pants and panties when I am spanked. The ritual of having them pulled down and the removal of something that protects me and my modesty is one of the most embarrassing aspects of the spanking, which I hate in the moment but a spanking doesn't feel complete without. Absolutely have a love/hate relationship with my pants and panties being left around my knees and being marched to the corner in shame afterwards. Pajama spankings give a different vibe. To me they often mean a double punishment for me - I was spanked earlier and now I'm going to be spanked before bed on an already sore bottom, and this time with no panties to protect me a little longer. Thongs don't make me feel like a naughty little girl in trouble so I rarely wear them.
  32. 3 points
    I don’t believe children should know at about the lifestyle choice and should never / see or hear it.
  33. 3 points
    (The following mostly only applies to folks who have intense, deep-seated needs related to spanking. If you just like a few love pats in the bedroom now and then, no one is out to get you. So don’t worry.) I am relatively out about my fascination with spanking, but for a variety of reasons, the potential consequences of exposure are comparatively slight for me. I am 100% a spankee rather than a spanker, and am therefore supposedly some kind of sick victim instead of some kind of sick predator. I am also not somebody—particularly not a cis male somebody—-whose livelihood or personal happiness revolves around being perceived as worthy to be a caregiver to children. For reasons probably rooted in a tendency to view children and females of any age as the “property” of their adult male relatives, nearly all marginalized groups have been stereotyped as “thieves of virtue” to one extent or another. As in, “Those [slurs] are gonna come and steal our womenfolk!” “Steal” in this context could mean “carry off so that they are never seen again.” It could also mean, “sexually defile in such a way that the taken property loses its value.” I’m sure you’ve seen it in fiction with old-timey settings: “Alack! Sweet Mary Jane has been ravished by a cad! She shall never catch herself a husband now!” Some of the old-time villainous stock characters seem ridiculous to us now. Nobody really thinks Italians or Irishmen or Catholics or the French or the Germans are going to swarm up out of the bars and gutters and abduct the town’s women. But people used to believe it. Ever see the WWI-era anti-German propaganda poster that slapped a German army helmet on King Kong and showed him carrying a fainting fair-haired maiden out to sea? It says, “Destroy This Mad Brute! Enlist!” on it. If you don’t know it, Google that baby. That’s “the Germans.” Angela Merckel and Boris Becker, beasts that they are, coming to bring our ladies to ruin. It’s less funny when you consider groups who have been marginalized within living memory. The Nazis feared the Jews “race mixing” with Aryan women and tainting their precious breeding stock. In the Jim Crow South, Emmett Till was murdered because a white woman lied and said he whistled at her. Until very recently, the major argument for firing homosexual teachers was the belief that they would sexually prey on children. Now it’s transgender people in bathrooms, who are supposedly out to assault cisgender women and girls. Anybody different, anybody “not from around here,” who talks in a funny language, worships a suspect God, or loves and has sex in an unfamiliar way, can be swept up in the xenophobic paranoia that causes some people to fret about outsiders stealing away their community’s valuable “virtue.” In reality, a random spanko is no more of a threat to a child than a random German, but you can’t get that sweaty preoccupation out of some folks’ minds. So if anybody around here is carrying around secret self-loathing, imagining that they’re somehow undiagnosed pedophiles, stop letting stranger-hating bigots live rent free in your head. (Unless, of course, you you do literally feel urges to have sexual contact with minors, in which case, please get help for that.) We may be no threat to children, but suspicious adults can certainly be a threat to us. There have been a whole lot of innocent people who have been falsely accused, ostracized, arrested, imprisoned, and/or murdered because someone else thought they were “the type” to sexually prey on women and kids. So hiding a powerful attraction to spanking really sucks, in fact it can feel like a denial of your innermost soul, but for some of us it just does not pay to disclose. You’re a little safer if the people around you think you’re pretty much “just like them,” whatever “like them” is in your area if the world. It also helps if people consider you female. I say “consider” because a trans woman (born with a penis) who is totally undetectable as transgender is safer than a trans man (born with a vagina) who is also totally undetectable as transgender. It doesn’t matter who and what you really are—only what others believe you are. I don’t know that anyone has ever come up with a watertight theory about why female “deviants” are usually considered less sexually scary than male “deviants.” However, I suspect it’s related to a complicated knot of assumptions based around the ideas of who can steal or destroy valuable sexual virtue, and who is merely liable to having their sexual virtue stolen. Burglars can attack you—bags of gold can’t. Or something. I know next to nothing about the lady who wrote that famous article about liking to be spanked—only that she’s a lady, and an ee. If I had to make guesses about what her life is like, I’d guess that she looks, talks, worships (or doesn’t), and loves pretty similarly to most of the people who run the police station, successful businesses, and government offices where she lives. She probably doesn’t currently work with kids or large amounts of money, so it doesn’t matter if the public considers her to be extremely trustworthy. Most likely she was in a pretty stable patch in her life when she wrote the article—not getting a bitter divorce, not broke and frantically looking for a job, not trying to get back custody of her kids. In short, not in immediate danger of losing more than she could bear to have taken away from her. I’m probably wrong about at least some of that, I could be wrong about all of it—but I suspect I’m not. And if you live in a situation broadly similar to that (for the most part I do), you seriously might want to consider being open with at least some people. Because A) living a secret double life is awful, and B ) you might convince a few more people to leave their pitchforks and torches at home when it comes to spankos. It’s a way to help spankos who just cannot afford to tell the full truth about themselves right now.
  34. 3 points
    The nice thing about abedtime spankings is it clears out your mind of all the garbage you inevitably think of as soon as your head hits the pillow.
  35. 3 points
    Hello again, ; I've been doing more thinking and feel another rambling coming on... I wanted to share something else I believe I've finally come to realize, whether I'm right or wrong, I'm not sure, but I've come to accept this with a bit of confidence... You don't have to be a "Sub" to need spanking or discipline.... I don't know if I'm stating the obvious, or not making sense at all with this... I've been away for awhile, and haven't really talked to anyone about whatever thoughts , ideas or discoveries I've made, so if this is an old topic, or something silly I apologize.... But this has been such a struggle for me! I've felt a need for spanking since I was a child, and all through adulthood I've been trying to find my place, but all these "Labels" have just muddied the waters so much for me, I felt pulled in different directions, trying to find the right mold that I can fit into, listening far too much about what others told me I was, rather than asking myself who I am... I need spanking. I need discipline and structure. I crave an authority figure that I may submit to. I need someone to take my hand and guide me, and I want to put my trust in that person.... But I am *not* a submissive by nature. I'm (mostly) independent, passionate, ambitious, I know what I want in life and I know where I want to go. I know what my needs are, I know what feels right to me, and I know what feels wrong to me. and that is.... *okay* Just because I need structure, doesn't mean I *have* to be a submissive doormat.... It doesn't mean I have to live my life as a follower, it doesn't mean I can't be a leader myself... Other people might be submissive by nature, and that's okay. Some people need to submit to someone 24/7 and that's okay too. Some people are perfectly happy in DD relationships where they act as the support, and allow their HoH to make all the decisions as they follow along..... and that's alright.... This might be the case more often then not, but it doesn't *have* to be... I'm not talking about topping from the bottom here.... I'm talking about people who just have certain "needs" ... structure, discipline, guidance, submission to an authority figure, but who aren't defined by that... When I made my first search into spanking as an adult, I was led to BDSM, and the whole master/slave thing... When I tried to talk to someone about my feelings there, I was told that "I have a need to be controlled, and if I don't give into that 24/7, if I don't find someone to fully control me, that I can fully submit to and relinquish all my choices and privileges to, I'd never be happy" Later on, others told me "You're just a sub.... It's all a kink, a sexual thing, and you'll never be happy in a relationship where you can't experience it in that way, you need a Dom, and you'll never be happy unless you find one, because you're a sub...." And soon after that, when I tried domestic discipline..... people told me "Unless you fully give up the wheel, and your husband takes control, it will never work... you can't have a functional marriage when you need to submit, but your husband wants you as an equal... in fact you can't have what you need if you see yourself as an equal..." This was so frustrating for me, and I felt so much pressure and guilt, like I was failing somehow.... I tried to give up control, I tried to be submissive.... I tried to push that role on my husband who didn't want it, and tried to submit to him as some sort of authority figure which I never felt.... it always felt wrong to me somehow..... and wrong to him... like we were both trying to fit into molds that just weren't meant for us.... mostly it was me, I craved discipline and tried to be who I needed to be to satisfy that craving, never realizing that all I had to do was be myself, that my needs didn't define me... At some point, (Its a long story) I had a bit of an epiphany moment where it just really struck me, that I am *not* a sub! (at least I don't *think* I am.... ) I remember exclaiming that to my husband, and him having this worn out, sarcastic "You think?!" look on his face.... as if this should have been the most obvious thing in the world to me, he's known it for awhile, and who knows why I had to go on pretending so much as I did.... But while it felt wonderful to say it, I felt really confused.... because I ***did*** need that discipline and structure.... I needed someone I could submit to ...... I feel comforted by such a thing, it really is a deep seated need... and it took awhile for me to see those two things as two separate things... Not so long ago, my husband and I changed the dynamics of our relationship, we went back to the way things were before... He's never fit the role of HoH, I've never fit the role of submissive wife to him... He's laid back and hates making decisions, I'm full of ambitions, and enjoy making decisions about our house, and living situation, he doesn't really have any life plans, and I like that I can follow mine... I like having the freedom to move forward..... Whether I would feel this way if I had been married to someone else I'm not sure, we've always been on equal footing, always been more like "chums" or "buddies" than anything.... But I do have that need, but it's a separate thing for me... for awhile, I sought out discipline from him, not as an authority figure, but more on the level of "A friend" but it wasn't really good enough, for either of us... It really is true that I need a figure of authority, and I do need to submit to that, but everyone has their own reasons, and mine are my own... For me, it's all about knowing *why* I have a need to be spanked, it all stems from childhood, the lack of care, guidance and discipline back then, that just stayed with me as an adult.. part of me still feels a lot of that... but just as a child has basic needs to be cared for and guided, they are still their own person, they are defined by their need for guidance.... thats just something they need is all.... This is me with discipline... I need guidance, but I'm still my own person, I don't have to be a sub... I can enjoy the love, care, guidance, take comfort from the structure and discipline, enjoy the security , feel all the emotions of putting my trust into whoever might be my mentor or disciplinarian, submit to them as I would a father , or a teacher, or anyone one who might be looking out for me, and it's all okay, I don't have to muddle things up with labels, I can just be me. The me that kinda got lost somewhere along the line while growing up and moving forward in life... Though sometimes I still muddy up the waters a bit... there are times in our chummy laid back marriage that I get flustered, or I sometimes wish or hope he'd take me in hand, I won't deny that I sometimes wish for or hope for things... it still does take an effort sometimes to remind myself that I'm feeling this way, because I just have needs to be met, and of course anything related to that is going to have a strong appeal to me... I didn't go into this marriage with intentions of having a DD set up, and neither did he though, we got married because we got along and were comfortable with eachother, we wanted to move on up in life together, hand in hand... Hmm, after typing all of this, it's got me thinking again, and part of me says this with full confidence and certainty, and another part of me does wonder if I'm right or might be mistaken... ack I'm tempted to just delete this whole thing o.O; *suddenly feeling awkward and foolish*.... thoughts?
  36. 3 points
    I’ve actually never been spanked in the “conversational” style. My disciplinarians have all been of the “no more talk—now it’s time to pay for what you did” school. And I do have to say that a properly-wielded paddle makes some very convincing arguments—the kind there are no sassy answers for. That said, I can see how talking could be effective. A message like “What you did is unacceptable, and you’re going to be spanked very hard every time you repeat that misbehavior” might carry a lot more weight if the spankee’s bottom can immediately feel what that means. Sometimes if you haven’t been spanked in a while, threats of “a hard paddling” start to sound like the kind of thing you might be able to safely ignore. (They’re not.) I have to say I really don’t see the point in extracting promises and the like while an ee is actively getting their butt blistered. Speaking from personal experience, a person whose ass is on fire will literally say anything to get their spanker to end a punishment. It doesn’t matter how honest an ee usually is. We’re all used car salesmen when we’re staring at that carpet, shocked all over again at just how much a real spanking can hurt.
  37. 3 points
    Today I’m grateful for: 1. Family 2. Staring down the grim reaper 3. Forgiveness
  38. 3 points
    I think both spanker and spankee need to be on the same page about natural bodily functions and how to deal with them. Over the years I've spanked many women during their period and nearly always a tampon was adequate to assure there would be no issues. A few of the women I spanked regularly never used tampons for personal reasons, and we just took steps like putting a folded up towel under her during the spanking, which also worked fine. None of them ever seemed embarrassed by my knowing it was that time of the month and we agreed to continue our regular procedure of spanking on the bare bottom. I have no issues at all with bodily functions and just accept such things as matter of fact, while continuing to treat the spankee with respect and allowing her to decide what her own comfort level is. I have to agree that if it's a hard limit for either person, then other arrangements need to be negotiated such as leaving underpants on, or rescheduling for the first clear day. What I did notice with several of the women was that their tolerance for pain was different during their period or shortly beforehand, and that was taken into account and the spanking was adjusted accordingly out of respect for their heightened sensitivity to discomfort.
  39. 3 points
    Young woman? 😂 am I that old already? But I’m seriously looking for a profile picture. You should update yours, the Yin/yang Is so 90’s.... 90 demerits for you you!
  40. 3 points
    In retrospect ,I would say no safe word, only, if you had a good relationship with your top, and it was a person you trusted and respect with such a matter.
  41. 3 points
    Searching for an older male experienced spanker..why is it so hard? I love bare bottom, otk spankings with hand, hairbrush or switch :)
  42. 3 points
    I don't know if this will be any comfort to you, but know your not alone. Many have similar stories about having to deal with a spanking fetish in their lives. And your totally right. it's not easy. I had my first marriage break up in part to it, foregone relationships that might have been because it always was lurking in the background. Before the internet came along and I found out that many people share this I felt alone, and ashamed. But at least now I understand that a great many very good folks share this, we come from all backgrounds and walks of life. I know that won't make it easier, but trust me, your OK. There are much worse things people could be in life. I've meant some genuinely nice folks here and on other sites similar to this, and I've run across some real jerks, but in what part of life isn't that always the case. I am in the closet in my current marriage about my spanking desires, I don't want to deal with the aggravation that comes with trying to explain to a non spanko what it's like, I don't believe the majority can ever understand. But at least being able to share with kindred spirits on sites like this lessens the hurt. I have no doubt your a good person and your dealing with it the best you can. Hang in there, your not alone.
  43. 2 points
    Hi Chawsee, I started to reply to this message thinking that I would have something to contribute and after a very short period of time realized that my answer is probably "I don't know." After all my years of introspection and learning psychotherapy, as well as having very talented therapist help me at accept my spanking needs, I do not know why this sort of spanking is so important to me. i know the craving goes back to very early childhood. I got one spanking like this as a child from my father over his lap but I'm not trying to re-create this. I can relate more to the Lord of acid song, "Spank my booty" where the singer was being spanked by her father as a child and says, "I begged his tender mercy through the tears in my eyes but he didn't know that he had shown me paradise." She acted out time after time to provoke him to spanking her to tears and beyond. I'm not wanting a spanking from my father. He introduced me to it, but it was already there. Instead, I want from a strong determined woman with a paddle who will not stop until I'm reduced to a sobbing boy. Not being able to explain is an unusual place for me having spent my career writing solutions and advice after solving difficult problems for companies as a consultant. But I can't. I think it the appeal is partially just the pure physical stimulation. I once had a therapist explain to my wife that I get such a strong physically satisfying reaction to a severe spanking that there would be nothing that would meet my needs aside from very risky fast driving and aerobatic flying in a fashion some might consider to be reckless. (I can't believe I did some of the stupid things.) it was tempting to talk about subspace but as Spanknutt and others have pointed out, I can reach that in many ways. In fact, I don't always really enter subspace after one of these severe spankings. I reached subspace yesterday after a very gentle hand spanking during sex. I could also talk about wanting to feel it for several days later. Or, I might say it totally clears my head. Or causes me to totally let go. or get the same endorphin rush of hovering a helicopter. (The helicopter won hands down and damn near bankrupted me.) Although I think all of those are true for me, they are not the answer to the question you asked. Every single one of these can be accomplished in some other way. For some reason, we've have decided in SN that it's not generally okay to talk about sex in connection of spanking. I think we're trying to distinguish ourselves from those who have realized that a hand spanking during passionate sex increases the pleasure, a bit like jalapenos for those of us who live in Texas. But for me, there's no sexual rush that even begins to approach one after I've been spanked to oblivion. But that's still not the main reason. And I still don't really know. Just thinking about this kind of spanking causes me to shiver in excitement. I really crave it. I really dread it. in fact, even talking about this is making me wonder if I can gain the courage to contact my friend and asked her for a punishment spanking. (I've now backed down from asking directly for it several times.) I haven't had one in a while and I fear it. She has given me plenty of these very severe paddle spankings that wind up with bruises and very raw bottoms. We've even photographed our sessions with the rather substantial damage afterwards. I still fear asking her. But I'm not answering your question. I put this kind of spanking in the same category as running, eating great food, playing with my dogs, riding horses, romantic sex and deep breathing. They all satisfy some kind of PRIMAL need that I've had all of my life. I remember being in junior high school whenI tried to spank myself to this level. I was craving it in fourth grade when I watched a teacher paddle another child to tears. He was crying uncontrollably. I so wanted to take his place. I didn't just want to feel the paddle, I wanted my teacher to firmly but lovingly to reduce me to tears. But the tears are a byproduct. I really wanted to hurt that bad. I want that incredibly painful feeling to overwhelmed me and spread throughout my body. I want to scream. Yes, I want to cry. I want to beg, but in my case today, I sure better not beg because she can last forever and I'm going up a huge price for begging. ("Are you telling me what to do?" is really something I promise you I do not want to hear.) And I want to be totally spent. At the end, I want to be proud of myself that I took it. So, I've just proven that I don't know why. Maybe somebody else will be more successful in answering the question. I don't know, but I want it probably more than almost anything else in the that would be considered discretionary..
  44. 2 points
    Hello everyone, I'm a mathematics sophomore. With this COVID going around, I've been falling behind on my school work. I'm here to look for a motherly figure to provide some discipline and chat with all you folks. As you can probably tell, I love (or hate) canes, but also crops. Looking forward to chatting
  45. 2 points
    Not my typical pic post, but it made me smile. I haven't actually used the 'make me' one, but other 'fueled' responses I 'may' have used include: whatever, promises promises and my favourite, get it yourself. Can y'all think of any others?
  46. 2 points
    I have learned that the embarrassment of a fully grown adult lady being over the knees while being spanked helps, along with thorough scolding, to bring about tears in a woman. Many females would like to cry and think that the physicality of the spanking produces the tears, but they need someone who will look past the physicality and center on the emotional aspect. This produces the lovely tears streaming down the face of the beautiful lady, making her even more beautiful in a different way.
  47. 2 points
    I’m asexual, so yes, I can totally be disciplined and not be sexually aroused or it be sexual in anyway. But someone spanking you is not a medical doctor OR your therapist. If you have struggles with mental health — you still need to be seeing the proper people to assist with that. Spanking does NOT replace a therapist.
  48. 2 points
    A couple of folks said a 'no nonsense' spanking has no safe word. No matter the reason I would NEVER submit to a spanking without a safeword. You never know when something unexpected happens that would require the spanking to stop. Besides the basic tenant here is adult 'Consensual' spanking. Thus the spankee can revoke consent at ANY time and the spanking must stop or else a legal line is being crossed. Even, to my my way of thinking, 'consensual non-consent' involves consent that can be revoked at any time for any reason. Just because you took a spanking last week with paddle x, does not mean the same spanking today will not cause an unexpected physical, psychological or other result that would require the spanking to stop immediately. So to my way of thinking 'no nonsense no safeword are not the same thing. Just my humble opinion.
  49. 2 points
    There is something quite visually pleasing about a female bottom awaiting a spanking, wearing traditional white cotton briefs. I don't like to see a spankee dressed in anything even remotely sexy.
  50. 2 points
    If someone were to take me to the woodshed I'd run screaming in the opposite direction. That action would probably only come with more consequences but I'm more afraid of the spiders and crawly things one finds in a woodshed then the spanking that's coming. Now if spiders didn't exist....maybe.
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