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Topping from the bottom



I’ve often been told I top from the bottom. Basically if I don’t feel the situation is going the way I want it I tell the other person what I want. In most cases having an open line of communication is a good thing but doing this prevents my tops from being able to be in control. So, I’d thought I list some things that I like to hear in my blog. 

If you message me asking if I have behaved my answer will almost certainly always be yes because in my eyes I haven’t done anything wrong.

I have some personal goals like weight loss and confidence building so it would be better to be more specific with questions. 

For example: Have you had any water today? Have you worked out today? Have you eaten any sweets today? Have you put yourself down today? What have you done for yourself today? 

My response to these questions would more than likely be more honest. Like, have you had a glass a water today? Knowing I should have been drinking water and not having drank any water I would answer no. Then beginning the questions of why not? Is that a good excuse? What should you have done? Telling me how disappointed you are. 

Which would inevitably lead to being told I will be given a spanking.

Just jumping straight to a spanking takes all the “fun” out of it. 

Scolding me during the spanking about my behavior is also something that I like so if we’re texting send me a message that I can read while I’m being spanked or standing in the corner or tell me I’m grounded from TV, sweets, bread, or whatever else you may think I’d learn from. 

Then that gives you more questions to ask! Did you eat any sweets today? If I’m not supposed to then that’s blatantly disobeying and a spanking would be in order. 

I want to hear something like, Excuse me? What did you just say? Haven’t we discussed this before? And you still did it? Get your butt upstairs and wait for me in the corner! 

Tell me what position I should be in, touching my toes, bent over a chair, etc. (Diaper position is too difficult for me to hold.) 

Give me something to react to and so I can give you something to react to that’s all I ask. 

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Your blog is well written and provides helpful insights into what you need, what you like, and what you don’t.  That’s not “topping from the bottom,” that’s communicating clearly.  

You’re right about one thing (many things, actually 👍).  You’re way too hard on yourself.  Time to get a coach to help you get over this self defeating habit! You do the work.  He provides the needed external structure, encouragement, motivational inspiration, and, of course, the much needed scolding, discipline, and, occasionally, serious punishment.  When your in an “all or nothing, oh I’ve blown it, I quit. “ mood a quick trip to the nearest family restroom for a correctional lecture and a spanking will get you back on track and help you stay on that constructive path.  Your better self sets the goals and direction, your coach helps you acquire the necessary skills to get you there (or else 😉).


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