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#1 Belt_Needed

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Posted 12 March 2010 - 01:33 PM


First of all, I'm pleased that we are attracting more Male-Male Spanking interested guys. Not all that long ago, everytime that I posted, I had to defend my spanking need, despite the fact that I would post non-sexual.

It's true all of us on S.N.'s likely developed our own Spanking needs through our own life's experiences.

For me, I grew up with a very abusive father. My memory is pretty solid by about age 4 1/2. I never remember getting his belt for the first time. I got it often & hard. Always pants up & always bruised from my waist down to the backs of my knees. I recall many a time getting dressed in gym class with my butt to the lockers & I didn't shower when marked. Thinking back, the school staff must have known, because I never got in trouble for not showering on those days.

I realized in adolescence at about age 9 that while I was naughty & deserved spankings, I needed to find a father who not only disciplined me, but cared about me as well. So... from then on, it was a silent search to find a caring dad who would care about me, give me hugs & forgive me after I was spanked. Of course I was a farm kid who had very little exposure to opportunities for such.

Fast forward to high school. By then, I was a foster kid & foster homes did not spank regardless how "bad" or mouthy I was. I did experience some male caring but still I yearned for caring dad spankings. I almost succeeded once in high school, but I didn't have it in me to be disobedient to a male teacher that respected me as a Christian student.

Then came college & more college. Once married, I mentioned my M-M spanking interest only once which prompted my need for counseling? The counselor had only heard of adult spanking once & it wasn't healthy so I didn't revisit there again! ;)

Much later came the divorce from the "Love of my life". I had so many issues to deal with, & my spanking needs just kept bubbling to the surface. So, for the first time in my life, I got on the old internet & began searching to see if I was the only one who ever experienced this "Abnormal" need. To my great surprise, I was not! I proceeded cautiously, & found a guy who came to my house & gave me a spanking that he would have given to his own son a few years prior. I was amazed how much it hurt & how little that I could take.

I also found a spanking dad in Ohio who also grew up with an abusive father. His interest is in giving Dad-Son nurturing experiences. He spanks a little but gives affirmations & hugs & holding. The first time I visited him, several hours after he left, I bawled like a baby in the motel room. I had never been held or felt cared for by another male.

Now, several years later, I have developed good solid Male to Male Spanking friendships. I've received quite a few spankings. I have accountability partners that don't let me get by with my crap. I get real spankings sometimes & sometimes "Just Because" ones. I have self-esteem that I've never had before. I'm pretty sure that while some of my friends find that they don't need spanking for long term, that I am probably one that will always need somewhat frequent Male to Male Spankings!

Now, your turn to share...

#2 Hotstrap

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Posted 12 March 2010 - 07:35 PM


...I mentioned my M-M spanking interest only once which prompted my need for counseling? The counselor had only heard of adult spanking once & it wasn't healthy so I didn't revisit there again! ;)

Yeah, I told a counselor once that I was a spanko. I'm sure it caught him by surprise. He said he'd heard that spanking with surgical tubing was good because it was intense but doesn't leave any marks. Actually, I admired the guy for trying to keep the conversation going after I'd wrong-footed him so badly. But he wasn't really prepared to go there, so we went on to other subjects.

...I was amazed how much it hurt & how little that I could take.

I like it that way. I guess I've gone against the general trend by directing my fantasies to milder and more moderate scenarios.

#3 ammon

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Posted 12 March 2010 - 08:52 PM

Hey, beltneeded,

I liked the pic of the belt, and right away felt that i needed that belt across my bare bum. Thanks for sharing your experiences; feel welcome to share more of them. I think hearing what others have gone through helps me in some way, and i'm glad i'm not the only one who needs a paddling--or more accurately, consistent, regular paddlings. I'm also always glad to know that at least somewhere exist men willing to spank other men, and that it can take place in a totally normal way.

I agree that very few counselors have any understanding of this need. What surprises me is that nobody ever studies this need. Are we so radically outnumbered by other needs and fetishes, that our need isn't even ever given a second thought (let alone a first thought!)?

Also, if you feel ok telling us, i was curious about your having grown up on a farm, and then becoming a foster child. How did that happen? --Don't feel like you need to tell us anything that is too personal or hurts to bring up; but if you're ok talking about it, we'd like to learn and understand.

My own father was also quite abusive, but never loving in any way. I resented, even kind of hated him for it. His abuse was entirely undeserved and out of line. I've never really figured out whether that is part of my need for solid paddling. However, i've never had any interest in the father/son scenarios, none whatever. I just need some solid paddling, and i relish the idea of submitting.

ammon

#4 spankyboy

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Posted 21 March 2010 - 07:50 AM

Wow, I am always a little depressed when I read of spanking abuse suffered at an early age. I got lots of spankings growing up and never considered them abusive or excessive. I did feel a lot of shame and guilt because I secretly liked spankings but never felt abused.

I began meeting with male disciplinarians in my late 20's. I found through personal ads that there were a lot of male disciplianrians willing to spank in a "no sexual contact" manner. The few women who ever responded to my ads wanted compensation for serivices rendered. I have grown to actually prefer male disciplianrians, it is far less complicated and very straightforward. It is very much like a trip to the principal's office.

I am currently reporting to a retired male disciplianrian several times a month for traditional otk spankings and school style paddlings. We have established a routine that we are both comfortable with. While the act of spanking is intimate, there is never a time when I am touched inappropriately or pressured towards sexual contact. The arrangement is simple - he gives the spankings, I get the spankings. When I report I know exactly what will take place - I get spanked and paddled on my underpants, then I am spanked and paddled bare bottom.

I very much enjoy reporting to my very own "school principal" who provides me with traditional old school discipline in the form of spankings and paddlings. Our sessions take a little over half an hour and when I leave I am wearing very well spanked and paddled underpants. I was contacted just this moring and told to report this tuesday. I am already looking forward to it. I know very soon I will be "bottoms up" in a most embarrassing position getting exactly what I need and deserve.

To those of you frustrated in attempts to find a needle in a haystack - a female disciplinarian - I urge you to give m/m spankiing a chance.

SB

#5 ammon

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Posted 21 March 2010 - 07:22 PM

Hey....

I enjoyed your comment that spankings have given you self-esteem you never had before. Wow, what a contrast to what psychologists say about spanking (they say it destroys all self-esteem). I hadn't thought about it much that way. If i ever get spanked or paddled again, i'll have to take note of it. I also think getting paddled helps me do a lot of what i should do, and that helps me possibly with self-esteem; and of course the paddling is what started it!

Spanky boy....
Cute avatar/picture you have exposing your red, burned bum as you check it in the bathroom mirror. I suppose most of us do that for several days after a good paddling?

Thanks for your comments and insights...that men will spank just to spank, but Women want money for it. I like your arrangement with the former school principal. Since he calls you to come and get a spanking, he obviously enjoys paddling you and getts something out of it. I've always hoped to find someone like that--someone who needs to paddle, gets something out of it, maybe even needs to do it. I think that otherwise, it's not a very satisfying paddling. It would help if it were really good for both persons instead of just the one getting paddled. Sure, i'd really prefer a Female disciplinarian and paddler, but i'd sure accept a paddling from a male. I've even tried for one several times (unsuccessfully).

Good luck to everyone. May the paddling not only continue, but expand exponentially.

#6 spankyboy

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Posted 22 March 2010 - 08:23 AM

Hey Ammon,

Thanks for the comments. Just to clarify, my current disciplianrian is retired but was not a school principal. I just view him in that manner. It is easier for me to deal with the dynamic of m/m spanking discipline to think of him in that context. I was a regular visitor to the principal's office in my school days and was quite familiar with school spankings and paddlings, read on...

Years ago I did happen to encounter a retired school principal through a personal ad I had placed. Through our conversations he assured me, that from his experience, there were a number of male students he saw over the years (like me) that wanted and needed spankings and paddlings. He was more than happy to oblige. I do know that I did engage in minor misbehavior in school on purpose just to provoke a spanking or a paddling. I was glad to find out I was not the only one. I suspect there were quite a few, just like me, that wanted to go otk for a spanking or bend over for the paddle.

School spankings and paddlings were always quite exciting. My seeing a disciplinarian now is just like revisiting those wonderful schooldays and a time when a student could get the paddling he secretly wanted and required.

SB

#7 Hotstrap

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Posted 25 March 2010 - 07:42 AM

...I've always hoped to find someone like that--someone who needs to paddle, gets something out of it, maybe even needs to do it. I think that otherwise, it's not a very satisfying paddling. It would help if it were really good for both persons instead of just the one getting paddled...


I can speak only for myself. I'm sure people have different experiences. I'm a switch and as such I always empathize with the person I'm spanking. I want to hand out the right amount of physical pain stimulus of the type that the spankee expects and desires. The pleasure for me is to watch the spankee react physically and mentally to each swat and eventually succeed in not only absorbing it, but achieving a mental mastery of the situation.

I think when two switches get together for a spanking, it's as if they are both seeing reflections of themselves in the other person. Like putting two mirrors together and seeing infinity as they reflect into one another. I don't know if I've managed to capture the essence of the way empathic switches experience spanking. It's like two people going on an adventure together and cheering each other on to triumph. It's rare, and for me it's beautiful. The mind-to-mind connection is the fundamental thing for me. I guess that's why it's of secondary importance to me whether my spanking partners are male or female.

#8 MissBam

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Posted 25 March 2010 - 12:46 PM

[quote name='Hotstrap' date='25 March 2010 - 06:42 AM' timestamp='1269524578' post='28164']
I can speak only for myself. I'm sure people have different experiences. I'm a switch and as such I always empathize with the person I'm spanking. I want to hand out the right amount of physical pain stimulus of the type that the spankee expects and desires. The pleasure for me is to watch the spankee react physically and mentally to each swat and eventually succeed in not only absorbing it, but achieving a mental mastery of the situation.

Hey, Hotstrap,

Kudos to you! I think you found the words to describe my feelings as a spanker as well...thanks!

I can echo those sentiments exactly and liked the rest of your post as well.

MB
Never let your morals get in your way of doing what's right.

#9 jonw

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Posted 19 April 2010 - 01:14 PM


First of all, I'm pleased that we are attracting more Male-Male Spanking interested guys. Not all that long ago, everytime that I posted, I had to defend my spanking need, despite the fact that I would post non-sexual.

It's true all of us on S.N.'s likely developed our own Spanking needs through our own life's experiences.

For me, I grew up with a very abusive father. My memory is pretty solid by about age 4 1/2. I never remember getting his belt for the first time. I got it often & hard. Always pants up & always bruised from my waist down to the backs of my knees. I recall many a time getting dressed in gym class with my butt to the lockers & I didn't shower when marked. Thinking back, the school staff must have known, because I never got in trouble for not showering on those days.

I realized in adolescence at about age 9 that while I was naughty & deserved spankings, I needed to find a father who not only disciplined me, but cared about me as well. So... from then on, it was a silent search to find a caring dad who would care about me, give me hugs & forgive me after I was spanked. Of course I was a farm kid who had very little exposure to opportunities for such.

Fast forward to high school. By then, I was a foster kid & foster homes did not spank regardless how "bad" or mouthy I was. I did experience some male caring but still I yearned for caring dad spankings. I almost succeeded once in high school, but I didn't have it in me to be disobedient to a male teacher that respected me as a Christian student.

Then came college & more college. Once married, I mentioned my M-M spanking interest only once which prompted my need for counseling? The counselor had only heard of adult spanking once & it wasn't healthy so I didn't revisit there again! ;)

Much later came the divorce from the "Love of my life". I had so many issues to deal with, & my spanking needs just kept bubbling to the surface. So, for the first time in my life, I got on the old internet & began searching to see if I was the only one who ever experienced this "Abnormal" need. To my great surprise, I was not! I proceeded cautiously, & found a guy who came to my house & gave me a spanking that he would have given to his own son a few years prior. I was amazed how much it hurt & how little that I could take.

I also found a spanking dad in Ohio who also grew up with an abusive father. His interest is in giving Dad-Son nurturing experiences. He spanks a little but gives affirmations & hugs & holding. The first time I visited him, several hours after he left, I bawled like a baby in the motel room. I had never been held or felt cared for by another male.

Now, several years later, I have developed good solid Male to Male Spanking friendships. I've received quite a few spankings. I have accountability partners that don't let me get by with my crap. I get real spankings sometimes & sometimes "Just Because" ones. I have self-esteem that I've never had before. I'm pretty sure that while some of my friends find that they don't need spanking for long term, that I am probably one that will always need somewhat frequent Male to Male Spankings!

Now, your turn to share...

Well, I'm a straight male switch but have found very few female spanking opportunities in life. It seems there are 1000 male spankos for every one female so recently I swallowed my pride and accepted a spanking from a male. Guess what? It was better than the female pro that I used to go to by a mile! Non sexual but still had that erotic kick that we all crave. After all, It seems to be the thought of getting spanked and dominated that turns me on, not who's doing it. If my girlfriend spanked, it would be heaven but we just can't ask someone to do something like that against their nature.

#10 MissBam

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Posted 20 April 2010 - 01:35 AM

Well, I'm a straight male switch but have found very few female spanking opportunities in life. It seems there are 1000 male spankos for every one female so recently I swallowed my pride and accepted a spanking from a male. Guess what? It was better than the female pro that I used to go to by a mile! Non sexual but still had that erotic kick that we all crave. After all, It seems to be the thought of getting spanked and dominated that turns me on, not who's doing it. If my girlfriend spanked, it would be heaven but we just can't ask someone to do something like that against their nature.


Congrats! Maybe that's what you really needed all along...

MB
Never let your morals get in your way of doing what's right.

#11 johnpaul

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Posted 25 April 2010 - 08:36 AM


First of all, I'm pleased that we are attracting more Male-Male Spanking interested guys. Not all that long ago, everytime that I posted, I had to defend my spanking need, despite the fact that I would post non-sexual.

It's true all of us on S.N.'s likely developed our own Spanking needs through our own life's experiences.

For me, I grew up with a very abusive father. My memory is pretty solid by about age 4 1/2. I never remember getting his belt for the first time. I got it often & hard. Always pants up & always bruised from my waist down to the backs of my knees. I recall many a time getting dressed in gym class with my butt to the lockers & I didn't shower when marked. Thinking back, the school staff must have known, because I never got in trouble for not showering on those days.

I realized in adolescence at about age 9 that while I was naughty & deserved spankings, I needed to find a father who not only disciplined me, but cared about me as well. So... from then on, it was a silent search to find a caring dad who would care about me, give me hugs & forgive me after I was spanked. Of course I was a farm kid who had very little exposure to opportunities for such.

Fast forward to high school. By then, I was a foster kid & foster homes did not spank regardless how "bad" or mouthy I was. I did experience some male caring but still I yearned for caring dad spankings. I almost succeeded once in high school, but I didn't have it in me to be disobedient to a male teacher that respected me as a Christian student.

Then came college & more college. Once married, I mentioned my M-M spanking interest only once which prompted my need for counseling? The counselor had only heard of adult spanking once & it wasn't healthy so I didn't revisit there again! ;)

Much later came the divorce from the "Love of my life". I had so many issues to deal with, & my spanking needs just kept bubbling to the surface. So, for the first time in my life, I got on the old internet & began searching to see if I was the only one who ever experienced this "Abnormal" need. To my great surprise, I was not! I proceeded cautiously, & found a guy who came to my house & gave me a spanking that he would have given to his own son a few years prior. I was amazed how much it hurt & how little that I could take.

I also found a spanking dad in Ohio who also grew up with an abusive father. His interest is in giving Dad-Son nurturing experiences. He spanks a little but gives affirmations & hugs & holding. The first time I visited him, several hours after he left, I bawled like a baby in the motel room. I had never been held or felt cared for by another male.

Now, several years later, I have developed good solid Male to Male Spanking friendships. I've received quite a few spankings. I have accountability partners that don't let me get by with my crap. I get real spankings sometimes & sometimes "Just Because" ones. I have self-esteem that I've never had before. I'm pretty sure that while some of my friends find that they don't need spanking for long term, that I am probably one that will always need somewhat frequent Male to Male Spankings!

Now, your turn to share...



#12 johnpaul

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Posted 25 April 2010 - 08:48 AM

Congrats! Maybe that's what you really needed all along...

MB


I have only been spanked by my wife. I have been involved in this for soon going on 4 year. It is hard to find someone who understands about the need and how it effects you. I started receiving them to help me cope with "peer-pressure" and I was 60 at that time.

I had made friends with a man my age in WA. He helped me, encouraged me, but we never met or had chance to get to where the action was. I was very comfortable with him. I found that he was willing to help and not find fault. When my wife was going to be away, I thought it was set up, but her mother got better and she did not have to go.

Now, I am living in the PI. I work for this Corp. here. I do not even know where to look. So, if you have any information, please let me know, I will be here for 4 years and may retire here. It is really nice and things are affordable, much different than the US.

Thanks and that is the end of my dime.

JP

#13 Hotstrap

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Posted 25 April 2010 - 11:20 AM

I have only been spanked by my wife...I had made friends with a man my age in WA...

Yeah, I wish I could find a local M/M switch my age or older. It's not exactly that I need more spanking experiences, cause I've had plenty, it's more that I'd like to have a few people in my life kind of like myself in that respect. There's lots of M/M spanking where I live but it seems like its mainly much younger people doing it. I don't know if that's because the younger guys are more open minded or the older guys are just not interested any more.

Oh, I guess there are a few other older guys active here but they are only interested in relationships with much younger people. I respect that but it does me no good.

#14 johnpaul

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Posted 25 April 2010 - 08:52 PM

Yeah, I wish I could find a local M/M switch my age or older. It's not exactly that I need more spanking experiences, cause I've had plenty, it's more that I'd like to have a few people in my life kind of like myself in that respect. There's lots of M/M spanking where I live but it seems like its mainly much younger people doing it. I don't know if that's because the younger guys are more open minded or the older guys are just not interested any more.

Oh, I guess there are a few other older guys active here but they are only interested in relationships with much younger people. I respect that but it does me no good.


When I lived in WA there were folks who wanted to spank, but not folks my age. But, even with folks my age, the spanking still works. My wife is short, I am long, so I have not had the OTK deal yet, it is always bet over or across the bed. Also, spraying water on the paddle and the buns, makes the sting last for awhile, we tried it out, works good, thanks to whoever offered that tip.

JP

#15 johnpaul

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Posted 25 April 2010 - 08:53 PM

Yeah, I wish I could find a local M/M switch my age or older. It's not exactly that I need more spanking experiences, cause I've had plenty, it's more that I'd like to have a few people in my life kind of like myself in that respect. There's lots of M/M spanking where I live but it seems like its mainly much younger people doing it. I don't know if that's because the younger guys are more open minded or the older guys are just not interested any more.

Oh, I guess there are a few other older guys active here but they are only interested in relationships with much younger people. I respect that but it does me no good.


When I lived in WA there were folks who wanted to spank, but not folks my age. But, even with folks my age, the spanking still works. My wife is short, I am long, so I have not had the OTK deal yet, it is always bet over or across the bed. Also, spraying water on the paddle and the buns, makes the sting last for awhile, we tried it out, works good, thanks to whoever offered that tip.

JP

#16 spankboy12

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Posted 29 October 2010 - 04:42 PM

New here and trying to learn how to post. I'm a self spanker/ct guy. I received several hidings when I was growing up, as well as several hours standing at my desk or in the corner at school. I just discovered in the last couple of years that I like self-induced discipline, though I also like the idea of being restrained and spanked by another person. I do take discipline from an online mentor. Just wanted to get started posting.

Thanks
spankboy12

#17 boyedwin

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Posted 15 September 2011 - 04:52 PM

New here and trying to learn how to post. I'm a self spanker/ct guy. I received several hidings when I was growing up, as well as several hours standing at my desk or in the corner at school. I just discovered in the last couple of years that I like self-induced discipline, though I also like the idea of being restrained and spanked by another person. I do take discipline from an online mentor. Just wanted to get started posting.

Thanks
spankboy12



#18 Guest_mttcf25_*

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Posted 19 September 2011 - 07:13 AM

I rarely comment on here but I found the dialogue very interesting. Thought I'd add my two cents.

I grew up in a home with loving parents but a dad who was preoccupied. I was never spanked at home except for a few slaps on occassion from a frusrated mom. I didn't really know it then but I was actually longing for a dad that would take an interest and even punish me from time to time. I certainly needed it. I knew of friends and cousins who got the strap, belt, or paddle once in awhile and I was jealous in a scared/ fascinated sort of way.

I developed a typical porn habit as a teen (found dad's stash) and did a lot of snooping to find more when it went under the matress. I always felt guilty about it and now wish I'd been caught and spanked soundly for it. Oddly, as I grew I focused more and more on spanking as it showed up in porn and specifically sought it out. Then came adulthood and the internet!

Fast forward. I'm married to a wide who wants NOTHING to do with spanking and I'm still addicted to porn years later. I always assumed I wanted to spank or be spanked by a woman since it turned n me on so much. Wasn't ever
going to happen of course. Then I began to look inside and make sense of it.

I knew I needed to be spanked. I knew it could never happen with another woman as it would be cheating in my mind. Obsessed with the need, I turned to a guy I found on this forum who was older and willing to help. It turned out to be what I needed all along.

I think he realizes by now that my need to be punished for all those past misdeeds is pretty strong. He spanks me hard as I have asked him to do. U always set up the spankings as responses to actual things I have done or am doing. MOST of those are still pornography related. I doubt I'll ever break the habit for real (although it wastes SO much of my time) but as I was never broken of it as a boy I feel the strong need to try.

The spankings are long and hard and painful. I HATE going there but it is ME that sets them up. I dread walking up to his door but cannot express the relief it brings me when he shuts the door behind me and takes control. Once the door shuts I'm a little boy again and he does the talking. I don't leave until he decides I've had enough. It's what I needed growing up. The only thing I haven't done yet is cry and I wish that would come. Maybe in time.

#19 too cheeky

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Posted 21 September 2011 - 06:39 AM

Hey Belt_Needed.

I have belt, OTK strap, tawse and razor strop. Offer open. PM me if interested.

#20 johnpaul

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Posted 21 September 2011 - 08:54 AM

just wondering??? If you know anyone in the Philippines who does this?

Thanks,

JP




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